User talk:TheEileen/Feb 2010
February 2010
23 Feb 2010
Updated list and wiki. Four projects moved status and one posted. Yay. I have done some feedback and a little mentoring but no further with Ibsen.
House - so I now know I have to stop this knee-jerk reaction built into me by my childhood/mother of always needing to be so super efficient. I should never have taken the week off to relax and then thought "I know, I'll arrange to have contract work done in the house too". I was not able to relax at all the whole week. I had to prep the house for them to come in, I had to be up not only about the same time as if I were working but I couldn't go (I felt) and just spend some relaxing time at the cafe. I could go, but had to keep an eye on the clock the whole time to let the contractors in. The guy kept re-arranging the week and the days. It was supposed to be Tuesday morning, then all day Wednesday, and all day Thursday and done. First, he moved Tuesday morning to Tuesday afternoon, so I had four hours in the am to "do what I wanted" and then had to be home by noon to let him in so of course, I didn't go anywhere. I had thought to go to a movie in the afternoon, but couldn't now. Then on Wednesday, when he did show up in the morning (always on time) and was done about 3pm, he said that he needed to wait until Friday to do anywork so I was "free" Thursday, which I hadn't planned on and now not free from friday, which I *had* planned on. Then he called and left a message that he'd only be there a few hours Friday afternoon, not the whole day. So I called to say, so, you plan to paint but when exactly were you putting in the flooring, doing the trim, putting the toilet back and all the finishing touches? It turns out that he just presumed that he could come back the following week and take care of all that and that he'd only planned to paint on Friday ... afternoon. So, his sister in law (who works with him - so does his brother), came and painted in the morning, and he showed up at noon to do his thing. But he didn't factor in the trim or anything (meaning, he should have had his sister stay and paint the trim so it would be dry by install, but he spaced. He is a nice guy, I will give him a generally good review, but he didn't finish. My flooring is in but not completed. He has to come back and do the trim, put back in the registers and such, put the toilet back in, cap the pipes, and such and it is about 3 more hours of work.
On top of which, my friend John managed to completely ignore the several times I ended up saying that I was taking time off this week to decide that he needed to have me pick him up at the garage where he dropped off his car for work. Which he arranged to have happen at 7am so that I could make it to work. He tells/ "asks" me this on the Friday before. I tell him for the sixth time (no exaggeration) that I'm off and he is only mildly interested and it is "too late" to change the time of his car drop off. So Friday I really had to get up early to go get him. He said he'd call me when his car was ready. He had to be here by no later than 7pm (which came up in relation to him saying that if I got stuck with the contractor, I didn't have to come get him exactly when he called).
So, I am doing my taxes (oh joy) and I hear the contractor saying he has like 2-3 hours of work left but he'll barrel through and I look at the clock and see it is 5pm! So, once I get clear with the contractor that no, he cannot stay until 8 - 8:30 so start wrapping it up and we'll figure something out, I call my friend who says in a casual tone: "Sure the car is ready". Why didn't he call me when the mechanic called him? Um, he's not sure, he doesn't even remember how long ago that was. So, it takes me 30 minutes or so to get the contractor wrapped up *and* I HAVE to eat something or get sick. So, I do exactly what I hadn't wanted to do, and which I told my friend I hadn't wanted to do - drive over to his house at the height of rush hour and back over to the garage during rush hour. What should have been a 20 minute drive was more like 50 minutes each way. We get to the garage just at 7pm and then he turns to me and says "don't you want to do dinner?"
On a Friday night, at 7pm (which is dead in the middle of the eating time here; experience shows that we would be waiting 45 minutes to an hour for a table). And you know, I knew he was going to say that. He is taking being oblivious to new level. He will randomly suggest that we do something at the last minute. I'll remind him that it is too late, the traffic will be heavy, the restaurant doesn't take reservations, maybe we should schedule this for another time, and he'll insist. And then get literally screamingly frustrated with the traffic, the wait for a table, etc. To where he starts cursing and nearly yelling about how crappy everything is and he will then hate the food, hate the service, and be, as you can imagine, a "joy" to be with. And when I say no, or point out these previous issues, he gets angry with me. I wonder if he wonders why I don't spend nearly the time I used to with him. And as far as I can tell, he managed to completely forget it was my birthday week. He gets angry if I mention it at all since he hates birthdays as they equal "I'm old" and he can't imagine why I like them or want to celebrate them so I'm clearly just mentioning mine to make him feel older. :rolls eyes:
You don't throw away 15 years of friendship on some rocky points but I am most certainly not spending as much time with him as I used to for all these reasons.
That being said, all my other friends especially DP and Facebook, went out of their way to wish me a happy birthday. I got a total of 56 birthday cards, wishes, and emails and man, that just absolutely made my day. My childhood dynamic was such that I was the caregiver and I didn't get fusses made over me. So, I really have a craving to be recognized by my friends. To me, someone taking 1 minute to write "happy birthday" means they thought of me and took the time and it means so much - since I rarely got that as a kid. Thank you everyone for making up my emotional lacks! :grin:
Work - about the same. I am doing pretty well with being annoyed with what the guy does (or doesn't do) but not with/at him in particular. Still trying to come to terms with the other one who is also a friend. And get the work done. Keep my boundaries and be communicative. So far so good. I discovered that for some reason I tended to start ranting to myself about what went wrong at work while taking my shower (shrug - no idea). Once I noticed that trait, I squashed it. Per usual, that means my stress levels went down since I wasn't constantly stoking the furnace of resentment. :grin: I've been good about my yoga, even tried some kundalini (I normally vinyasa). WHEW. My gosh, I was EXHAUSTED at the end of it and you aren't doing any big huge movements, but you breath in and out (push the tummy out when inhaling, such the tummy in when exhaling) while moving your arms alternately up and down for two minutes. It is bizarrely tiring. Anyway, didn't get the weights done during the week off due to the complete cock up of my schedule with the house stuff.
Still, the new paint color and flooring look fabulous. Contractor will come back when I've time to arrange it which is looking like April. I have to do work travel in March (ugh) and that'll take up about 3 weeks of my time: 1 to prep, 1 to be gone, 1 to catch up when back. I have one, maybe two different board meetings this weekend, and I'm trying to arrange to have a day with a friend I've not be able to see for over a year. Then there is my yarn friend, it's time for another one of our days. GACK. Can someone please give me enough money to live on and not work so I can manage my volunteer stuff and social life? Oh geez, and I have to do one day of extra stuff for the library guild now I come to think of it, cookies and such for a festival we're part of. March is just booked solid!
16 Feb 2010
Nothing, I had the whole week off and managed to literally forget to do the list and wiki. I foofed. I looked at Ibsen. I tried like the dickens to arrange a meeting of the board. But forgot the list.
11 Feb 2010
I updated the list and the wiki although there was only one project that moved. No posted projects, alas. I have been overwhelmed with this that and the other in life and as such, not so much with the working on DP that I love. I have some Am Miss to do and I want to get to it but my brain is so fried by the time I get home, half the time I just plop down and play solitaire for an hour or so - apparently I need the zen white noise.
I have been good about keeping up my weights and yoga. I did my yoga three times this week and will do my weights tomorrow. I have taken to reminding myself how good and pleased I feel when I do them! It helps that I've figured out how to get my weight workout into a routine. Health generally good so far although the hormones from perimenopausal he** are playing havoc with my skin (okay, why *exactly* am I getting huge red zits on my chin only? My face is mercifully clear but someone actually asked me if I had chicken pox when they saw my neck. Worse yet, any attempt to wear a turtleneck or something to hide it like a scarf seems to exacerbate it and then they hurt and get worse!)(sigh). But otherwise good.
My sleep wasn't so hot for a while in January, and not just from the cold. I was doing this thing where I was tired but not sleepy. My brain was NOT going a a mile a minute, I was zoned out half the time, I just couldn't fall asleep. So, that pattern established itself TOO quickly. I'm unlearning it now. If I feel sleepy, instead of ignoring it, I close my eyes for about a minute and see if I feel bored (not sleepy yet) or do I want to immediately nod off (go to bed!). So far, it's working.
Work - same old, I'm bored with the personnel situations and so not talking about it. Besides, it is one of my "don't complain days". :grin: I miss my friends here and wish I could divest my life of enough stress to come back here more but if you read this - know I love y'all and miss y'all! Be well!
03 Feb 2010
Well, if nothing else, I'm keeping up with the list and wiki! Updated both today. Some movement from waiting to available and two posted. No work on any of my DP stuff. sigh.
So this "warmest January on record" seems to mean it is NOT in the 20s but generally in the 40s. Which isn't horrible. And we had a few wonderful days of upper 40's, clear as clear, with the mountains covered in snow popping on the skyline beautifully. Mt. Ranier can be very pretty some days. Health now better. All things calmed down. I've finished acupuncture and found it did help a lot with my neck and shoulder. My friend with the loom had it for her migraines and it helped. I got to go to "play" with her this weekend and see her wonderful stuff and have a lovely chat while we worked on crafts. Then I went to the other friend's house for dinner. Still trying to arrange the tea and this weekend is definitely Board meeting with my first non-profit. Still need to figure out the DP board meeting and read and send emails on this.
Work may be stressful underneath my conscious in the co-workers area but generally consciouslly I feel okay with it. I have been documenting and noting things. Pointed out again to my boss today that if my co-worker refuses to take any responsibility and says "I'll do what you tell me but you have to assign things", then it isn't fair to pay us the same wage. He isn't living up to his bargain. The work itself is starting to make me cave in. More and more I'm having to read these inch-thick legal documents (no exaggeration) and then give my opinion on them in the areas that concern me. Which means, for instance, I spent 1 hour and 45 minutes reading a proposal to be able to say "nothing in here has to do with my area". And I'm back to defending my boundaries and pushing people back (in a professional way) and saying "Not my area", "Yes, I know I'm helpful, but I cannot help all of you with things that are not my area". Sigh. When Big proposal A comes in and I read it and respond (roughly 2 hours right there), sometimes the writers come back immediately, sometimes they come back days later. I cannot just sit and wait, so I move on to the next one. But today was the day where everyone managed to wait until I was half through the next one before emailing, calling, and IM'ing me on the previous one. I had to juggle three complicated agreements where people were all "clause 6.b.1, is that okay if we use a "the" instead of an "an"? " and over and over, I had to go back and re-read the deuced thing to know the answer. I must have reviewed this one proposal about four times and I'm sick of it, like you wouldn't believe. So, can I then come to DP and read and proof and format? nope, all that energy has been drained. Dang it. I just want to sit and let my brain turn to mush.
And now back to Eileen's Talk