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Narrative of a Private Soldier in His Majesty's 92d Regiment of Foot
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NARRATIVE OF A PRIVATE SOLDIER IN HIS MAJESTY'S 92D REGIMENT OF FOOT.
WRITTEN BY GEORGE BILLANY.
DETAILING
MANY CIRCUMSTANCES RELATIVE TO THE INSURRECTION IN
IRELAND IN 1798; THE EXPEDITION TO HOLLAND IN
1799; AND THE EXPEDITION TO EGYPT IN 1801;
AND GIVING A PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF
HIS RELIGIOUS HISTORY AND EXPERIENCE.
WITH A PREFACE
BY THE REV. RALPH WARDLAW, D. D.
First American edition.
PHILADELPHIA:
PUBLISHED FOR THE BENEFIT OF THE UNITED FOREIGN
MISSIONARY SOCIETY.
1822.
.nf-
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.sp 4
.h2
PREFACE.
.sp 2
Long prefaces to Narratives have seldom, I believe,
the honour of being read through. If the
Narrative possess interest, a tedious recommendation
only detains the reader from his enjoyment;
and if it possess none, it aggravates his disappointment.--I
shall, therefore, be very brief.
The subject of the following Memoir has been
connected with the church under my pastoral care,
nearly since its formation, in the year 1803:--and,
from this, as well as from a circumstance in
his religious history, which the reader will discover
towards the close of the narrative, it may
perhaps be thought, that my recommendations are,
in some degree, dictated by feelings of partiality.
I hope I shall never be so dead to Christian sensibility,
as to feel nothing of the peculiar interest
which the circumstance alluded to, is fitted to produce.
Yet I may say with truth, that the very consciousness
of this interest has made me the more
jealous and scrupulous in giving the advice to
publish; an advice which I never should have
given, unless from a sincere conviction, that the
Narrative is fitted both to please and to profit; to
gratify curiosity, and, through the blessing of God,
to impart instruction and spiritual benefit.
// File: 004.png
The remarks of a private in the ranks, when he
is a man of any shrewdness and observation, on
the incidents that come within his notice, in the
campaigns in which he is engaged, have in them a
particular interest.--Whilst we are pleased with
the degree of intelligence which they discover, we
at the same time feel a satisfying confidence, that
they contain 'a plain unvarnished tale;' unaffected
by any temptation, either 'in aught to extenuate,'
or 'to set down aught in malice.'
The religious experience of the writer, I consider
as especially instructive.--It sets before us, I
believe, in honest simplicity, the workings of a
sensible and thoughtful mind, and of a conscience,
which had never entirely lost its early impressions;--the
convictions, and distresses, and reasonings,--the
self-righteous and self confident resolutions,
and the necessary failures and inconsistencies,
of an awakened but unrenewed state;--the
natural reluctance of man to part with self, to plead
guilty, and to depend on grace; and yet the entire
inefficacy of every thing but this grace either to
impart satisfactory and steadfast peace to the conscience,
or to produce in the heart a principle of
vigorous and cheerful, consistent and persevering
obedience.
Of this grace, although, like every other good
thing, it has been too often perverted and abused
by the self-deceiver and the hypocrite, the native
tendency is, to "teach" all who receive it, to
"deny ungodliness, and worldly desires, and to
live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present
world,"--I feel the delicacy of saying any
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thing in praise of one, whose living eye the commendation
is to meet, and who is still, like all
others, the subject of remaining corruption, and in
danger of injury from its evil propensities; yet, as
it is not himself I commend, but the grace that has
made him what he is, and to which he owns himself
an entire and humble debtor, I feel at liberty
to say, that the subject of the following Narrative,
since he was led to embrace the doctrine of the
cross, has been enabled,--amidst imperfections
and failures no doubt, of which he himself has
been much more sensible than others have been
observant,--to "walk in newness of life," and to
show, that "the gospel of the grace of God" has
been "the power of God unto salvation," when
every thing else had failed, and had led only to
despair.
With the exception of occasional corrections in
the use of words and in the structure of sentences,
unavoidable in revising for the press the manuscript
of one unaccustomed to composition, the style is
the writer's own; the work, throughout, having
been printed from his autograph, without transcription:--and
I pledge my word to the reader,
that a single additional sentiment has not been introduced.
I commend the little volume to the candour of
the reader, and to the blessing of God;--not without
a pleasing hope, that while it may benefit, in a
temporal view, the family of one, whose wound received
in the service of his country, confined him
again, even very recently, from his daily occupation,
for nearly four months; it may, at the same
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time, produce higher and more valuable effects, in
the instruction, admonition, and salvation, of those
who peruse it.
RALPH WARDLAW.
GLASGOW, June 14th, 1819.
.sp 4
.h2
ADVERTISEMENT TO THE SECOND EDITION.
.sp 2
The very kind reception which the public have
given to the first edition, has encouraged the Author
to improve and enlarge the second. The
additions chiefly consist of a more detailed and
combined account of the Insurrection in Ireland,
and the Expeditions to Holland and Egypt. These
additions, he hopes, will make the reading of the
Narrative more pleasant, particularly to young persons.
He has divided it into chapters, and inserted
the number of the regiment he served in; but his
name can be of no consequence to the reader.
// File: 007.png
.sp 4
.h2
CONTENTS.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER I.:chap1#
Cause and design of writing the Narrative. Author attends
the Sabbath School of Dr. Balfour in Glasgow, in
1790. Enlists into the 92d foot, in 1796, and joins the
regiment in Gibraltar in 1797. Behaviour while there.
Returns to England in 1798.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER II.:chap2#
Regiment lands at Dublin, in June, 1798. State of that city
during the insurrection. Conveyed in coaches to Arklow.
Surprises the insurgents on the White Heaps, 5th
July. Particulars of the pursuit and arrival at Gorey.
Instances of the ferocity of civil war. Kind behaviour of
the regiment to the inhabitants. Deserted state of Gorey,
where the Author is much in want of provisions.
Distressing state of the surrounding country. March to
Blessington, and join the brigade of Sir John Moore, and
encamp in the glen of Eimal. Orders against swearing.
State of the insurgents in the Wicklow Mountains.
March to oppose the French who had landed at Killala.
Lie in Athlone during the winter. The Author's religious
experience while there. March to Cork, and
embark for England, June, 1799.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER III.:chap3#
Join the expedition under Sir R. Abercrombie, and sail
for Holland, 6th August. Land near the Helder on the
27th. Action among the sand-hills, and capture of Helder.
Surrender of the Dutch fleet. Advance to the
long dyke; with a description of it, and the surrounding
country. Dutch method of churning butter. Action on
the long dyke, 10th Sept. Repulse of the Duke of
York and the Russians on the 19th. Action on the 2d
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October, near Egmont. Lord Huntly wounded. Sir J.
Moore wounded. Singular action of cavalry. Spectacle
of the dead, and severe loss of the regiment. Singular
death of a Highlander and Frenchman. March
to Alkmaar. Action of the 6th. Author escorts prisoners
on the 7th. Army retreats to the long dyke on
the 8th. Armistice and convention for leaving Holland.
Author takes the ague. Regiment arrives in England,
and goes into Chelmsford Barracks. Religious experience
of the Author while there.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER IV.:chap4#
Regiment embarks at Cowes on board the Diadem, 64, and
Inconstant frigate, 27th May, 1800; and sails for the
coast of France. Anchors at the Isle of Houet, 2d June.
Singular occurrence on the 4th. Intended attack on Belleisle.
Religious seamen on board the Terrible, 74.
Sails for the Mediterranean. Arrival at Minorca on the
21st July. Regiment leaves Minorca on board the Stately,
64. Intended attack upon Cadiz, 6th October.--Dangerous
storm in Tetuan bay. Touches at Minorca
and Malta. The fleet anchors in Marmorice Bay, preparatory
to landing in Egypt. Some account of that
bay and the surrounding country. Author's state of
mind during the passage. He is seized with an infectious
fever. His religious experience during his sickness,
and after his recovery. Sails for Egypt. Objection
against the truth of the Scriptures.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER V.:chap5#
Account of the landing in Egypt, 8th March, 1801. Author
seized with night-blindness. Action of the 13th.
Scarcity of water. Account of the position of the army
and Pompey's Pillar and Cleopatra's Needles. Battle
of the 21st, at which the Author is wounded and sent on
board an hospital ship. Condition and behaviour of the
wounded. Author removed to an hospital at Aboukir.
Lord Hutchison goes with a part of the army to Cairo.
Author's wound gets worse. Troublesomeness of flies
and vermin. Sirocco, or hot wind, and rapid increase
of the plague. Account of several interesting cases.
// File: 009.png
Behaviour of the wounded in Aboukir hospital, and the
Author's religious experience.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER VI.:chap6#
Author embarks for Rosetta. Dangerous passage of the
bar at the mouth of the Nile. Rosetta hospital. Author
dangerously ill. Death of his comrade, &c. Inundation
of the Nile. Skin bottles. Surrender of Alexandria.
Dress of the Sepoys and Egyptian peasants.
Manner of eating their meals. Mahomedan mosques.
Gun fired at mid-day in Cairo by the rays of the sun.
Explosion of a powder chest kills several of the 13th
foot. Remarks on the state of mind in which many died.
Produce and manner of cultivating the Delta. Immense
heaps of grain. Wretchedness of the peasantry. Extracts
from Sir R. Wilson and Dr. Clarke, on the diseases
and plagues of Egypt. The unavoidable evils of War.
Author leaves Rosetta, and sails for England.
.sp 2
#CHAPTER VII.:chap7#
Arrival at Cork. Marches to Kilkenny. Proceeds to London
and admitted an out-pensioner of Chelsea. Arrives
in Glasgow. Retrospect of his military life. Distressing
state of mind. Obtains peace of conscience by
hearing the gospel in Albion-street Chapel, and joins
the church under the care of Dr. Wardlaw.
.sp 2
#POSTSCRIPT.:postscript#
Consists of an Address to readers in general, and to those
in the army in particular, of what the Author wishes
them to learn from the Narrative.
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.sp 4
.h2 id=chap1
CHAPTER I.
.sp 2
Dear Pastor,
I shall now, according to the best of my
ability, attempt to gratify the wish you several
years since expressed, that I would arrange into one
connected narrative, the various particulars I then
communicated to you, of my previous life, and the
exercises of my mind; its various workings, and
conflicts, until the period when I was brought to
the knowledge of Jesus, as the only and all-sufficient
Saviour.
In drawing up this account of myself, my motive
is, to record the loving-kindness of the Lord
to me a sinner; and if you deem it proper to be
brought before the public in any shape, the only
object I would have in view, is the good of my fellow
sinners, particularly such as have been, or are,
in situations of life, similar to those I have been
in, or have experienced similar exercises of mind.
Into the minutia of my early life, I do not intend
to enter; and I would make this general remark
in the outset, that my chief object is, to give
a history of the workings of my mind, during the
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past part of my life, rather than the particulars of
my life itself; but I shall narrate as much of these
particulars as is necessary to account for, and illustrate,
the history of my mind. I will also notice,
briefly, such other things as may serve to
entertain or inform the reader.
I was born in Glasgow, in the year 1779.--When
I was very young, the belief of the omniscience
of God, was frequently strongly impressed
upon my mind, and the thought of his all-seeing
eye, often checked my conscience and restrained
me during early life, from gratifying my own inclinations,
to the extent I otherwise would have
done. I pretty early learned to read; and as I
grew older I became increasingly fond of it, even
indeed to excess. I read whatever came in my
way; but the Psalms of David in metre, in use by
the church of Scotland, and the Bible, being the
first books in which I learned to read, and having
the benefit of godly instruction and example at
home, religious knowledge was that with which I
was most acquainted. When I was about eleven
years of age, I went to the Sabbath school, belonging
to the Outer High Church parish, Glasgow,
then taught by Mr. Begg, (now minister of New
Monkland parish,) and superintended by the parish
minister, the late Rev. Dr. Balfour. The chief
exercises of the school were, reading the Scriptures,
and repeating the Assembly's Shorter Catechism.
Dr. Balfour frequently visited the school,
after the afternoon's service was over, and staid
sometimes an hour, and sometimes even to the
conclusion at six o'clock. When the Catechism
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was repeated, he interrogated us on the meaning of
the questions, and instructed us in their import.
He questioned us upon the sermons we had been
hearing, and gave us doctrines to prove from scripture,
by collecting all the passages, that we thought
contained these doctrines. The doctrines were
the fundamental articles of the Christian religion;
and as we read the passages, he would tell us
when they were in point, and when not. I was
an adept at repeating the Catechism; but as I had
no margin Bible to point out the references, I had
to range through the whole scriptures, and exercise
my judgment, which of course was sometimes
right, and sometimes wrong. When I was shown
that I had brought forward a passage that did not
apply, it made me think better next time; the passages
I found out I remembered where to find
again; and those that were brought forward by
others, I added to my own stock. This was an
exercise that did me more good, than all the other
exercises of the school: for, in after life, when I
had forgotten the Catechism, and the other things
I had committed to memory, I did not forget how
to find in the Bible, those passages I had formerly
known; and if I happened to be reading the Bible,
and came to any of those passages that had been
read in the school, it awakened in my mind the
remembrance of what had taken place there. I
would then recollect something of the impressions
that had been made at the time on my mind, and
endeavoured to remember what was said by the
minister on these occasions; but I shall notice this
again; in a future part of the narrative. There
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were rewards sometimes given to any who repeated
chapters, psalms, or hymns. The most remarkable
instance of this kind that took place
while I was in the school, was a present by a gentleman,
of Doddridge's Rise and Progress of Religion
in the Soul, and Sermons to Young Persons,[#]
to be given as a reward to the boy (it was a school
for boys only) who repeated best, from memory,
Dr. Watts' Divine Songs for Children. We received
copies of the hymns, and a time was fixed
for the trial. I was very eager to obtain the prize,
and even made it a matter of prayer. I wished
to have the book, because I had conceived to myself,
that it would teach me how to get to heaven.
When the day of trial came, the minister was not
present, but we were heard by one of the elders.
The greater part of the children were very young,
and most of them had learned only a few of the
hymns. There were only four that could go any
length in them, and only three that could go completely
through them; and their merit was so equal,
that it could not be said which was best. I was
one of those three; but as it could not be determined
who merited the book, it was deferred until
next Sabbath evening, when it was expected that
the minister would be present. He came, and we
repeated the hymns to him with such equal accuracy,
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that he declared he could not give the prize
to one more than another; and to make us equal,
he procured other two copies of Doddridge's Rise
and Progress; but, as he could not find copies of
his Sermons to Young Persons, he bound in Boston's
Fourfold State in their place, and I was put
in possession of one of them.
I continued in the school about two years.
In 1796, being about the age of seventeen, I
enlisted as a soldier in the 100th regiment of foot,
or Gordon Highlanders, commanded by the Marquis
of Huntly,[#] then lying in the island of Corsica.
When that island was evacuated by the
British, the regiment came to Gibraltar, and I,
along with the rest of the recruits, left Scotland
and went to Chatham, where we joined other parties
of recruits belonging to regiments lying in Gibraltar,
for which place we embarked at Gravesend,
in Nov. 1796. But the convoy with which we
sailed, was forced, by stormy weather, to take
shelter in Falmouth for six weeks; after which
we proceeded to Lisbon, where we lay ten weeks,
because the Spanish fleet was at sea, and ours
inferior in number, was watching it. The battle
of Cape St. Vincent, was fought while we lay there,
in which the Spanish fleet was defeated, and four
sail of the line taken, which were sent into Lisbon.
The British fleet soon followed, except a squadron
left to watch the Spanish fleet in Cadiz. As soon
as the fleet had repaired its damages, it set sail
for Cadiz, and we went along with it for protection.
// File: 016.png
We left them when we came off Cadiz, and
were escorted by some frigates, through the straits
to Gibraltar, where we landed in the beginning of
April, 1797, and joined the regiment.
The general character of the army, for the profanation
of God's holy name, is well known: and
the temptations a young man has to encounter,
from the very general practice of this vice, are
very great. The religious instructions I had received,
and the knowledge I had of the Scriptures,
deterred me from acquiring a habit of swearing:
I frequently reproved my comrades for it; and
having done so, pride of heart also operated to prevent
me from swearing myself, lest my comrades
should, in ridicule, retort my reproofs upon me;
and this they did not fail to do, if at any time I
was guilty of an oath, or any thing approaching to
it.
During the time I had been a recruit, and the
time I was in Gibraltar, I neglected the reading of
the scriptures. In the regiment, I met with a variety
of characters; amongst others with Deists,
who attempted to shake my belief of the truth of
the scriptures. I was greatly disturbed and perplexed
in my mind by their arguments; but I was
not drawn into their opinions. Yet I still neglected
my Bible, and continued gradually losing the
knowledge of it I formerly had. There was an
argument, which had a powerful effect upon my
conscience, and with which I met all the pleas and
excuses for swearing;--I argued, that if there was
no God, it was an absurd thing to swear by the
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name of a being who had no existence: and if
there were a God, he certainly would punish the
dishonour done to him, by the profanation of his
name.
There was a society of Methodists in Gibraltar,
chiefly composed of men belonging to the different
regiments in the garrison. They had a small place,
where they had stated meetings for prayer and exhortation;
there were a few of these Methodists in
our regiment. Shortly after I joined it, the commanding
officer gave out an order for none of the
regiment to attend any of their meetings. What
effect this order had in deterring any from attending
at the time it was issued, I know not: it had
not at least a permanent effect, for I know that several
did attend afterwards, and no notice was
taken of it. I went to this meeting place only
once all the time I was in Gibraltar, and I was
nearly a twelvemonth in the place. This shows
what a careless state of mind I was in; for I may
say it was the only religious exercise I was at, all
that time. There were indeed prayers read to the
garrison, every Sunday morning on the grand parade,
when the weather was dry; but the chaplain
was always at such a distance, that I never heard
a word he said. There was a chapel at the governor's
residence, where service was performed
through the day, but I never was in it.
I began to fall into company which led me frequently
to get intoxicated; I did not indeed fall
into a habit, nor acquire an inclination for intoxicating
liquors for their own sake; but had the same
circumstances continued, I have great reason to
// File: 018.png
fear, that an appetite for them would have been
formed, and that I might have turned out a habitual
drunkard. Gibraltar has, indeed, peculiar
temptations to produce a habit of drunkenness.
The wine is cheap; the place is warm; and in
time of war with Spain, there is very little fresh
provisions, and what is fresh, is very indifferent.
There is a great deal of hard labour for the soldiers,
for part of which they get extra pay: by the
evening, many of them are fatigued, and actually
need a refreshment beyond their ordinary provisions;
but those who need the refreshment, are not
content to go and get what they require for themselves;
they often take one or two of their comrades
with them, and having once sat down in the
wine-house, they generally sit until either their
money is exhausted, or their time; (for the moment
the gun fires for the men to be in their barracks,
the wine-houses must be emptied and shut,
until after the new guards are marched away to
relieve the old ones next morning, that no soldier
may have it in his power to get drunk before guard
mounting.) Those who are treated one night,
treat in their turn those who treated them, when
they get pay for work.
Many of the barrack-rooms are uncomfortable
on account of their size, containing sixty or more
men. This greatly destroys social comfort: for
one or two individuals can molest all the rest; so
that select retired conversation can not be enjoyed.
Any thing of that kind is always ready to be interrupted
by the vicious and ignorant, who do not
fail to scoff and gibe at what they do not understand
// File: 019.png
or relish themselves. Among so many men
too, there will always be found some who take a
malicious pleasure in making their neighbours unhappy.
This renders the barrack-room quite uncomfortable
during the evening; which, as the
greater part are employed at work, or otherwise
occupied during the day, is the principal time
when they can be together. This, along with
other things, induces those who have a little money,
to spend the evening in the wine-house with
their more select companions. Different sorts of
vermin are very plenty in the barracks; and it is
a common excuse for drinking, that they can not
get a sound sleep, unless they be half drunk. It
was customary at that time to settle the men's accounts
once in two months; and, as very little pay
was given to the soldiers over their rations during
the intervals, the greater part had a considerable
sum to receive: and then drinking was so very
common, that to prevent a multiplicity of punishments,
it was found necessary to have no parade,
excepting those for guard, in order that the money
might be the sooner done; and the different regiments
in the garrison, had to take different days to
settle their men's accounts, that the garrison might
not be involved in one general state of intoxication
at the same time. But I hear that matters are
differently managed now; the men are oftener settled
with, and get a larger proportion of their pay
weekly, which prevents them from having so much
money to receive at once. The most comfortable
time I had, was when I was upon guard. There
are many very retired guard stations; some of them
// File: 020.png
in elevated situations, on the very summit of the
rock, 1300 feet above the level of the sea, from
which the view is truly grand, and where a fine
opportunity is afforded for meditation. I sometimes
took my Bible to guard with me, but I never
made much use of it.
We left Gibraltar, and embarked for England
in the beginning of March, and landed at Portsmouth,
18th May, 1798, and went into Hilsea
barracks. During the voyage I read something
more in my Bible, but much more still in any
other book I could find; sometimes it was a novel,
sometimes a history or play: sometimes it was a
book of a religious cast; but this was rare: I read
any thing I could get, to the neglect of the Bible.
.fn #
I have learned since the publication of the first edition,
that these Books were the gift of Mr. Auchincloss, a gentleman
who took a very lively interest in the Sabbath
schools. He was constantly employed in visiting them, and
in giving rewards of various kinds to those who behaved
well, and repeated, from memory, psalms or chapters.
.fn-
.fn #
The number of the regiment was afterwards changed
to the 92d, which is the number of it at present.
.fn-
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap2
CHAPTER II.
.sp 2
We embarked in the beginning of June for Ireland,
on board of the Europa of 60, and the Van
Tromp of 54 guns. We had a narrow escape
from running ashore amongst the rocks, in a fog,
upon the Irish coast: the fog, however, cleared
away just in time for us to see our danger. A new
scene began to open to us: Ireland was in a state
of insurrection; and we were but ill informed of the
nature and extent of it. We were told by a pilot,
that we got upon the coast to conduct us into Dublin,
that the insurgents had taken Wexford. The
prospect of being engaged in a civil war, made me
thoughtful, and agitated me not a little. On the
// File: 021.png
18th June we anchored in Dublin bay, and landed
at the Pigeon-house in the evening. We were
here met by Lord Huntly, our Colonel, who had
been made a Brigadier General on the Irish staff.
We remained on the mole near the Pigeon-house,
which is about three miles from Dublin, until day-break
next morning, and then marched into the
city with drums beating and colours flying, announcing
to the sleeping inhabitants, at the early
hour of three o'clock, the arrival of fresh troops
for the support of the government.
As we now entered into a scene of civil war, I
will take the liberty of stating a few of the particulars
of the Irish insurrection.
The city of Dublin was under strict police:
patrols of cavalry paraded the streets during the
day to prevent crowds from assembling. Numerous
and strong guards were posted through the city
and suburbs, and upon all the roads leading to the
country. These guards were reinforced at night
with additional garrison troops, and large parties
of volunteer yeomanry, both horse and foot. Many
citizens of the first respectability, and not a few of
the nobility, were in the ranks of the yeomanry;
and it was not an uncommon thing for a poor
Highlander to have a wealthy citizen, or noble
lord, posted along with him on sentry. All the
inhabitants were ordered to be in their own houses
by a set time at night. Strong patrols then scoured
the streets and made prisoners of all they found
upon them, and entered every house where they
heard any disturbance. Every house had a written
list of the inmates upon the door, and was
// File: 022.png
liable to be visited during the night; and if any
one was amissing, the owner might be taken up;
or if any were in the house whose names were not
on the door, or if any one was found in his neighbour's
house, he was taken up and fined before
being set at liberty. Every precaution was used,
to prevent plots from being formed, and all means
was used to find them out. In such a state of society,
opportunity is afforded to private malice and
ill-will, to injure the objects of their enmity.
When I was upon the Grand Barrack guard, two
respectable old citizens were brought in prisoners.
They were men who were unfit, and very unlikely
to have any active hand in conspiracy against
the state. They were confined in the guard-room
all that day and night; whether they were liberated
next day after I was relieved, or removed to
some other place, I know not. While they were
in the guard-room, they were exposed to the interrogatories
of the ignorant and unthinking, who
took every such prisoner to be an insurgent. They
were protected, however, by the interposition of
the more intelligent and humane. I had a little
conversation with them, and they told me it was
their belief, that it was an apprentice of theirs with
whom they had a difference on account of bad behaviour,
who had, out of revenge, given false accusation
against them; such as, that they were
holding correspondence with the insurgents in the
country, &c. They told me that such cases were
frequent. Every person accused was taken up,
and kept until the case should be examined: and
as this, from the great number daily apprehended,
// File: 023.png
could not be instantly done, individuals often suffered
seriously, before they obtained their release.
The conduct of persons, whose political sentiments
or behaviour, were in any measure suspicious,
was closely watched. And when they were
found transgressing any of the police rules, their
cases were strictly examined. I saw an instance
of this, in the case of a respectable gentleman,
who was confined in the same guard-room upon
another day. He had been found out of his own
house after the appointed time at night. He pled
that he was only a short time in a neighbour's
house: and that the person in whose house he was,
was himself a very loyal man, and a yeoman. He
said he had always been a very loyal man himself.
He acknowledged, that at a certain public meeting,
(which had taken place some time previous to
this) where a certain political question had been
discussed, he had spoken warmly, too warmly;
but that that was the only thing in the course of
his life, that could have any tendency to create
any suspicion of his loyalty. He remained in the
common guard-room during the day, and was removed
to another place at night. He was liberated
next morning when I saw him, and he told me,
that nothing farther than his being out of his own
house at night was brought against him; and that
he had gotten his liberty on condition of paying ten
pounds to the fund for the relief of the widows and
children of soldiers who had fallen in the insurrection.
He said that he happened to have as much
money upon him, and that he paid it cheerfully; for
those that were to get it well deserved it. I mention
// File: 024.png
these cases as certain evils arising out of a state
of civil war.
During the time we lay in Dublin, the insurrection
was raging in various parts of the country, and
much blood was shedding. Dublin itself was kept in
a state of tranquillity, by the vigilance of the police,
and the power of the military. Our stay in it was
short. On the 1st of July, the volunteer cavalry were
employed in going through the city, pressing all
the coaches, gigs, and other vehicles, and collecting
them in one of the squares. At six o'clock at
night we paraded, and went into them, and set off
for Arklow. We travelled all night. We were all
accommodated at the outset, but fell into considerable
confusion on the way, by some of the coachmen
getting drunk, and striving to get past one
another; which caused several of the carriages to
break down, and others, by running into ditches,
to upset. It was conjectured that some of the
coachmen did this wilfully, from aversion to the
service they were upon. Numbers had thus to
walk in the rain, which was heavy; and several
had their muskets damaged, by the breaking down
or upsetting of the carriages. One man had his
firelock completely bent; and when he was asked
by the people of the villages through which we
passed, what kind of a gun that was, he told them
it was one of a new construction, for the purpose of
shooting round corners.
As we advanced into the country, we began to
see the effects of the insurrection. Burnt houses began
to make their appearance in the villages, and
their number increased as we proceeded. The
// File: 025.png
coaches carried us to about three miles from Arklow,
and then returned to Dublin. We entered
Arklow in the evening. The place had been attacked
by a large body of insurgents a few days
before, who had been repulsed with great slaughter.
They had some pieces of artillery, with which
they had dismounted one of the guns of the military,
and damaged some of the houses. They had
also burnt that part of the town that lay next the
sea-side, which was composed of low thatched
houses, and was inhabited by fishermen. It was
a very pitiable sight to see this scene of destruction;
and those of my comrades who went to the
ground where the insurgents had stood during the
action, said it was disgusting. Numbers of dead
bodies were still unburied; some of them lying in
ditches, and the swine feeding on them. There
was a number of prisoners in the place, who had
been taken, whom they were trying by court-martial,
and hanging; but I was not an eye-witness to
any executions in this place. A part of the regiment
was stationed in the church, which was not
a large one. This was a new kind of quarters, but
every part was occupied, pulpit and all; and the
grave stones were the place where we cleaned our
arms.
The insurgents were still in a body upon one of
the hills in the vicinity, and kept the place in
alarm; and we had frequently to stand to our arms
during the night. On the fourth of July, we paraded
in the street at 12 o'clock at night, in great
haste. The right wing of the regiment got three
days bread served out, when we marched away in
// File: 026.png
a great hurry, without giving the left wing any. I
was in the left wing, and had only a few crumbs
left of that day's rations. We marched very
quickly through by-roads; and when day began to
break, we made a short pause, and loaded our
muskets,--the first time I had done so in the expectation
of fighting. There was a high hill before
us, (called White Heaps) whose top was covered
with mist, and that side which was next to us was
very steep. The insurgents were said to be on the
top of it. Their number, we afterwards learned,
was 5000; of whom 1500 had firelocks, the rest
pikes. There were about six troops of cavalry
along with us: but our whole number did not
amount to 1200, without artillery. We ascended
the hill with difficulty, without being perceived
by those on the top, the mist concealing us from
each other. When we had nearly reached the
summit, and had entered into the mist that covered
it, our front was challenged by the insurgent
sentinels, who demanded the countersign, to which
the Lieutenant Colonel replied, "You shall have
it in a minute." We moved a little further and
formed our line. The fog cleared up a little for a
minute, when we found that our left was near the
enemy, who were collecting themselves into three
bodies. The ground betwixt us and them was a
wet bog; and the commander of the cavalry told
our commanding officer, that if he advanced, the
cavalry would not be able to act in such marshy
ground as that before us. The fog again covered
us, so that we could not see them, and a gust of
wind, with a shower of rain, induced us to stand
// File: 027.png
still. The insurgents then gave a loud cheer, and
then a second, and they began a third; but it died
away, and was not so full or loud as the others.
We expected to be instantly attacked, as this was
their signal of attack. They, however, had imagined
that we were much stronger than what we
were; and being terrified by the suddenness of our
appearance, in place of coming forward to attack,
they fled in great haste down the opposite side of
the hill. We stood in uncertainty for some time,
as we could see nothing; then hearing the fire of
two guns, we moved in that direction, and got out of
the fog, and descended the hill on the side opposite
to that which we had ascended. We then learned
that the insurgents had gone down the hill; and,
having fallen in with another division of the army,
had come upon them before they could get fully
formed, and had come close to the guns, when they
were fired upon and repulsed. It had been arranged,
that different bodies of troops should have
mounted the hill on opposite sides at the same
time; but we had been sooner than the others,
which disarranged the plan. The insurgents continued
to fly, the cavalry went forward in pursuit,
and we followed with all possible haste. When
we reached the foot of the hill, I saw four of the
insurgents lying dead. We continued to march
with great haste, and frequently changed our route.
We heard firing at no great distance; but the parties
were always gone before we came up. The
road was strewed with old clothes, oatmeal, oat
bread, and dough, thrown away by the insurgents
in their flight. The dragoons killed a great number
// File: 028.png
of them in the fields. The insurgents, in their
flight, fell in with some baggage belonging to some
of the other divisions; attacked the guard, and
killed and wounded several, before the rest of the
army could come to their assistance; the insurgents
were then totally dispersed, and a great
many killed and wounded; but our regiment never
could arrive in time to take share in any of the
actions. Several women were among the dead,
who were shot in the ranks of the insurgents. We
had a most fatiguing march, of upwards of thirty
Irish miles. In the evening we arrived at the
town of Gorey, as did also two other divisions of
the army.
One thing I would particularly notice here, is
the ferocity of civil war; it has barbarities not now
practised in the national wars of Europe. In one
spot, where seven had fled to a house, in which
they were killed, their bodies had been brought out
to the road side, where they lay, shamefully uncovered,
and some of them mangled in a manner
too indelicate to mention. At another place, I saw
an insurgent, who had been taken and dragged by
the hair of his head, which was long, for some
distance along the road, and then shot through
the heart. It was said, he was unwilling to inform
upon the rest of the insurgents. Numerous
and shocking barbarities were committed on both
sides, sometimes originating in animosity, sometimes
in wanton cruelty, and at other times in retaliation.
I was witness to a scene of the latter kind a
few days after, in the town of Gorey. A man
// File: 029.png
was brought to the back of the camp, to be hanged
upon a tree on the road side, by a party of an
English fencible regiment. The man was scarcely
suspended, when the officer of the party fired the
contents of two pistols into the body, and then
drew his sword and ran it into it. I then turned
from the sight with disgust; but those of my comrades
who stayed, told me that the body was lowered
down from the tree upon the road; that the
soldiers of the party perforated it with their bayonets,
cut off the head, cut it in pieces, and threw
them about, tossing them in the air, calling out,
"Who will have this?" They then dug a hole on
the opposite side of the road, and buried the body
and the mangled pieces of the head, in the presence
of a few of the unhappy man's friends. I
was informed that he had been a judge in the insurgent
army for trying their prisoners: that a brother
of the officer of the party had been taken
prisoner by the insurgents, and had been sentenced
by this man to be piked to death: and that this
was the reason why he had been so used.
Piking to death was what the insurgents practised
upon those of the king's troops that fell into
their hands, particularly if they remained firm in
their allegiance. The common method was for
"two to stand behind, and two before the victim,
and thrust their pikes into his body at once, and
raise it from the ground, holding it suspended,
writhing with pain, while any signs of life appeared.
At other times, two men, with pikes, would
come before the victim, and begin to stab him in
the feet, and then the legs, and thighs, and belly,
// File: 030.png
until they reached the heart. At other times they
literally perforated the body all over, with pike
wounds." Such barbarities could not fail to produce
desire of revenge. But, as our regiment had
not been in the country during the out-breaking of
the insurrection, we had received no injury to provoke
our resentment. And as we had not been
employed in the execution of any of the rigorous
measures resorted to by the government to prevent
the insurrection, no one had any ill will against
us. We were called into the service of suppressing
this unhappy and calamitous insurrection, after it
had begun to decline, and we were rather witnesses
of its ruinous and distressing effects, than
active hands in suppressing it by force. For it so
happened, that although we several times pursued
considerable bodies of the insurgents through the
mountains, and were at times pretty close upon
them, yet no one of us fired a musket, with the
exception of one or two, who did it without orders,
on the morning of the 5th July, on the White
Heaps: neither was a musket fired at us; and the
only loss the regiment sustained during this service,
occurred one morning when we were pursuing
a body of insurgents among the mountains.
One of our men having fallen behind through
weakness, was met by two or three insurgents in
women's clothes, carrying pails of milk on their
heads, as if returning from milking. They offered
him drink; and, while he was drinking, one of
them seized his musket, and after threatening to
kill him, they allowed him to proceed to the regiment,
with the loss of his musket and ammunition.
// File: 031.png
The sight of so many houses and villages, and
parts of towns, burned and destroyed, and the
great number of women and children, who were
in a destitute state, because their husbands and
fathers were either gone with the insurgents, or
were fled for safety, touched most powerfully the
sensibilities of our hearts, and diffused a feeling
of generous sympathy through the regiment. It so
happened at that time, that we had newly received
a more than ordinary balance of arrears of pay, so
that every man was in possession of money, less
or more; and although we were very fond of milk,
because we had been long living upon salt provisions,
before our arrival in Ireland, yet there were
none who would accept of a draught of milk for
nothing, but would pay its price. And if the people
of the house would not take payment, they
would give the value of what milk they received
to the children.
As this conduct in soldiers is more rare than
even conspicuous courage in the field, the truth of
what is here asserted, may be the more ready to
be questioned. I shall, therefore, take the liberty
of inserting a quotation from Gordon's History of
the Irish Rebellion. The author of that work is a
clergyman, whose residence appears to have been
in the vicinity of Gorey, and who had a personal
knowledge of what took place there at that time.
That author complains of the losses sustained by
the inhabitants from the insurgents and the soldiery:
he says, "on the arrival of the Marquis of
Huntly, however, with his regiment of Scottish
Highlanders, in Gorey, the scene was totally altered.
// File: 032.png
To the immortal honour of this regiment, its
behaviour was such, as, if it were universal among
soldiers, would render a military government
amiable. To the astonishment of the (until then
miserably harassed) peasantry, not the smallest
trifle, even a drink of butter milk, would any of
these Highlanders accept, without the payment of
at least the full value."--Gordon's History of the
Irish Rebellion, 2d edit Lond. p. 240.
When we entered the town of Gorey, it was, in
great part, deserted by the inhabitants. Nothing
was to be procured for money. After the very
fatiguing march we had on the day we entered it,
we received one biscuit and one glass of whiskey.
On the next day we marched to a considerable distance,
in quest of the insurgents, and returned
back; we got a draught of milk, and one day's
allowance of boiled beef, which had arrived from
Arklow; but no bread.--The day was very warm,
and I was considerably exhausted. That day
passed over, and the next day, until the evening,
without any word of any more provisions. The
dread of having to pass another night in our present
hungry state, determined other two and myself,
to go in quest of something that we could eat.
We saw some who had purchased some old potatoes
at the mill of the place. We made all haste
to the mill; but the potatoes were all sold. We
felt disappointed; but, observing that the mill was
at work, we entered it to see what was grinding.
We found a man attending the mill, who said he
was not the miller, but had just set the mill to
work to grind some barley. There were but a few
// File: 033.png
handfuls ground; and we resolved, rather than
want, that we would wait until some greater quantity
was done, when we would endeavour to get it
cleaned, so as to be capable of being turned into
food. After stopping a few seconds in the mill, I
began to look about, when I perceived a number
of sacks that were, less or more, filled with something:
I said to my comrades, "Perhaps there may
be something in some of these sacks that will
serve us: we had better examine them and see."
We were indeed loath to touch any thing; but we
were in absolute want of food, and were willing to
pay for it. Observing a sack about half full, standing
beneath another that was full, and was bent
over it, we thought we would see what was in the
broken sack first. We instantly removed the full
sack, and, to our great joy, we found the other was
about half full of excellent oatmeal, ready for use.
The miller's wife came in, in great agitation, and
said, that she durst not sell it, for it belonged to a
gentleman in the neighbourhood, who was a Captain
of the Yeomen. I replied, that we were in
absolute need, and must have it; but that we would
pay a fair market price for it, which she could
give to the gentleman who owned the meal; that
he would likely be able to procure a supply to
himself elsewhere; that he perhaps was not in the
immediate want of it, but that we were, and did
not know any where else to find it; and that she
might state this to the owner, and that would remove
all blame from her. She assented to the
justice of this; and said, that one shilling and six-pence
was a fair price for the stone weight. The
// File: 034.png
weights were quickly erected; we weighed a stone,
paid the price, and set out to get it cooked, leaving
a number more of our comrades, who had come
to the mill, to be supplied in the same way as we
had been. While passing along the street, looking
for an inhabited house, where we might get our
meal cooked, we met other three of our comrades,
who had gone to the country in quest of provisions,
but could get nothing but milk, of which they had
their canteens full. We agreed that we would
give them a share of our meal for a share of their
milk. We then went into a house, in which was
a woman with one child. She said her husband
was a blacksmith, and that the insurgents had
forced him to go with them, to forge their pikes.[#]
We told her that we wanted her to make us some
porridge, and that she should get a share of it
for her trouble. She instantly cleaned her pot,
(which was but a small one,) and got it on the
fire. We procured some wood for fuel; and, the
first pot full being soon made, and poured into a dish
to cool, we desired her to make haste and get the
second ready, for we were very hungry, and what
was in the dish would do little to fill us: we then
sat down, all six, to satisfy our hunger. What was
in the dish would have been a very scanty meal
for three; yet, after we had eagerly swallowed a
few spoonfuls, we began to slacken our speed, and
(although the milk and porridge were exceedingly
good) to swallow them slowly, and with difficulty;
// File: 035.png
and we were all reluctantly compelled to
leave off before our little mess was nearly finished,
and the poor woman got the remains, and the
second pot full for her trouble. We told her, that
we would call back next day after parade, to get
another meal. On returning to our quarters, we
found that our provisions had arrived in our absence;
but as we could not know that they were
to arrive that night, we felt satisfied with what we
had done. We did call back at our cook's next
day; and, after taking a little more porridge, desired
her to make use of the rest of that meal as
she needed it, for that we had now got plenty of
other provision, and were not likely to require it.
The town and adjacent country were in a most
distressing state. Numbers of the cattle were
going through the corn-fields, and destroying
more than they were eating. The milk-cows
were lowing most piteously for want of being
milked. And as the town had been more than
once in the hands of the insurgents, the alternate
movements of the army and the insurgents created
always fresh alarm to the peaceable and helpless,
who were liable to suffer by every change. The
insurgents harassed those who did not join with
them; and when the insurgents had to fly, the
soldiers harassed those whom they found at home,
on pretence that they were friends or favourers of
the insurgents: so that it was next to impossible,
for even those who were unable to take any part
on either side, to escape being involved in the distresses
attendant on the quarrel.
The following circumstance will in part show
// File: 036.png
this. Three of our men went from Gorey, to the
country, in quest of provisions; (I think it was the
same three that gave us milk formerly.) They
went to a farm house, into which they entered,
but could find no one within. They went through
all the apartments, but could discover no one.
They saw that the fire was unextinguished; the
milk, and every thing about the house, showed
that the inhabitants could not be far away. When
they had waited a good while, in the hope that
some of them might make their appearance, a
young child came into the house. This convinced
them that the mother could not be far off. They
spoke kindly to the child, and gave it a penny. It
then left them, and in a short time reappeared
with its mother and the rest of the women and
children belonging to the house. The soldiers told
them that they wanted to buy some milk; to which
they replied, that they might take whatever they
wanted, and welcome. The soldiers said, they did
not want any thing for nothing, but would pay for
what they got; but the women insisted that they
should take freely what they wanted, and said,
that was not the way they had been used by the
soldiers that had visited them before, for they took
what they wanted without asking their liberty,
and sometimes ill used themselves; adding, "We
saw you coming, and we were afraid, and went
and hid ourselves; but when the child came into
our hiding-place, and showed us a penny it had
got from you, this encouraged us to make our appearance;
and God bless you, take what you want
freely." The soldiers got their canteens filled
// File: 037.png
with milk, but the inhabitants had no other provisions
that they could spare. They then left them,
(after giving the children as many pence as they
thought the milk was worth,) highly pleased with
their visit.
We stayed in the town of Gorey a fortnight,
during which time public confidence was greatly
restored. The bulk of the inhabitants had returned,
and the grocers' shops began to be replenished.
There was no whiskey, or drink of any kind, to
be had when we entered it; but whiskey was distilled
and sold some days previous to our departure,
which consumed the soldiers' money much
faster than the buying of milk did, although the
milk was by far the preferable article, had they
been so wise as to have contented themselves with
it. We left Gorey, and had two days march to
Blessington, twelve miles from Dublin. Our route
led us through a part of the country that had suffered
severely. Almost every change of landscape
presented to our view the roofless walls of cabins
and of gentlemen's country seats, many of which
were spacious and elegant. The populous village
of Carnew, where we halted for a night, had been
almost totally burnt. The inhabitants had sheltered
themselves within the walls of their cabins
the best way they could; but, in wet weather, their
condition was pitiful. A great part of the town of
Blessington had also been destroyed. We pitched
our tents in the rear of the Marquis of Downshire's
fine house, which had also been burnt. A large
body of military was encamped in the pleasure
grounds, and great openings were made in the
// File: 038.png
walls and hedges to admit of a ready communication
between the different parts of the camp, and
every thing was in a ruinous state. We were here
put under the orders of Sir John Moore, then a
Major General, and in a few days he marched
with our regiment, and the Hompesch dragoons,
and two pieces of artillery, and encamped in the
glen of Eimal, among the mountains of Wicklow;
where several detached bodies of insurgents were
still in arms. When we entered the glen, which
was a fruitful valley of considerable extent, the
inhabitants kept their houses, because some of the
military, who had been there before us, had spread
a report that we were uncommonly ferocious. But
this impression was of short duration; we were
soon great favourites with them, and our camp
became a place of public resort, particularly upon
Sundays. The young men and women were entertained
with whiskey, music, and dancing; to
which exercise they were encouraged by the attendance
and approbation of a neighbouring Catholic
priest, who excited the young women to dance
with the military, even with very profane language.
This drew forth the remarks of the soldiers;
and even the most openly profane among
them condemned their own sins when committed
by a priest.--A circumstance of a different kind
took place here, which was remarked as uncommon
among us. Two of the soldiers quarrelled,
and had a long vociferous wrangle, consisting
chiefly in profane oaths and curses. They were
not far from the Major's tent; (the Major was a
Catholic;) he was so disgusted at the horrid profanity
// File: 039.png
of their language, that he ordered them extra
drill, as a punishment, and complained to Lord
Huntly, who gave out an order prohibiting the
practice, and threatening to put the Articles of
War in force, and to fine every man in a shilling
for every oath. This was a temporary check to
the very public commission of it, but it was only
of short duration; for the practice was too general
among all ranks, and the order was soon as if it
had never been.
While we lay in this camp, Sir John Moore
marched twice with us into the interior of the
mountains, where the insurgents still kept in small
bodies. They made a show of resistance, but fled
when we got near them. We pursued them slowly;
Sir John did not allow any to fire at them, though
it might, at times, have been done. It appeared
to be his intention to intimidate them from remaining
in arms, and by showing them forbearance, to
induce them to return to their allegiance. This
wise conduct of the general, along with the conciliatory
behaviour of the soldiers, had a happy
effect. For, during the time that we were encamped
here, the greater part of them came in and
delivered up their arms. The whole would have
submitted in the course of a day or two, if the
French had not landed at Killala. It was said,
that the only remaining leaders were in the camp,
and had left it to fetch in their followers the next
day; but that the report of the French having
landed[#] reaching them in the evening, revived
// File: 040.png
their hopes of a revolution: and, our marching
suddenly away next morning to oppose the French,
confirmed them in the belief that they were in
great force. In consequence of this, they remained
in arms during the autumn and winter, committing
petty depredations, and skulking among
the mountains. It was lamentable to see the ignorance
of the people who had been in arms. They
were indeed no judges of political questions. Petty
local animosity, and an aversion to Protestants,
was all that operated with the great body of them;
and beyond these, they could not be made to look
by those who saw farther.
Their bigotry to the Romish religion was so
strong, that although their oaths, as united Irishmen,
bound them to "persevere in endeavouring
to form a brotherhood of affection among Irishmen
of every religious persuasion," they were no sooner
up in arms, than they began to show that Protestants
would not be tolerated. They put many
Protestants to death, in the most cruel manner,
some of whom were fighting in their own ranks. And
had they succeeded in overturning the government,
they would not have spared even those Protestant
gentlemen that were their chief leaders, nor yet
those of their own communion that were favourers
of toleration. Their secular leaders, whether
Protestant or Catholic, were soon convinced, that
because they did not approve of intolerance, their
lives would fall a sacrifice to their own party if it
was successful. They preferred surrendering themselves
to the clemency of the government, as soon
as it was in their power, to staying among the insurgents;
// File: 041.png
for, although they had forfeited their
lives by their insurrection, they had a greater
chance of being spared by the clemency of the
government, than of escaping the bigotry of those
whom they themselves had stirred up to rise in
arms against it. One Garret Byrne, a Roman
Catholic gentleman, of landed property, surrendered
after the affair of the White Heaps, and was
sent to our camp, and was employed by Sir John
Moore to guide us through the mountains, when we
went in pursuit of the insurgents.
Disaffection had spread among the Protestants
of the north, as well as among the Papists of the
south; but, as soon as the Protestants in the north
heard that the insurrection had taken a religious
turn in the south, they were glad to be quiet, for
they instantly saw that their safety (they being by
far the fewer number) lay in the preservation of
the government. This freed the government from
the resistance of the Protestant insurgents of the
north; who, from the superiority of their intelligence,
were more to be dreaded than the Catholics
of the south. Want of subordination in the
insurgent armies, also, contributed materially to
render the insurrection abortive. Their notions
of liberty, for which they ignorantly pretended to
be fighting, were of such a nature as to render
every attempt to train them to arms utterly vain.
They said, we are the sovereign people--we are
free--we will not be drilled like those slaves of
government, the red coats. To be drilled like a
soldier was a degree of subordination which they
had never been subject to; and, when they had
// File: 042.png
been persuaded by those who stirred them up to
insurrection, that they were slaves, and that they
would obtain freedom by rising in arms, they could
not see the consistency of this, with submitting to
the slavery of being drilled like soldiers. Indeed,
their actions showed that the liberty for which they
were fighting, was a liberty to violate the laws of
God and man, and indulge in licentiousness, riot,
and dissipation, and the cruelties of superstition.
We had a long fatiguing march to the opposite
coast of Ireland. We never came in contact with
the French, but we were extremely glad when we
heard of their surrender, as we were weary with
hard marching. We escorted them as prisoners
one day's march; their number was then, of all
ranks, somewhat about 800. When they landed,
they were 1100, (Gordon's History of the Irish
Rebellion, p. 294.) There were several amongst
them who had been prisoners in Corsica when our
regiment was there, and they recognised some of
our men as having been guards over them there.
They had brought a large quantity of arms,
accoutrements, and clothing from France, to equip
the Irish insurgents, many of whom had joined
them after they had taken the town of Castlebar;
but the major part left them, and went away with
the arms, accoutrements, and clothing they had
received, as soon as the French began to drill
them. Muskets had been given to five thousand
five hundred in Castlebar, but there were only
about fifteen hundred that accompanied the French
on their march from that place to Ballinamuck,
where the French surrendered, when 500 of them
// File: 043.png
were killed, and the rest dispersed. They were
also dangerous as well as useless allies to the
French; for they were not disposed to give quarter
to prisoners. I heard of an instance of an insurgent
who killed a soldier that had been taken prisoner:
one of the French cavalry instantly cut the
insurgent down with his sword. This restraint did
not suit the sanguinary temper of the insurgents;
but the French well knew that if their allies did
not give quarter, no quarter would be given to
them. The alliance was also very incongruous;
for the insurgents were all bigotted Catholics, and
the French enthusiastic infidels, who openly boasted
that they had lately driven Mr. Pope out of Italy,
and had not expected to find him so suddenly in
Ireland. They smiled at the simplicity of the
Irish, when they heard them declare that they
came to take arms for France and the blessed
Virgin. The priests were treated with the utmost
contempt by the French general, although it was
his interest to have acted otherwise. There can
be no doubt that, although the French had succeeded
in revolutionizing Ireland, their religious
difference would have produced a new war between
them and the Irish.
We did not return to the Wicklow mountains;
but encamped during the autumn at Moat, twelve
miles from Athlone, which is near the centre of
Ireland; and, when winter set in, we went into
Athlone for winter quarters. The number of the
regiment was changed at this time from the 100th
to the 92d.
We lay there from the end of October, 1798,
// File: 044.png
to June, 1799. In this place it pleased God to
lead my mind to serious and deep reflection, and
to begin a work of sharp conviction, such as I had
never before experienced. There was a Catholic
Chapel, an English Church, and a Wesleyan Methodist
Meeting-house in the town. In the Methodist
Meeting-house, there were always public
prayers evening and morning, and sermon on the
Lord's day, and often twice a week in the evenings.
I attended the Meeting-house pretty closely,
and began to read my Bible with more than common
attention. I reviewed my past life, and found
that I was an exceeding great sinner in the sight
of God: and God's goodness as my Creator, and
merciful Preserver, appeared to my view in a
much stronger light than ever it had done before.
I read several religious books, amongst which were
Baxter's Call to the Unconverted, and Young's
Night Thoughts. The subject of life, death, and
immortality, occupied my thoughts very much; the
conviction of my ingratitude, in sinning against
God, often made me weep in secret; and the fear
of falling into the hands of a justly offended God,
frequently made me shudder. The words of Scripture,
"Repent and turn to the Lord," were
strongly impressed upon my mind. I saw there
was no salvation without pardon, and no pardon
without repentance. I wept for my sins, and
earnestly besought God to forgive them. I read the
Scriptures, and found, as I imagined, pardon promised
to the penitent. I followed, as far as circumstances
permitted, in point of form, Baxter's
directions. I devoted myself to God, and vowed
// File: 045.png
to forsake sin, and to live a godly life for the future.
I made this resolution in sincerity of heart,
my understanding being convinced that it was my
duty to hate sin, because God hated it; and that if
I regarded sin in my heart, God would not hear
my prayers, nor pardon my transgressions. I then
began to attempt the performance of what I saw
was my duty. I began to hunger and thirst after
personal holiness; but of the nature of justification,
by faith in the imputed righteousness of Christ, I
had no conception; and of the nature and design
of his sufferings, my ideas were very confused and
erroneous. It was a sense of sin that pained my
conscience, and I sought for relief in personal reformation,
and founded my hope of pardon for the
past, and of eternal life, in the success of the reformation,
I had now commenced. Being convinced
that I was liable to many and strong temptations,
and that the conquest of sin would be no
easy work, I conceived that it was my wisdom, as
well as duty, to have recourse to every thing that
could strengthen me against temptation, and assist
me in the arduous task of working out what I conceived
to be my salvation.
When under this temper of mind, I happened,
with a number of other soldiers of the regiment, to
be at the meeting-house one evening; and after
the ordinary service of praise and prayer was over,
the preacher desired the soldiers to remain, intimating
that he had something to say to us. He
then addressed us, on the propriety of joining in a
class meeting, informing us how many soldiers had
joined in a class meeting, in a neighbouring town,
// File: 046.png
in his circuit. He said that some of us might
scruple, because he was not of the same religious
principles as those we had been brought up in.
This might be true; but he remarked that we had
no opportunity of joining with those, who were of
the principles in which we might have been educated,
there being none in the place; that, if we
chose to form a class meeting, he did not require
that we should be of the same principles with him
in every thing; but that if we were concerned for
the salvation of our souls, it would be for our benefit,
while we were absent from home, to be united
together, for the purpose of social worship and
instruction.--I thought the proposal candid and
reasonable, and put down my name, as one willing
to join in a class meeting. I thought it would
be a means of helping me in the work of personal
reformation. For a short time I went on pretty
well in my own estimation, abstaining from any
thing that was open and flagrant; but secret sins
overcame me, although I had set myself to resist
them with all my might; and this broke my peace
of mind. It happened, that there were a number
of the regiment, and amongst them some of my
own comrades, taken ill with dysentery; and several
died of the disorder. This alarmed me
much. I began more seriously than ever, to contemplate
the uncertainty of life. I read seriously,
and with great attention, those portions of Young's
Night Thoughts that treat on that subject. I entered
fully into the spirit of the poet, and applied
to my conscience his reflections. My security of
life was completely broken. Every night I lay
// File: 047.png
down to sleep, I was afraid I might never awake,
and every morning I arose, I was afraid I might
die before night. I would say to myself in the
morning, "Some of my fellow creatures, who are
living at this moment, will be dead before night;
and how can I tell but I may be one of them!"
This subject never made so strong an impression
on my mind as at this time. I never was so much
afraid of death, except on occasions of evident danger.
I could no longer place death at a distance.
I saw myself in danger of being snatched away
every moment in numberless ways, and put the
question to myself, "Were I to die this moment,
what hope have I of escaping hell and getting to
heaven?" and I concluded, that I had no hope of
heaven whatever, but every reason to fear that
hell should be my portion.
I then began to look around me; and compare
myself with the bulk of my comrades. I thought
I was not so bad as they were. I began to reason
with myself, that if God was to send me to hell for
my sins, surely those that were worse than I was,
would also be condemned; and, if that was the
case, how few would there be that would escape!
I would fondly have indulged the idea, that surely
God would not be so severe, as to condemn so
many, and would fain have cherished the hope, that
because I was not so bad as the major part of those
I knew, I should have a chance to escape. But
when I reviewed my past life in the light of the
word of God, I found nothing but condemnation;
for I perceived that that word took cognisance of
the quality of sin, as well as the quantity, and condemned
// File: 048.png
both sins secret and sins open: I began to
remember the means that I had enjoyed above
others, of religious instruction and information;
and the declaration of our Lord, "To whom much
is given, of them shall much be required," rang
in my ears. I remembered the impressions made
upon my mind by early religious instructions; I
recollected the resolutions I had made to forsake
sin, and the convictions which had produced these
resolutions; I thought of my breaches of these resolutions,
and my former forgetfulness and indifference:
and more particularly, my failing in
keeping my last most solemn vow. I began to
meditate and consider of God's dealings with me
as an individual: and of the account he would require
of me as an individual sinner. I no longer
durst compare myself with other men. I knew
not the extent, in number and heinousness, of any
other man's sins. I knew not their secret sins and
evil purposes of heart; and as God would bring all
manner of sin into judgment, I durst no longer
think in my heart that I was a whit better than
the most wicked and profane person I knew; for I
knew more evil of myself than I had known, or
could know of another. This led me to look
more strictly into my own heart, and to examine
what was done in it, as I found that the word of
God discerned the thoughts of the heart. This
led me to investigate the motives of my actions,
and then I found that I did nothing that was pure.
I called to mind the past goodness of God, the
many mercies and deliverances he had given me;
I reflected on my ungrateful behaviour, and was
// File: 049.png
filled with wonder and astonishment that a God of
such awful majesty, should have spared such an
ungrateful and vile wretch so long; I was led afresh
to consider, "What shall I do to escape the just
vengeance of Almighty God?" and my resolution
was to repent afresh of my sins, and devote my
future life, with greater resolution to his glory. I
durst not delay my repentance to a more convenient
time, because the fear of death stared me in
the face; and I was convinced, that as death left
me, judgment would find me. I trembled at the
thought of being called, by death, before the awful
tribunal of God. I had nothing to look to on the
one hand, but a broken law; and a holy, sin-avenging
God on the other. This made me earnestly
wish for the pardon of my sins, and I resolved
that I would do any thing whatever that would
procure it.
I read the Scriptures, but chiefly in the Old
Testament, often in Isaiah. To the clearer light
of the New Testament, I did not so much attend.
Its clear evangelical language did not strike my
mind with that force as to fix my attention upon
it. From those parts of the Scripture that
caught my attention, I formed the following
opinions:--that God promised mercy to the penitent
returning sinner: this gave me a gleam of
hope, which I believe prevented me from sinking
into absolute despair; but I did not understand the
nature of evangelical repentance, or the way by
which the penitent should come to God, in order
to be accepted. The state of my mind at that
time was this; I thought that if I sincerely repented
// File: 050.png
of my past sins, and did not commit sin for the
future, God would pardon my sins. I also promised
myself, that if I truly, and seriously, resolved
to serve God for the future period of my life,
God would on this account, give me strength to resist
every kind of temptation, and to overcome
every desire to sin. I promised myself, that, by
constant endeavours, and unremitting exertions, I
should overcome all obstacles, and finally merit
eternal life. I saw that God required of the penitent
sinner, future obedience: I was convinced that
this was just: I thought that God did not require
any thing but what he had given us power to perform,
if we were but willing to do so. I resolved
to be willing, and to try my strength to the utmost.
I thought that if I did meet with any thing that
was too hard for my present strength, God would
give me additional strength; but that the only way
to honour God was to use the power that he had already
given me. I thought it would be affronting
God to ask more, until I had first proved the insufficiency
of what I now possessed: and that it
would be insulting to divine goodness, to be seeking
that which was already bestowed upon me.
Under this frame of mind, I set about the performance
of religious duties. I prayed more frequently
and fervently; I read the Scriptures with greater
diligence and attention; I abstained from every
thing that was in my opinion sinful. But my past
sins were still painful to me, because I was not
yet assured that they were or should be pardoned.
I was, however, certain that if I continued to commit
sin, I should get no pardon, but if I forsook
// File: 051.png
sin, I might obtain pardon. The spirit of my
prayers was, entreating God to pardon my sins,
and promising to lead a holy life in future.
While in this state of mind, I went one evening
to the meeting-house, and as I was returning to
the barracks, pondering in my mind my guilt, as a
sinner, and the goodness and sparing mercy of
God, the powers of my mind having been buoyed
up by the fervour of the exhortations and prayers I
had heard, a sudden emotion started all at once
into my mind, that my sins were pardoned by God,
that God had promised pardon to such as me; and
that all that was required was, that I should believe
that God had pardoned my sins; that God
was faithful to his promise, and it would be to me,
even according to my faith. This emotion had a
powerful influence upon me. It gave peace to my
mind, for I took it to be one of those manifestations
of the Spirit, spoken of by those who preached,
exhorted, and prayed, at the meeting-house.
Under the impressions produced by it, I went on
very smoothly, abstaining from sins, to which I had
formerly been a slave. I now thought myself
happy, and promised to myself, that I would now
be able to live such a life, as should be pleasing to
God, and should procure and retain his favour.
But I must here add, that this impression that
my sins were actually pardoned, was not accompanied
with any increase of light to my understanding
of the way in which God forgives sin. I was as
blind to the nature of the great doctrines of the
justifying righteousness and atoning blood of Christ,
as I had been before. The views which at this
// File: 052.png
time I entertained of Christ's death, were, that he
had died to procure the pardon of such sins as
were committed by sinners, while in a state of ignorance
and impenitence. I believed that had
Christ not died, there would have been no pardon
for sin, but that his death had opened the door of
mercy to penitent sinners of all descriptions. I
thought all the design of God, was to bring men to
a sense of their moral duty, and to put them once
more in a fair way of discharging their moral obligations
to him, as their Creator and Preserver; and
that he had promised those who repented, his assistance
in all things that were difficult, and his
protection from outward danger; and that Christ's
death justified God, in granting pardon to penitent
sinners, on account of their penitence. I had some
faint recollection of what I had read in Boston's
Fourfold State, and the instructions I had received
in the Sabbath school, and from others, and could
discern that there was a difference between them
and the instructions I was now hearing, particularly
on the doctrine of election, and remaining
corruption in believers; but I had no fixed ideas
on these topics, only just as much as prevented me
from thinking that the Methodists were right, in
denying, that the doctrines of election, and of remaining
depravity in all believers, were taught in
the Bible. I thought they were, but they were
not any part of my own fixed belief. I read Wesley
on Christian perfection, and, although I did
not think he gave a sound view of some Scripture
texts, perfection was the thing I was striving
to obtain; a perfect obedience to the divine law
// File: 053.png
was what I had set out to accomplish; and the
following lines of one of Mr. Wesley's hymns,
were, for a time, very frequent in my mouth, and
repeated in secret prayer to God;
.pm verse-start
O grant that nothing in my heart
May dwell, but thy pure love alone;
.pm verse-end
and I resolved that my life should be one scene of
devotion and of gratitude to God. I continued to
go on pretty smoothly for about six weeks, and I
thought I had got the better of sinful inclinations;
but when I fancied I was strong, I soon had reason
to be convinced that I was weak, had I only been
willing to learn; for I again fell into some sins,
which I had flattered myself I should never more
be guilty of; and this broke my peace of mind, and
blasted all my hopes. I however found means to
heal the sore again, after having undergone considerable
pain of mind. I again set out by repenting,
and trusting in the mercy of God, and resolving
on future obedience; but my conduct was not
regular, and secret sins, which lay at times very
heavy upon my conscience, would overcome me,
although I strove against them with all my might.
I continued to attend the various meetings, public
and private, amongst the Methodists, while we
lay in Athlone. My attendance among them was
certainly of great benefit to me, in leading to a train
of experience, that materially contributed to make
me acquainted with the deep deceitfulness of my
own heart. I was indeed slow to learn; but what
took place with me at that time, afforded matter
for reflection afterwards. I think upon it still, and
// File: 054.png
see great reason for humility on account of my
blindness, in not seeing while I was there, that I
was without strength and without righteousness,
without Christ, and without hope, I can not tell
how far the gospel was set before me by the Methodists;
but I am pretty certain, from some expressions
that I have still a faint recollection of,
that Christ was set before me in a much clearer
light than I at that time apprehended him; I had,
all the time I was there, continued in a course of
sinning and repenting, making resolutions and
breaking them; and, although I suffered great pain
of conscience, I succeeded in quieting it by the
hope of better success the next time. When we
came to leave the place, I felt that I should not
have the same privilege, of the means of instruction
and social worship, at least for a while to come;
and this gave me less hope of myself, and filled
me with a greater degree of fear, that I should be
more liable to be overcome by temptation, when I
should not have the help of the means of grace.
I may here mention a simple incident that occurred
while I was in Athlone. One night I was placed
sentinel over a prisoner, in the room in which he
slept. He was asleep, and I did not disturb him;
a book lay near me; I took it up and passed the
two hours with it; it was a book of sermons on
Contentment, written by an old divine, (if I mistake
not, a Mr. Taylor of London,) but it matters
not who the author was. He handled it in a variety
of lights, and applied the principle of contentment
to the good works of Christians. I forgot
all that I read but the following expressions; he
// File: 055.png
said, that the genuine disciple of Christ was one,
who was willing to do every thing for the sake of
Christ, and, at the same time, was content to deny
all he had done for Christ's sake. The author
pursued his subject in a spiritual sense, and I was
taken with the book, although I did not understand
it. It was, however, written in such a strain of
piety, that I was struck with it; my memory kept
hold of the words, "do all for Christ, and deny all
for Christ;" and I would at times reflect upon them,
as strange and mysterious. I could never understand
them, but I could not help being struck with
them; and when the Lord opened my eyes several
years afterwards, I remembered I had read them,
and wondered how it was I did not understand
them sooner; but I was then carnal; and the things
of the Spirit were foolishness to me, for I had not
spiritual discernment.
We left Athlone, and marched to Cork, in June,
1799, to embark for England, and join the army
that was forming to invade Holland. After leaving
Athlone, I began to fall off in my attention to
serious things. I carried Gray's Sermons in my
knapsack, to oblige a comrade who was a Methodist,
but who had not room for it in his. I carried
it to the place of our embarkation, and returned it
to him, without having read any part of it. I had
read little or nothing of my Bible either, during the
march. I found out the Methodist meeting at
Cashil, where we stopt a day, and was at worship
twice or thrice.
We lay several weeks encamped at a place called
Monkton, near Cork, waiting for vessels to
// File: 056.png
carry us to England. I was twice or thrice at a
prayer meeting during that time; but although the
prospect of danger was increasing, I was increasingly
remiss in attending to religious duties; and
this was the case with the most part of those who
had been joined with the Methodists. There was
only one man in the regiment who was uniformly
steady and consistent in these things.
.fn #
They impressed into their service all the blacksmiths
they could find.
.fn-
.fn #
Reports varied as to the number landed: some reports
made them 15,000, others, as high as 30,000.
.fn-
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap3
CHAPTER III.
.sp 2
I continued in a very careless and listless state
of mind during the passage to England. We landed
at Dover, and marched to Barham downs,
where we were encamped. About ten thousand
troops were assembled at this place in a few days,
and Sir Ralph Abercrombie was appointed to command
them. Our regiment was put into a brigade
under the command of Sir John Moore. Lord
Huntly went upon the expedition as Colonel of the
regiment, for he was not yet a General upon the
English staff. We marched to Ramsgate, and
embarked on board of transports, on the 5th of
August, and sailed next day for Holland, under
convoy of a fleet of war ships, commanded by Admiral
Mitchell. A short time after we sailed, the
wind became contrary and stormy, and continued
so for about three weeks, which was an uncommon
circumstance at this season of the year; so
that, although the distance was short, the voyage
was tedious. This delay allowed time for reflection,
// File: 057.png
but I did not improve it, for whatever were
the passing thoughts of my mind, I was not seriously
impressed until a few days before we landed.
The wind becoming favourable and moderate, we
stood in for the coast of Holland, and anchored on
the evening of the 24th, near the entrance to the
Helder, and began to prepare to land. The Dutch
fleet, of eight sail of the line and three frigates, lay
in our sight in the outer road of the Helder; and
the fleet of Admiral Duncan, of about an equal
number, lay at anchor a few miles from them.
The fleet under Admiral Mitchell had an imposing
appearance; for it consisted of fifteen sail of the
line, and about fifty frigates, sloops of war, cutters,
and gun vessels, with about 130 transports. The
wind, however, became stormy again on the 25th,
and the fleet, under Admiral Mitchell, put to sea;
but it moderated during the night, and we returned
and anchored nearer the shore than before, on
the 26th, and prepared to land next morning. The
ships of war hoisted the English and Dutch flags
together, because the object of our intended invasion
was to expel the French and restore the former
government. The troops on board of the ships
nearest the shore (of which the ship I was in was
one) were ordered to land first. Our danger was
now more imminent than ever it had been before;
the probability of being suddenly called from time
to eternity, was more than ever apparent; and I
began again to pray and to meditate. We cooked
three days' provisions, to carry with us, and were
served out with ammunition on the evening previous
to our landing; we did not go to rest that
// File: 058.png
night, but kept on our accoutrements, to be ready
to go into the boats when a signal should be made.
Such a period is one of great agitation and anxiety.
The prospect of landing in the twilight of the
morning, on an enemy's coast, ignorant of the nature
and extent of the danger, where one can not
tell whether we may reach the shore, or be driven
back as soon as we land, or suddenly overpowered
before we can get assistance. These, and the
like, are serious considerations at a time like this.
During the night I was often praying in my mind
for mercy, that the Lord would spare me: and I
put on fresh resolutions, that if I was spared, I
would serve God with fidelity and diligence. All
my prayers were for the preservation of life: I
durst not resign myself to death, because I was
conscious I was not prepared for judgment. All
my hopes for eternity, were founded in reformation
of character, and that I had yet to begin; for
had I been cut off, at that time, I had no hope of
heaven.
The province of North Holland is a peninsula,
formed by the German ocean on the west, and the
Zuyder-sea on the east. The town of Helder
stands at the northern extremity, where the Zuyder-sea
communicates with the German ocean,
between the Helder point and the Texel island,
distant about six miles. The city of Amsterdam
stands on the south side of the Zuyder-sea, the
common passage to which is by the Helder. A
range of sand-hills runs along the coast of the German
ocean, close to the beach, and the country
between them and the Zuyder-sea is nearly a perfect
// File: 059.png
flat. Large dykes, or mounds of earth, run
along the shores of the Zuyder-sea to protect the
tide from overflowing the country, which is below
the level of high water. The sand-hills serve for
an embankment on the side of the German ocean.
The principal arsenal for equipping and repairing
the Dutch fleet is near the town of Helder, the
greater part of which rendezvouses there; but they
are built at Amsterdam and other places in the interior,
and floated down the Zuyder-sea, on account
of the shallowness of its water, and are fitted
out for sea at Helder.
We embarked in the boats early in the morning,
and collected at the stern of a gun vessel that
lay nearest the shore, where we waited until daylight
began to make the coast visible; I continued
at intervals offering up ejaculatory prayers to God,
for preservation and deliverance. As soon as the
coast was discernible, the gun vessel began to fire
her guns upon the shore, and the boats rowed off,
giving three loud cheers. The fire of the different
vessels of war that lay along the shore was dreadful:
but as the shot and shells were all thrown at
random, the enemy not being visible, it did little
damage; but it probably prevented the enemy from
appearing on the open beach, by which means we
got safely landed. The enemy's troops were posted
among the sand-hills at the different points opposite
to our extended anchorage, that were most
favourable for landing. These points were chiefly
at some distance to the right of the place we landed
at, where the beach, not being so favourable,
was not so strongly guarded. A part of his force
// File: 060.png
was also to our left, near the Fort at the entrance
to the Helder, where they had a camp. We
formed on the beach as we landed, and began to
advance into the sand-hills. Our regiment was
near the left of the line; there were only a few of
the enemy's picquets that appeared in our front,
who retired as we advanced: but the troops on the
right had not proceeded far before they fell in with
a division of the enemy, when a smart action began.
The enemy were quickly driven farther to
the right, but fresh columns soon arriving, the action
became increasingly warm, but our troops
continued to press upon the enemy, and took up a
position across the sand-hills, to cover the right of
the debarkation. Sir John Moore's brigade, in
which our regiment was, penetrated also across
them as soon as possible, and took up a position to
cover the left.
The sand-hills at this place are not of great
breadth; the road from Helder to the interior runs
along the interior side of them, the peninsula at
this place is narrow, and the ground between the
sand-hills and the Zuyder-sea is a flat, in many
parts swampy. As soon as the first party of our
regiment had reached the further side of the sand-hills,
they descried that part of the enemy's
force that had been posted on our left, passing
along the Helder road to join their forces that were
engaged with our right. They were composed of
horse artillery, cavalry, and infantry. As soon as
they observed our advance picquets, they left the
road, and made a circuit through the flat ground to
their left: and when they were out of the reach of
// File: 061.png
musketry they made a pause, and fired two field
pieces at us, which did us no hurt, and then passed
on and joined their own troops. The fire of
the ships of war that were anchored to the right
and left of the point of debarkation, prevented the
enemy from attempting to march along the beach
to disturb the landing. They also protected the
right flank of the troops that were engaged with the
enemy, but he attacked their front with his infantry,
and their left flank with his artillery; which
he kept upon the flat ground, on the inside of the
sand-hills, protected by his cavalry. Indeed infantry
were the only troops that were capable of
fighting among the sand-hills. Fresh columns
continuing to arrive during the course of the day,
to the support of the enemy, he maintained the
contest and renewed his efforts to dislodge our
troops, but as they also were reinforced by those
that continued to land, they repulsed all his attacks
and gained ground; but, as we had neither artillery
nor cavalry, we dared not to attack his that
were posted in the plain, nor was it expedient to
advance far until the army should all be landed.
The enemy continued his efforts from five o'clock
in the morning till four o'clock in the afternoon,
when the army was nearly all landed, and some
pieces of artillery were brought to bear upon the
enemy's cavalry and artillery. The troops then
charged his infantry, and drove them beyond
Challantes Ogg, a place where an inundation of
water from the Zuyder-sea contracts the peninsula
nearly to the breadth of the sand-hills. The enemy
then retreated into the interior, and left us in
// File: 062.png
possession of our position, which separated him
from the Helder. Another fleet of transports, with
five thousand additional troops from England, appeared
at sea in the afternoon, and anchored in
the evening. Our regiment was not engaged
through this day; but Sir John Moore's brigade
was destined to attack the batteries and town of
Helder next morning, if the enemy's garrison still
remained in them. The loss of the army during
this day's conflict was about a thousand men killed
and wounded. Our regiment lost sixteen men,
who were drowned in the act of landing, the boat
having struck on a bank at some distance from the
shore; the men got out of the boat, but got into
deep water before they reached the beach, and
the swell having increased at the time they were
landing, they, along with several seamen belonging
to the boat, were drowned. I knew most of
them; one of them was a particular acquaintance,
whose death made a strong impression on my
mind.
As soon as it was fully dark our brigade marched
away for the Helder. There is something impressive
in a march under the cloud of night, in a
strange land, where we can not tell the danger we
are in, and have to move forward in solemn
silence. It was ordered, that no man was to speak
above his breath during the march; and all orders
to halt, or move forward, were given the same
way. We had frequent stops, which made us,
who were not in the front, often wonder what was
the matter. Such a march is a service in which
the mind undergoes much harassing anxiety, and
// File: 063.png
the body much fatigue. Having come near to the
Helder, we halted, and lay under arms, in a state
of great anxiety, until daylight; several of their
ships of war were then seen at anchor near the
town, but they got quickly under weigh, and their
whole fleet anchored in the Zuyder-sea, about 12
miles from the Helder; which was the farthest
distance they could go to on account of the shallowness
of the water. After waiting some time
we obtained information that the enemy had evacuated
the various forts and batteries about the
place. We sent out small detachments, who found
that it was so, and we then entered the place, and
put guards in the different works. When I reflected
on the dangers we had escaped, I was filled
with wonder; but I soon forgot them all; and
during the few days that we lay in the town of
Helder, my conduct, in place of being better, was
worse than ordinary.
The transports, and a number of our frigates,
came into the Helder next day, and the artillery,
cavalry, and stores, were landed in the harbour.
The day following the ships of the line came in,
and admiral Mitchel went forward to the Dutch
fleet, with a squadron of nine sail of the line, and
five frigates. The Dutch fleet then surrendered
without firing a shot, and hoisted the orange flag.
Their crews were in a state of mutiny at the time,
partly out of disaffection to the new republican
government, but more particularly for want of pay.
When they were ordered to prepare for action
they refused to fight, and threw the balls and cartridges
into the sea. It would, indeed, have been
// File: 064.png
a useless waste of blood for them to have resisted,
for if the squadron that went to them had not
been sufficient to have reduced them, there were
more than enough of war ships, of all descriptions,
at hand to have completely overwhelmed them;
for after the batteries of the Helder were in our
possession, they had no way of saving their ships
to their country but by taking out their guns and
masts to lighten them, and towing them through
the shallow water to some of the ports in the interior,
out of our reach. And why they did not
do so is not easily accounted for. Besides this
fleet of eight sail of the line, three frigates, and a
sloop, there were two sail of the line, eleven
frigates and smaller vessels of war, and three East
India ships lying in the harbour, in various conditions.
A large quantity of ammunition and
stores, and a great number of cannon for the
equipment of ships, were found in the arsenal, exclusive
of the guns and mortars that were on the
batteries, many of which were brass.
The army lay among the sand-hills, where it
had fought on the day of landing, until the 1st
September, when the artillery and cavalry being
landed, it moved forward into the interior of the
country. Our regiment left the Helder, another
occupying it, and joined the army, which took up
a position in the afternoon, upon one of those huge
dykes that are in Holland, which extended from
the German Ocean, where we posted our right, to
the Zuyder-sea, where we posted our left, a distance
of about eight miles. We occupied it, at
all the parts that were passable, and threw up
// File: 065.png
works upon it, particularly at the extremities. It
formed a most excellent position of defence in
such a flat country, on account of its thickness
and height. The top of it was so broad that any
carriages had full liberty to pass, and was one of
the best roads in the country; and it was not
made in a straight line, but bent in curves, like
the bastions of a garrison line wall. A large ditch
runs the whole length in front of it, with large reservoirs
of water in the curves. The use of this
dyke was to prevent the rain that falls in the winter,
on the south side of it, from flooding the country
on the north side, where the level is lower.
The reservoirs in the curves of the dyke receive
the water, and there are sluices that are opened to
allow it to pass by degrees, under the dyke, into a
large canal, a little in the rear of it, from whence
it is let out into the sea, when the tide is low.
We had no tents, but were lodged in the farm
houses, which, in Holland, are large, and of a
peculiar construction, having the byre, stable, hayloft,
and barn, under one large oblong square roof,
made of thatch. A great number of these houses
were ranged at such regular distances, along the
banks of the canals, in the rear of the dyke, that
they formed convenient cantonments; and each
house contained from one to two hundred, who
slept in a loft among the hay, without any other
covering than their great coats and the hay. The
fields are all divided by broad and deep ditches, in
place of hedges, which are only to be seen upon
parts of the road sides, and round the orchards at
the farm houses and gentlemen's seats. All the
// File: 066.png
ditches have communications with the large canals
that communicate with the sea. A great number
of wind-mills are employed in forcing the water
up into the canals, which are above the level of
the ground in the winter time, and in forcing the
water into the ditches whose elevation is highest,
from whence it flows over locks into the lower
ditches in the summer season, so that the ditches
are always full. The apparatus of the wind-mills
is simple: a number of long broad paddles are
fixed in an axle, the lower ends of which dip into a
box of little more than their own breadth, into
which the water of the lower level flows, and the
rapidity with which the paddles are driven makes
them throw the water off their flat sides, to all the
height that is needed. The country being below
the level of the sea, there are no spring-wells of
fresh water in it. The rain that falls on the roofs
of their houses is conveyed into a cistern, built of
brick, sunk in the ground at the side of the door,
or under one of the corners of the house, and some
of them have an opening into the cistern both within
and on the outside of the house. The Dutch are
proverbial for their cleanliness and ingenious industry.
I admired, among other things, their way
of churning their butter. A large wheel, with a
broad rim, the spokes of which were fastened to
the one side of the rim, was fixed upon a nave in
the wall, at one of the corners of the house, with
the spokes next to the wall; small pieces of wood
were nailed across the inside of the rim; a belt
that was upon the rim turned a crank that was
above it; the churn stood on the floor under the
// File: 067.png
crank which lifted the churn staff up and down;
there was a close lid upon the churn, with a slit
in the centre, in which the churn staff moved, so
much of which was flat as allowed it to move in
the slit. The wheel was turned round by a dog,
who was put into the inside of the rim upon the
open side; he catched the small cross pieces of
wood, that were on the inside of the fore part of
the rim, at some height, with his feet, and the
weight of his body turned the wheel. The poor
dog was tied by a cord round his neck at such a
height, to an upright post at the side of the fore
part of the wheel, that if he did not work he would
be hanged. There were generally two dogs employed,
the one relieving the other.
The Dutchmen wear large small-clothes and
cocked hats; the women wear stays and hoops in
their petticoats, and low crowned broad brimmed
straw hats; but I did not see any that were gaudy,
or ragged, in any part of the country I was in.
On the 10th of September, 1799, the enemy,
having received accessions to their number, attacked
us in our position. It was known to them,
that we were shortly to receive large reinforcements;
and they determined to attack us before
these arrived. A strong party attacked the position
entrusted to our regiment, which was the first
time that we were in actual action with an enemy.
The dyke sheltered us from their shot; for when
they drew near, we stood on the top of it and fired
a volley or two, which drove them back, and then
we sheltered ourselves from the fire of their artillery
by sitting down on the near side of it. The
// File: 068.png
shot whistled over our heads, and fell, when its
strength was spent, on the ground in our rear.
The enemy was repulsed at all points with loss.
Our regiment's loss was small; one man killed,
and the captain of the grenadiers, and three men
wounded. General Moore was also slightly wounded.
When the main body of the enemy retreated,
a number of their riflemen remained behind them,
under the cover of a house that was near the dyke;
one of them came from under the cover, and ran
to join the main body; he was instantly fired at I
dare say by twenty; yet he got clear off, without
any appearance of being hurt. The risk that he
ran deterred the remainder from following him,
and they surrendered themselves prisoners of war,
in number about one hundred.
Shortly after the action of the 10th, a number
of troops arrived from England, along with the
Duke of York, who took the chief command of
the army. A large body of Russian troops also
joined us, which increased our number to about
thirty-five thousand. And on the 19th September
the whole moved forward to attack the enemy.
Sir Ralph Abercrombie, with about eight or ten
thousand men, of which our brigade was a part,
marched the preceding night past the right flank
of the enemy, and took the town of Hoorn by surprise.
We were now a good way in the rear of
the enemy's right, and it was intended that the
Duke of York, with the main body of the army,
should dislodge the enemy from his positions, and
that we should then attack them on their flank and
rear, and cut off their retreat.
// File: 069.png
The Duke was successful at the outset of the
action, but the Russians under his command falling
into disorder, the enemy rallied upon them,
repulsed them, and took a great number of them
prisoners, which compelled the Duke to retreat.
We heard the firing of the cannon while we lay
on our arms, waiting for orders to move, but, when
word was brought that the Duke of York had been
driven back, we retired the same way that we
came, and were not engaged in this action. We
began now to say that we were a lucky regiment;
various expressions were used by the soldiers,
when speaking of our good luck, (as it was called)
some of them very foolish, which I do not mention.
Some said, that there were too many old women
in Scotland, praying for their children and friends,
to allow us to be exposed to great danger. I began
to reflect seriously upon our past preservation, and
the bad improvement that we were making of it;
and the thought made me tremble: I thought, "It
may be, that God has been more favourable to us
than to others, on account of the prayers of godly
relatives at home; but his kindness has a claim
upon our gratitude, and if it does not produce gratitude
from us to him, he may be provoked to punish
us severely, and make his punishment in proportion
to his past kindness; and the longer that he
bears with us, the stroke may be the heavier when
it comes; and although we have as yet escaped
more than other regiments, in the next battle it
may be, that for hardening ourselves in sin, and
flattering ourselves with security, on account of
the prayers of godly relatives, we may suffer more
// File: 070.png
severely than any others:"--and my fears were
not groundless.
The sand-hills which run along the sea coast
from Helder, terminated a little in the rear of
Patten, where our right was posted, and commenced
again about three miles farther south, in
our front. An embankment of sand fills up this
breach, and prevents the sea from flowing over
the flat country. Tufts of strong straw are set in
the sand in regular rows, like plants in a garden,
the whole breadth and length of the embankment.
The tops of the tufts rise upwards of a foot above
the surface of the sand, and the sand that is washed
up by the tide or blown by the wind, lodges
about their roots, and as the tufts are regularly renewed,
they not only preserve this bank of light
sand from diminishing, but also increase its size
and solidity. The left of the enemy's army was
posted at the commencement of the sand-hills. It
was determined that Sir Ralph Abercrombie, with
a division of British troops, should attack the enemy
posted there, while the Duke of York, with
the other division of the army, should attack
their positions in the flat country. We left our
cantonments before one o'clock of the morning
of the 2d October, and assembled before day-break
on the beach in front of the enemy's
lines. At day-break we began to drive in their
outposts; and continued to advance along the sea-side,
while another part of the army advanced
along the inland side of the sand-hills, with a line
of communication across them. The breadth of
the beach along which we advanced was various:
// File: 071.png
(the attack had been several days delayed, on account
of stormy weather, which drove the sea so
far upon the beach, as to leave no passage betwixt
the sand-hills and the water:) it admitted sometimes
of two or three companies to march abreast,
and sometimes scarcely of one. We had four
pieces of cannon in front, which fired upon the
enemy, who retired along the beach as we advanced.
I passed close by a man who had been
struck with a cannon ball upon the knee joint; the
ball had carried away the joint, and left a ligament
of skin on each side of it, which held the
leg suspended to the thigh. A little farther, I
passed near a man who lay stretched upon his
back, dead;--his eyes and countenance had something
in them peculiarly dreadful; yet he appeared
to be only shot through the thigh with a musket
ball:--but it was the centre of it, and it had
proved instantly mortal. I was so struck with this
man's ghastly appearance, that I thought with myself,
"Were I a poet, I would choose, as my subject,
the horrors of war, that I might persuade
mankind not to engage in it."--As we continued
to advance, the sand-hills increased in breadth,
which required additional troops to fill up the line
of communication across them; we who remained
upon the beach, saw nothing that was doing in
the interior of the sand-hills; and as the firing
there was only musketry, the roar of the sea upon
the beach prevented us from hearing it, except
when it was close to us. We had frequent and
long pauses, waiting for the movement of others.
There was a great deal of bloodshed in the interior
of the sand-hills, by the continued skirmishing,
// File: 072.png
and detached attacks upon particular points.--These
sand-hills were admirably adapted for this
mode of warfare; the enemy would have been
much more easily driven out of trenches;--for the
sand-hills were the same as a succession of trenches,
so that when the enemy saw our troops advancing,
they continued to fire upon us until they
saw that we were just near enough to allow them
time safely to retire to the next range of hills. The
sand-hills are not much unlike snow blown into
wreaths, by a strong wind: they are various in
their heights and shapes; some being conical and
steep, and others running in winding ridges; and
the sand is so light, as to be carried about with the
wind. It is extremely difficult to walk amongst it,
being like dry snow, a little hard on the surface,
which when once broken, is almost impassable:
here and there, there are chasms, and hollow flats
of various extents among them.
Towards the afternoon we drew near a place
called Egmont, a small fishing town among the
sand-hills, near to where the battle of Camperdown
was fought. Here the enemy had drawn a
number of fishing sloops and schuyts upon the
beach, in two lines, leaving intervals between
them, for their troops to pass. These formed a
cover to their columns from our shot, and concealed
their cavalry from our view. During the action
they had received a reinforcement, which they
pushed along the sand-hills close to the beach.
The line across these, owing to their increased
breadth, now occupied all the regiments of our
division but ourselves. The enemy began to press
// File: 073.png
hard upon the troops that were near us, and so
posted themselves as to annoy us who were standing
upon the beach; we were a considerable time
exposed to this, and had a number both of officers
and men wounded, amongst which was Lord
Huntly, our Colonel, and a son of Sir Ralph
Abercrombie, who was at that time an ensign in
the regiment. A situation of this kind is the most
irksome for a soldier to be in; for when actively
engaged, the fury and bustle of action, to a considerable
degree, banishes the dread of danger from
the mind.
During the march along the beach, and the frequent
pauses we made, my mind had time for
serious reflection; I was alive to a sense of present
danger; and having no well grounded hope for
eternity should death be the issue, was led to pray
earnestly to God for mercy. While standing exposed
to the fire of the enemy, and the balls whistling
over us and amongst us, my former sins came
into my mind, with all my broken vows and resolutions;
my past ingratitude stared me in the face,
and made me tremble, but a sense of present danger
made me pray earnestly for mercy to pardon
my sins, and to preserve my life; I confessed that
I did not deserve what I sought, but I cast myself
on the mercy of God, and with increasing fortitude,
as I thought, resolved once more to forsake
every sin, and live only to him.--The enemy
having increased in numbers, the troops in the
sand-hills next to the beach began to give way.
Four companies detached from our regiment, with
Sir John Moore at their head, went to reinforce
// File: 074.png
them; but they were also soon overpowered; and
Sir John was wounded in three parts of the body,
and with difficulty escaped being taken prisoner;
the remaining six companies were then ordered to
form in three divisions, and march forward along
the beach, and then to wheel to our left, and
charge the enemy. I was in the front division.
We marched forward, and passed a number of the
enemy's troops, and came to a place where there
was a more than ordinary opening, and the sand
rose pretty high, in the form of a semicircle; into
this opening we wheeled, and were instantly exposed
to a fire upon both our flanks and front.
This staggered us, and we began to fire upon the
enemy, in place of pushing instantly forward to
that part of the height that was on our right,
driving the enemy from it, and taking up a position
there, from which we could have done them
more harm, and not have been so much exposed
ourselves. We continued to stand still and fire for
a few seconds, and then began to move forward,
firing as we advanced; the other two divisions had
wheeled into various openings in the sand-hills in
our rear, at the same time that we did. They
were strongly opposed by the enemy, who were
very superior in number; but hearing the firing of
our division in their rear, the enemy who opposed
them began to retreat into the interior of the sand-hills;
those who opposed us did the same, and we
continued to pursue them; but the action soon became
on both sides quite irregular; for the sand-hills
separated us into parties, so that the one party
frequently did not see what the other was doing,
// File: 075.png
and, in some instances, parties of our troops came
suddenly upon parties of the enemy. In one instance,
one of our parties having climbed to the top
of a sand ridge, found that a party of the enemy
was just beneath, and instantly rushed down the
ridge upon them; but the side of the ridge was so
steep and soft, that the effort to keep themselves
from falling prevented them from making regular
use of their arms. They were involuntarily precipitated
amongst the enemy, and the bottom of
the ridge was so narrow, and the footing on all
sides so soft, that neither party were able, for want
of room, to make use of the bayonet; but they
struck at each other with the butts of their firelocks,
and some individuals were fighting with
their fists.--For three quarters of an hour we
maintained a furious action, and drove the enemy
to a considerable distance; but so many had been
killed, and wounded, and scattered, that the officers
could no longer collect any great number into
one body. We then began to retreat: the enemy
turned upon us, and we lost a number of men by
their fire during the retreat. Our previous advance
had exhausted our bodily strength, and we
were much in want of water. I was very thirsty,
and began to grow very weak. In the course
of the retreat we came to a pretty steep rise of
sand. I felt myself unable to go over it in a straight
line, so had to make a circuit, to get over it where
it was lower; although it was almost a matter of
life and death with me, for a party of the enemy
was close behind us. As I was making this circuit,
a party, I think in number about six or seven,
// File: 076.png
fired at me all at once; (I was their only object;)
and I distinctly observed several balls strike the
sand ridge, both before and behind me, about
breast high. I really believe that had I been a
span-breadth farther forward or backwards from
the spot where I at the moment was, there would
have been several balls through my body. Before
any more fired at me, I got over the ridge, which
then secured me; and I joined the regiment, which
was near, and had taken up a position in the interior
of the sand-hills; and some fresh troops
arriving, the enemy was repulsed.
I no doubt had many hair-breadth escapes
during the action, of which I was insensible; but
the one I have mentioned, appeared to me as a
wonderful mercy of Providence, and I looked upon
it as laying me under an additional obligation to devote
my whole life to the service of God. If I was
bound to serve him, because he was my Creator,
I was now doubly bound to serve him, for my
wonderful preservation; and I thought that the ties
by which I was now bound, would undoubtedly
have this effect. I thought I should never indulge
in any thing that was sinful; but I was still blind
to my own weakness; I had thought the same
thing, and had promised accordingly, in prayer to
God, at the outset of the action; yet the action
was scarcely begun, before I joined my comrades
in furious, opprobrious, and profane language
against the enemy. Many sins were thus unobserved
by me, and did not affect my conscience at
the time.
During the time that we were engaged in the
// File: 077.png
interior of the sand-hills, the enemy, seeing no infantry
on the beach to protect our guns, sent out
his cavalry, from their covert at Egmont, to seize
them. Our cavalry had gone into the chasms of
the sand-hills, that were next the beach, a little in
the rear, to shelter themselves from the fire of the
enemy's cannon. They formed upon the beach,
and sprang forward to meet the enemy, who had,
by this time, reached the guns. They charged
the enemy briskly, and drove them back with considerable
loss, and pursued them close to Egmont.
But, what is something singular, the infantry parties
of French and British, that were on the sand-hills
next the beach, suspended, as it were by
mutual consent, their firing, to become spectators
of the cavalry, and did not commence again until
the contest of the cavalry was decided.
The firing ceased sometime before sunset; I was
much in want of water, and went along with
another to search for it. We found it at last, in
the hollow of the opening of the sand-hills, into
which we had wheeled when we left the beach
and engaged the enemy. There had been a good
deal of rain some days before: and the trampling
of our feet upon the surface of the sand had brought
water to it, which being observed by some who
came to the place afterwards, they dug a small
hole in the sand, and put into it the sides of an
empty broken ammunition box, which served for
cradling; and the hole was soon filled with good
water. A number more of such kind of wells were
presently made, and plenty of water got, which
supplied both horse and foot. We filled our canteens;
// File: 078.png
and then went to look among the dead and
wounded, for a comrade, of whom we could get
no certain account. The spectacle of the dead,
the dying, and the wounded, greatly affected me.
The dead were lying stiff on the ground, in various
postures; but death had so altered their countenances,
that of all that I saw, belonging to the
regiment, with many of whom I had been familiar,
I knew only two; and it was by peculiar marks,
such as death could not alter, that we distinguished
even them. The groaning of the wounded was
very afflicting; for they were mostly bad cases, all
that were able to walk or crawl having removed
farther to the rear; and all the assistance that
could be given to those who were unable to move,
was to carry them from the spot where they were
lying, to a place of greater shelter. This had been
in part already done, and the wounded were lying
in groupes, in the best sheltered hollows adjacent
to the beach. The universal cry of these poor men
was for water. I supplied them as far as I was
able, both enemies and friends, and amongst the
rest one of our own officers, who was most severely
wounded. I had to hold him up and put
the canteen to his mouth, for he was unable to
help himself; he died during the night. We did
not find the object of our search; but we got afterwards
certain account of his having been wounded,
and probable accounts of his death; and we never
heard more of him.
I returned to join the regiment, ruminating on
the affecting sight I had seen, and grieved for the
loss of comrades and acquaintances. When the
// File: 079.png
regiment was mustered in the evening, about one
half were amissing; but about thirty joined in a
day or two after, who had lost the regiment. We
were upwards of 600 strong; and our loss in killed,
wounded and prisoners (of whom there were
40), was 288. The company to which I belonged,
entered the field with 59 rank and file, and
three serjeants, out of which 5 were killed on the
field, and 24 were wounded, 5 of whom died in a
few days, and three shortly after. Of the rest,
few recovered, so as to be fit for service. The
regiment had suffered this severe loss in about three
quarters of an hour. There was a universal gloom
upon every countenance, when we looked to the
smallness of our number, when we were mustered;
and there was no one, but what had lost comrades
and associates, and some had lost relatives. After
it was dark, we planted our picquets, and the
remainder of us lay down among the sand. I reflected
upon my own escape--upon the great number
who had already been launched into eternity,
and others whom I had seen groaning under the
pain of wounds, which would soon prove mortal to
many of them. I thanked God for his kindness
to me, and promised to keep his commandments
in future.
We lay three days among the sand hills: the
weather was cold; the nights stormy and wet.--We
were waiting for the movements of the other
divisions of the army, in the interior of the country.
The day after the battle, we buried such of our
dead as were adjacent to us. One man belonging
to the company I was in, was found dead, without
// File: 080.png
any mark of violence on his body. He was lying
on the ascent of a sand-ridge, and had fallen on
the retreat. We conjectured, that fatigue and
want of water had occasioned his death. I was
informed of another singular case: A Frenchman
and a Highlander had charged upon each other;
the Frenchman had parried the thrust of the Highlander,
and run him through the body; the Highlander
had then let go his hold of the butt end of
his piece with his right hand, and seized, with a
death-grasp, the throat of the Frenchman; who,
to extricate himself, had also let go the hold which
he had of his firelock with his right hand, and
seized the wrist of the Highlander, to pull it away
from his throat; but he had been unable:--the
Frenchman had then staggered backwards, and
had fallen on his back; and the Highlander above
him, still retaining hold of his throat; and, in the
struggle that had then taken place, the head of the
Highlander had projected so far over the head of
the Frenchman, as to bring that part of the body
of the former in which the bayonet was, over the
mouth of the latter; and in this posture both had
expired. Those who saw it, said, the sight was
truly shocking. The Frenchman was fairly strangled;
his eyes were out of their sockets; his tongue
was greatly swelled, and thrust far out of his
mouth, into which the blood from the wound of
the Highlander was running. Each still held a
firm hold of his firelock with his left hand; and
when the Highlander was removed from the
Frenchman, and laid along-side of him, he still
kept such a firm grasp of his throat, that he raised
// File: 081.png
the body of the Frenchman from the ground, and
it was with difficulty it was extricated from the
hold.
The result of the battle of the 2d October compelled
the enemy to abandon his positions, and
evacuate the town of Alkmaar, which was his head
quarters, and fall back nearer to Amsterdam.--Alkmaar
was occupied by our troops on the 3d,
and as our brigade had been much reduced in number,
we were ordered to go there to form a part of
its intended garrison. The peninsula is here of
considerable breadth, and the country much superior
to that on the north side of the long dyke, but
it is still intersected with deep broad ditches and
canals, which greatly impede military operations.
The rain that had lately fallen had filled the canals
and ditches so full of water, that the edges
and lower parts of the roads were beginning to be
covered, as we passed from Egmont to Alkmaar;
and as the roads, for want of stone, were made of
earth, or a slight layer of sand upon earth or clay,
they were beginning to be deep. There are narrow
foot-paths laid with brick, between some of
the towns. Alkmaar is a town of considerable
size, surrounded with a high mound of earth and
a canal; all the entrances to it are over drawbridges
and through gates, the principal of which
have cannon mounted on them. The streets are
paved with whinstone in the centre, and on the
sides with brick or flags, and a number of large
canals run through the centre of the principal of
them.
We entered the town on the 5th, and next day,
// File: 082.png
which was Sunday, the garrison was taken to the
church, to attend divine service. The Dutch congregation
had been dismissed; but their minister,
and a number of others, remained, to be a witness
of our service. The church was large, and of
Gothic structure, and had the largest and most
highly ornamented organ I ever saw. The enemy
had received reinforcements the day before, and
he commenced an attack upon the positions of the
army, at the time we were in the church. The
prayers of the liturgy had been read, and the minister
had begun his sermon, when we began to
hear the noise of cannon at a distance; by the time
the sermon was ended, the firing of cannon had
approached nearer the town and was beginning to
be heavy, and the musketry was heard to mingle
in the roar; and the large organ played Malbrouk
as we left the church, to repair to our alarm posts.
The action continued to be warmly contested, until
after it was dark; but the enemy was repulsed,
and fell back to his position, and one hundred and
eighty-eight prisoners were taken, and brought
into Alkmaar on the morning of the 7th.
About two o'clock in the afternoon the prisoners
were assembled, and a captain and forty men, of
whom I was one, were appointed to escort them to
our former head-quarters, on the north side of the
long dyke. Only thirty of the prisoners were
French; the others were Dutchmen, and had put
up the orange cockade after they were made prisoners.
Numbers of them had money, with which
they procured gin before we left the town; and
they drank and sung songs (which we believed
// File: 083.png
were in praise of their former government), as we
went along the road. The Frenchmen, who were
enthusiastic republicans, scorned the Dutch for
putting up the orange cockade, and kept by themselves,
on the front of the party. We kept them
all in good humour, and until the fatigue of travelling
had exhausted our strength, the march of
the prisoners resembled more the merry air of a
wedding procession, than of that gloom which the
thought of their being under an escort of their enemies,
and on the way to a prison in a foreign land,
might naturally be expected to produce. It continued
to rain upon us the greater part of the way,
this, with the deepness of the roads and the length
of the journey, fatigued us exceedingly, and scattered
us into parties; yet, notwithstanding of this,
and although a great part of the journey was performed
after it was dark, and although the prisoners
were in their own country, none of them attempted
to escape. When we had delivered them
over to another guard, to watch them through the
night, we retired to rest in the expectation of returning
to Alkmaar next day, but we were surprised
to hear in the morning, that the army was
retreating; and in a few hours, the various divisions
arrived and resumed the positions they had
occupied previous to the battle of the 2d.
The reasons of this retrograde movement were
the badness of the roads from Helder to the interior.
The army received its bread from the fleet,
and all the ammunition and military stores; the
roads were becoming impassable, and the farther
we advanced, the difficulties of fetching our supplies
// File: 084.png
from the Helder were increasing. The
French armies in Switzerland, and on the Rhine,
had gained decisive victories, which enabled them
to detach large bodies of troops, which were on
their way, to reinforce their army in Holland,
which would then become so strong as to be able
to overpower us. It had, therefore, been determined
to retreat while the roads were passable,
lest our retreat might be cut off. The army retired
from all its positions early in the morning,
and the rear guard left Alkmaar early in the day.--The
enemy, after being repulsed on the 6th, was
apprehensive that we might attack him, and was
prepared, in that case, to retire to Haarlem; our
retreating was not expected by him, and it was
about 10 o'clock in the forenoon before his advanced
cavalry picquets discerned that Alkmaar
was evacuated, when they entered and found a
few drunken women and soldiers, whose intoxication
prevented them from knowing that the army
had retreated. In a few days after the retreat of
the army, an armistice was agreed upon, the conditions
of which were, that we should evacuate
Holland by the end of November, and release eight
thousand prisoners without exchange, as a boon
for our being allowed quietly to re-embark. This
agreement put an end to hostilities, and preparations
were made to send home the troops with all
possible expedition; but, before we left the country,
I caught the ague, and after we had arrived in England,
in the beginning of November, 1799, I was
put into the hospital in Chelmsford, twenty-six
miles from London. I was greatly reduced in
// File: 085.png
body before I recovered, which was not until the
beginning of the next year, 1800.--God's mercy
in granting me a recovery from the ague, impressed
my mind with the additional obligations I was now
laid under to serve him:--but, as formerly, my
resolutions of mind were soon broken; conscience
soon found matter of accusation against me; I was
at times careless and listless, and at other times
thoughtful and pensive. The barracks in which
we lay, were about a mile from the town of Chelmsford.
There was a tabernacle in the town, where
there was a sermon once a fortnight in the evening.
I went several times to it; and the sermons served
to awaken my religious impressions. One
evening, the preacher described a case of conscience;
which I thought not unlike my own; and
among other directions, he exhorted the person
who might be in such a case, to lay it before God
in prayer. After the service was over, I shunned
my companions; returned to the barracks alone,
and prayed to God for light and direction as I
went along the road; and I set about reforming my
conduct once more. But I soon fell through it,
and was thrown as far back as ever.--There were
no religious meetings in the regiment, from the
time we left Ireland until a good while after this.
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap4
CHAPTER IV.
.sp 2
We left Chelmsford on the 14th of April, and
marched to the Isle of Wight, where we lay until
// File: 086.png
the 27th May. I was once in the Methodist
meeting house while we lay in the town of Newport.
On the 27th May, 1800, we embarked on
board the Diadem, 64 guns, and the Inconstant
frigate, both armed en flute (i. e. partially armed),
and fitted for the reception of troops. We left all
our women and heavy baggage in the Isle of Wight;
and as we were not informed where we were going,
this circumstance led us to conjecture, that
we were destined for some desperate and secret
enterprise. We were joined by some more ships
with troops, and sailed down the English channel,
until we fell in with the Channel fleet, under the
command of Sir John Jarvis. Sir Edward Pellew,
(now Lord Exmouth,) was sent along with
us, with a squadron of eight ships of war. It was
a magnificent sight to see the Channel fleet in regular
order. They were in number forty-four ships
of the line, (a large proportion of them three-deckers)
and a number of frigates. We sailed
along the cost of France until we came to the bay
of Quiberon, where we came to an anchor on the
2d June, near a small island called Houet, lying
betwixt the isle of Belleisle and the main land,
about four or five miles from the latter, and six or
seven from Belleisle.
On the 4th, which was the anniversary of his
Majesty's birth, a singular occurrence took place.
A sloop of war, and a number of boats armed with
carronades, having detachments of troops in them,
were despatched in the morning, to attack a battery
situated on a projecting point of the main
land, where it approaches nearest to Belleisle, and
// File: 087.png
from which ships coming to our present anchorage,
were liable to be fired upon. It lay about eight
or ten miles from us: but as the wind was light,
the sloop of war and the boats did not get near the
battery, until it was past twelve o'clock. The
battery then opened a fire from two 24 pounders,
which played briskly upon them. The day was
fine and clear, which permitted us to see the smoke
of every gun that was fired, and where the shot
struck the water. We looked on with eager anxiety,
and observed all the movements of the sloop
of war and the boats. It was near one o'clock
before she was in a position to return the fire of
the battery, which she did briskly. The armed
boats then pulled towards the shore, under cover of
her fire. At one o'clock they were close to the
battery, and commenced a smart fire upon it from
their carronades, and the contest was at the hottest,
just at the instant that the ships we were in,
were firing the salute in honour of his Majesty's
birth day. The enemy precipitately retired from
the battery, and the troops and seamen landed, dismounted
the guns, broke the carriages, and did
what other damage they could, and then returned
to the fleet. We all remarked the singularity of
the circumstance, that while we were saluting with
blank shot, they were saluting with round, double
headed, and grape shot, in real earnest, by which
several lives were lost, and some were wounded,
besides other damages.
We landed on the island of Houet on the 6th June.
It was a small place, almost destitute of cultivation,
and only a little fishing village on it. Some
// File: 088.png
more ships arrived from England with troops, and
preparations were made for attacking Belleisle.
On the 15th June, we were embarked on board
the ships of the line, in order to go near the island,
and make our debarkation from them, under the
cover of their guns. Our regiment was wholly on
board of the Terrible, 74. We were five days in
this ship; and here there were a number of the
sailors, who were serious, and united together few
prayer and praise; some of them were known to
several of our men; the seamen were all very kind,
and uncommonly obliging to us; every thing was
orderly and quiet; religion appeared to have so far
prevailed in this ship, as to give a general tone to
the manners and conversation of the seamen; so
that they were not like the same kind of men that
we met with in other ships of war. Those men,
who were not religious, did not make a mock at
religion; and those who were serious, were in the
habit of having what might be called public prayers
between decks, at stated periods. This was intimated
through the ship, by two or more individuals
going round and informing the sailors that
there were to be prayers at such a gun, say, No. 9
or 10, on the starboard or larboard side. At
these public meetings, I understood, that one or
other of them addressed their fellow seamen.--In
these practices they appeared to be protected
by their officers; and they held a meeting
for prayer and praise, on the forecastle,
evening and morning: I had some conversation
with some of them who were natives of
// File: 089.png
Scotland; but I was never actually present at any
of the meetings. We were so crowded, that it
was with difficulty we could move from one part
of the ship to another; and we durst never be any
time absent from the place where our arms were,
lest we should lose them, and not find them readily,
as we were under orders to be ready at a moment's
notice to go into the boats. Our coming to this
ship, was one of the steps of divine Providence for
my good; for seeing and hearing something of religion
in it, awakened once more in my heart, a
concern for my soul; and, although it wore off, as
before, it was a means of preventing me from becoming
confirmed in a state of careless indifference.
On the 18th June, the Captain 74, while under
sail, happened to approach the shore, and went
within reach of shot. When she put about, to
stand out from the shore, she was fired upon from
several points nearly in the same instant, and received
some damage before she got out of reach.
The batteries which fired upon her were concealed
from view; and we were informed, that the
shore was defended by batteries, at all the points
where it was convenient to land. We were waiting
for the arrival of some more troops from England,
which were hourly expected, but did not
arrive.--On the 20th, the enterprise was given up.
It was said, that during the hazy weather, which
had prevented us from seeing to any distance, re-enforcements
had been sent into Belleisle. We
returned to the isle of Houet, and to our tents,
which had been left standing. Our number was
// File: 090.png
said to be about 5000. On the next day, orders
arrived for us to embark, which was done; and
we sailed on the day following under sealed orders,
and left the ships of war that belonged to the
Channel fleet.
We had a pleasant and quick passage to the
Straits of Gibraltar, where our Commodore informed
us, that we were destined for the island of Minorca,
to join an expedition that was forming under
Sir Ralph Abercrombie, to assist the Austrians in
Italy. We passed through the Straits, but did not
touch at Gibraltar. We arrived at Minorca on
the 21st July. We then learned, that Sir Ralph
Abercrombie had already been at Leghorn; but
that the Austrians having sustained a severe defeat
from the French, under Buonaparte, had made
an agreement, which did not allow of British
troops being landed, and that Sir Ralph had
brought back what troops he had to Minorca.
We landed for refreshment and exercise on the 7th
of August, and the whole regiment embarked
again, on the 30th, on board of the Stately, 64.
We sailed on the 31st for Gibraltar, where we
arrived on the 14th September. We were there
joined by another expedition, under the command
of Sir James Pulteney. They had sailed from
England in the beginning of July, and had made a
descent on the coast of Spain at Ferrol, but had
not effected any thing, except alarming the country.
There was now a large body of troops on
board this fleet; their number being about 25000.
There were in all, upwards of 100 sail of large
ships; two-thirds of which were war vessels of
// File: 091.png
one description or other. We were in want of
water, to get which, we went to Tetuan bay,
which is on the Barbary shore, to the south-east
of Gibraltar, belonging to Morocco. Here the
whole fleet completed their stores of provisions and
water. We set sail on the 27th, with an intention
to pass the straits of Gibraltar; but the wind
changed, and after beating about, we put back to
Tetuan on the 29th. On the 1st October, the
wind having become fair, we set sail, passed
through the Straits, and anchored next day near
to Cadiz in Spain. On the 3d of October we got
orders to be in readiness to land. A flag of truce
came from the shore to the Admiral on the 4th,
and returned back the same day. On the 6th, the
day being fine, we weighed anchor and stood across
the bay of Cadiz, with the intention of landing
near the town of St. Mary's. The dispositions
having been made for landing, the ships of war,
intended to cover the debarkation, were moving
towards the shore, and a cutter had gone so near
as to be fired upon. The first division of troops were
in the boats, and had rowed off for the shore: we
were all in readiness, and were receiving our ammunition;
I had just got mine in six parcels, of
ten cartridges each, when a flag of truce, which
we had seen coming from the harbour, reached
the Admiral's ship; and before I had got the half
of the cartridges into my pouch, a signal was made
by the Admiral, for the boats to return, and put
the troops on board their respective ships, the design
of landing being relinquished.--We were
struck with the suddenness of the change. The
// File: 092.png
flag of truce returned to the shore; and a report
was spread, that the place had been ransomed by
money; but whether there was any truth in this,
or whether any political concession had been
made, can not be known. There was one thing,
however, and possibly it might be the only thing
that prevented our landing; the plague was raging
in Cadiz at the time.
I have been somewhat minute in detailing this
circumstance; but it has always appeared to me,
a very striking occurrence in Providence; for, in
a very few minutes, the war vessels would have
opened their broadsides upon the troops and batteries
on shore; the troops in the boats would soon
have been under the enemy's fire, and probably
have effected a landing; and, if hostilities had
once commenced, it is difficult to tell, but the enterprise
might have been pushed, until Cadiz had
been taken, and their fleet of war-ships captured
or destroyed, unless the Spanish force had been too
strong for us.
This event once more awakened me, by a sense
of apparent danger. The prospect of having to
contend with what troops might be in the field,
and of having to attack fortified places, and the
likelihood, that desperate efforts would be made to
gain our purpose, before the Spaniards should have
time to collect a large force in the field, made me
apprehend that the undertaking was one of no ordinary
danger. My conduct on this occasion
was similar to what it had been on former occasions.
I prayed for mercy and preservation. I
still had no hope for eternity, but what was to
// File: 093.png
arise out of future reformation of character, a reformation
which was yet to begin. As formerly,
I now again resolved to set about it:--but we left
the bay of Cadiz on the 7th, and returned to Tetuan
bay on the 12th, and part of the fleet put into
Gibraltar: and the danger I had dreaded being thus
past, the resolution it had excited was soon departed
from.
But another danger of a different kind was at
hand. On the 15th, the north-east wind had risen
to a great height, so that our boats, which had
gone with empty casks to get water, were obliged
to return to the ship and leave their casks on shore;
and the storm kept increasing as the evening drew
on. At 8 o'clock at night the splice of our cable
slipped, and we began to drift. As we had only
one other anchor on board, which was not sufficient
to ride the storm with, we endeavoured to
put to sea. It was at a great risk that we effected
this. We were in the midst of a large fleet, and
were every moment in danger of running foul of
one or other of the ships. With difficulty we
got the fore-sail, and some of the stay-sails set, and,
although the night was very dark, by the goodness
of God, we got clear out from the fleet, and steered
for Gibraltar. When we came there, as we
passed by the stern of the Admiral's ship, we
were ordered to pass through the Straits, and anchor
on the west side of Barbary. We accordingly
put about, and passed through the Straits
before the wind, going at the rate of seven miles
an hour, under our bare poles. We had a large
flat bottomed boat at our stern, which the stormy
// File: 094.png
weather did not permit us to hoist on board; and
by day-light in the morning, there was nothing of
it remaining but the keel with the ring-bolt, by
which it was towed. Before day-break we had
cleared the Straits of Gibraltar. We then set
some sail, and stood off and on the Barbary coast,
until the 17th, when, the weather moderating, we
cast anchor. On the 18th, the weather cleared
up, and we perceived a number of the fleet at anchor
to windward of us, nearer the shore, at about
20 miles distance. We weighed anchor and beat
to windward to join them; but the weather again
got squally, and about one o'clock a squall overtook
us, which carried away our main-top, and
top gallant, and mizen top-gallant masts. We
shortly after came to anchor near the fleet, and
the weather becoming moderate, in the course of
next day, we got our damages pretty well repaired,
and received an additional anchor from the Ajax
man of war. On the 23d we set sail; passed once
more through the Straits of Gibraltar; anchored
in Tetuan bay for the third time on the 26th; and
after having completed our water, and received
some more provisions, we sailed on the 8th Nov.
for Minorca, to get our provisions and other ship
stores completed.
We now began to hear that we were bound for
Egypt. At this we were all very sorry, not knowing
when we might return, or who might have the
happiness of seeing their native country again. I
had often read and heard of the dangerous nature of
the climate of Egypt and of the disasters of the
French army there by the plague. The prospect
// File: 095.png
now before us made a strong impression on my
mind. I became more serious; religion began to be
more attended to by several, and a party for prayer
and conversation was formed; but I was not one of
the number, being too proud to associate with them.
We made the island of Minorca on the 16th;
but the wind being strong and contrary, we did
not get into the harbour until the 21st; and having
obtained what we wanted, we set sail again on
the 27th for Malta, where we arrived on the 6th
December. The day we made the island was
very fine, and as Malta was a place of note on
various accounts, and amongst others, as being the
place where the apostle Paul suffered shipwreck,
I staid upon deck from the time we came in sight
of it, which was in the morning, until we were
anchored in the harbour. As we sailed along the
island, I anxiously looked for the "place where
two seas met." As we passed by the small island
of Comena, the creek where the apostle says they
thrust in the ship, was easily discerned. It bears
now the name of St. Paul's bay, and the channels
between Comena, Goza, and Malta, meet at it,
which marks it as the place which Paul describes.
We left Malta on the 21st, and sailed for Marmorice
bay in Asia. In our voyage, we coasted
along the whole length of the south side of the
island of Candia, which is ancient Crete, after
which we came to the isle of Rhodes, which is
only about 20 miles distant from the coast of Asia.
I felt a more than usual interest in looking at
those places, from what I had read of them in
history, particularly from what is said of them in the
// File: 096.png
Scriptures. Little did I think, in reading of them
when a boy, that I should one day see them, or
that I should do the duty of a soldier in the land
of Egypt.
From Rhodes we steered direct for the opposite
coast of Asia, and, entering into a passage of some
length, between two high hills, we wondered
where we were going, for we did not see any
place in this opening fit for ships to lie in, and the
land on both sides was rocky hills, covered with
wood, (except where the rocks were completely
bare of soil,) and appeared to be the habitations of
wild beasts. When we arrived very near the head
of the inlet, we were surprised to see a ship that
was a little ahead of us, get out of our sight almost
in an instant; but when we had got a little farther,
we found a passage which turned to the right,
round a very perpendicular hill, as suddenly as if
it had been the corner of a street. Into this passage
we sailed. It was but short, and in a few
minutes we entered into one of the largest and
finest bays, it is said, in the world. Here we cast
anchor on the 29th December, 1800, and lay until
the 23d February, 1801, making arrangements
for our attacking the French in Egypt; procuring
horses for the use of the artillery and cavalry: and
cutting wood for fuel, and for making fascines and
pallisades in case they should be needed after we
landed. The bay is nearly surrounded with high
hills, which, except in and about the small town of
Marmorice, are covered with wood, in general
very thick. There are great numbers of wild
beasts in the woods, which make so much noise
// File: 097.png
in the night time as to be heard over the whole
bay. There was a small plain on one side of the
bay, where we pitched tents for those that were
sick; but there was a necessity to have a guard,
to keep on fires in the rear of the tents, during the
night; and some nights the noise of the wild beasts
indicated their being so near the tents, that the
sentinels fired to keep them at a distance. Some
seamen belonging to one of the war ships, who
were cutting wood at one place, ventured to stay
all night on the shore; they were killed by the
wild beasts before morning.
We were not long in this place until a market
was erected on shore, and vessels from the adjacent
coast soon found their way to it, with all
kinds of fruit, and sheep and goats, and other useful
articles; so that that part of the shore assumed
the appearance of one of our country fairs. The
soil around the bay is to all appearance fertile;
but cultivation has been on the decline for a long
time past, which has allowed the wood to extend,
in several places, to the very shores. At some
distant period the shores seem to have been better
peopled, and the wood to have been farther back.
I found the ruins of a house upon the top of a
small eminence, pretty far back in the woods.
The walls were partly standing; trees were growing
out of the floor; a plot of ground, which had
been levelled for a garden, still retained its shape,
and had a fine spring of water running through it.
Land turtle is in plenty in the woods.
I shall now return, to state what were the exercises
of my mind during the passage up the Mediterranean,
// File: 098.png
and while we lay in this bay.--A book
upon the first principles of astronomy fell in my
way. This gave me a new view of creation: and
at the same time a treatise on Philology came into
my hands, in which was a descant on the glory of
God in the works of nature. I had undergone
some very sharp convictions of sin, my mind had
been strongly impressed with eternal things, and
I had persuaded two of my comrades to join with
me in prayer; which we did on several occasions,
but fell off from it. After reading the above-mentioned
books, and several volumes of the
Spectator, my mind fell into a strange speculative
frame, on the duty of the creature to glorify its
Creator, let the Creator do what he will to the
creature. I reasoned thus with myself:--That
every thing that God did was wise and just, therefore
it was our duty to glorify God for all that he
did to us, whether it was in judgment or in mercy:
did he deal with us in mercy--gratitude ought to
lead us to glorify him: did he deal with us in judgment--it
was our own sins that provoked him to
do it: he did no more than what was just; and we
were as really bound to glorify him for his justice,
as for his mercy; and if we did not do so, we augmented
our guilt. By reasoning in this way, I
came at last to a fallacious and very dangerous
conclusion, under the guise of wisdom. I concluded,
that if I could not lessen what guilt was
already contracted, neither altogether avoid contracting
more, it would be wise to contract as
little additional guilt as possible; and that, should
God deal with me in justice, I must not complain
// File: 099.png
and murmur; he is holy, just, and wise; he will
not punish me above what I deserve; whatever he
does with me, his creature, it becomes me to glorify
his name, by a cheerful acquiescence in his
divine procedure; yea, to glorify Him, should I be
for ever damned. By doing this, I may possibly
make hell more tolerable than otherwise it would
be: if I can not escape his justice, by his not granting
me mercy, let me behave in such a manner as
may make the consequences of his wrath sit the
lighter upon me.--I shudder to think on this part
of my experience at this day; on the pain of mind
with which it was accompanied, and the fallacious
and dangerous opiate which the conclusion contained
to lull my conscience asleep; for I did in
consequence fall into a careless and listless state
of mind. But, by the goodness of God, I was not
allowed to remain long under it. It happened one
day shortly after, that, from eating salt provisions,
and from the extreme scantiness of water, I became
exceedingly thirsty, and with great difficulty procured
a little to drink. A thought then shot across
my mind:--if I am so impatient under a temporary
thirst, and so eager to procure relief, how
shall I preserve my patience in hell?--if I am so
unhappy under the pressure of so trivial a circumstance,
how much more unhappy shall I be, if I
be cast into everlasting burnings, where I shall
not have one drop of water to cool my tongue!
This broke the delusion, but it did not eradicate it.
An infectious fever broke out among us. It was
at first slow in its progress, but after a short time
it began to infect numbers. Our condition on
// File: 100.png
board the Stately contributed towards it; for we
had no hammocks, nor beds, but only our camp
blankets to sleep in; we lay upon the under deck,
and, when the weather was stormy, so much water
leaked in by the edges of the ports, as made
the lee side of the ship very wet. When she
tacked, the water that was lying in the lee side
would then run across the whole deck; and although
we dried it the best way we could, yet we
were so crowded that we were often under the
necessity of lying down upon the damp deck.
This was hurtful to us, causing us to feel stiff, and
our bones sore; and although it did not produce
the fever, (for it was introduced by some recruits
who came on board at Malta,) it was, in my
opinion, one cause of its spreading so rapidly at
last.
I caught this fever at the time it began to
spread, and it was pretty severe upon me. I got
better, and relapsed, and the second turn of it was
worse than the first.[#] While under it I had time
to consider myself more fully. My present condition
was so painful, that I would have done all
in my power, and given all I could possess, to be
free from it; and yet with my most sanguine
hopes, I could not expect hell to be one half so
tolerable. What, thought I, is the glory of God
to me as a creature? If that same glory only
renders me miserable, will the misery of my condition
if I am sent to hell, be in any measure
// File: 101.png
alleviated, by the consideration, that the justice of
God is glorified by my condemnation? It is true,
I shall not cease to exist; but what pleasure can I
have in my existence, unless I reap some benefit
by it, by having some portion of happiness in it?
If I am made completely miserable, and have no
prospect of any portion of happiness for the future,
my existence must prove my greatest misery. He
who knows all things has said, "Good were it for
that man, if he had never been born." If the
justice of God dooms me to suffer for my sins,
woe is me! I now exist, and I can not annihilate
myself; nor can I fly from God's justice. I am a
sinner, and if I receive not mercy, I must be for
ever miserable! How awful is his justice! How
great is his power! How daring and delusive the
thought of hoping to find any portion of happiness
in that place, where he has declared all is perfect
misery; where nothing dwells but the terrors of
the Almighty; where the subjects of his justice are
a terror to themselves, and to each other; where
there is nothing but weeping, and wailing, and
gnashing of teeth!
As I began to recover, I turned my thoughts
more closely than before, to those places of Scripture
which describe hell, the place of torment. I
examined what the Scripture has said of its awful
nature; that it is "a fearful thing to fall into the
hands of the living God;"--for "who knoweth
the power of his anger?" and "our God is a consuming
fire." I found, also, that the Scripture
evidence of its being endless in its duration, was
as conclusive as that of the endless duration of the
// File: 102.png
happiness of heaven. He who said that the one
was eternal, said the same of the other. But, when
contemplating this awful subject, I was at times
tempted to think, "It may be, that although God
has said so, he may not intend to execute his
dreadful threatening to the full extent: there may
be a future period, in which he will extend mercy to
his creatures, but which he has kept hid from them,
for wise purposes, that they might not presume
on his mercy, and spend their present lives in sin,
and not repent in this world, because there would
be an opportunity to repent in the next."--But this
reasoning did not long deceive me; for I continued
to ponder the subject, and I saw that such a notion
did not consist with the veracity of God. He could
not say one thing, while he intended another; if I
admitted that he said one thing and intended
another, with respect to the duration of punishment
in hell, it would, with equal consistency,
apply to what he said of the endless happiness of
heaven, and so render uncertain any hope that
might be built upon the promise of it; and if the
principle were in one case admitted, it would
throw loose all his promises and threatenings, respecting
both this world and the next; for we should
still have room to think, God has said so, but he does
not mean so.--I also reflected, if God has said,
that the punishment of hell shall be eternal, and
has a secret purpose of mercy at some distant
period, if this is a secret of his own, how can any
one know it? If he has not told it, how is it possible
for any one to find out that which God intends
should be secret? Reflection upon this idea, put
// File: 103.png
an end to the speculation, as being a gross absurdity.
I also reflected on the nature of sin;--I
said to myself, "Supposing I were cast into hell
for the sins of my present life, would I cease to
commit sin when there? and if I did what was in
itself sinful in hell, would the torments of the
place excuse it? would the justice of God take no
cognisance of what I did there?" This was a
piercing exercise to my mind: but it was salutary;
and I believe I was indebted to what I had read
in Boston's Fourfold State for it, although I was
not aware of it at the time. I answered the above
queries in this way: If, when I am in a state of
partial sufferings here, I am not able to suffer without
being at least impatient and fretful, if I do not
actually complain and murmur--how can I expect
to behave any better in hell? My present sufferings
do not excuse the sins I commit under them;
I shall then, as well as now, be a subject of the
justice of God; and when I shall be suffering for
past sins, that will be no excuse for the commission
of new ones; if I am to make the debt of sin
less by suffering for it, I must not contract more
debt at the time I am paying the old; for if I do, I
shall continue to be a debtor; and as long as I
continue to commit sin, I must continue to suffer
for it, for the claims of Divine justice are indispensable.
Following out these reflections put a
complete end to all speculation, of the probability,
or possibility, of ever finding any portion of happiness,
if I did not obtain the pardon of my sins,
and deliverance from sin itself, before I left this
world, and appeared in the presence of God.--These
// File: 104.png
speculations show that my mind was ready
to catch at any thing, that appeared to furnish the
least hope, however delusive it might be; for when
I looked forward to eternity, not having the confidence
that arises from faith in the Lord Jesus, as
an all-sufficient Saviour, and not discerning the
doctrine of his complete atonement and justifying
righteousness, I was glad to lay hold of any thing
that appeared to afford the smallest glimpse of
hope, rather than be without hope altogether.
Having, by the goodness of God, recovered from
the fever, the effect of it was to make me resolve
once more to devote myself to his service. Gratitude
for his mercy in my recovery induced me to
do this; and I hoped for better success in my endeavours
than heretofore: but alas! it was not long
before my conscience found matter of accusation
against me; and this threw me as far back as ever.
I searched for a reason why I failed in my attempts
to serve God; but I did not find the true one. I
began to lay the blame on the example and conversation
of my comrades; and would fain have
palliated the evil of my conduct on this ground,
and flattered myself that God would therefore be
the less strict with me. But then I reflected, that
it would be a pernicious and fatal delusion for me,
to flatter myself with any thing that would not
stand the test of his judgment seat. I found no
toleration for sin, in any situation, in the word of
God; and my conscience charged me, not only with
wilful sins, for which I could devise no excuse,
but also with loving sin itself, which God hateth.
Yet, as experience had taught me that one thing
// File: 105.png
led to another, I determined to keep myself as
much as possible out of the company of the profligate,
and profane, and loose talkers, and to keep
my mind as constantly fixed as possible on serious
subjects. I set heaven with all its charms before
my mind, as the object to be gained, and hell with
all its terrors, as the object to be escaped. I contrasted
time with eternity, and said to myself,
Surely eternity is of such vast importance, as to
be worth all the sufferings that can be endured,
and all the exertions that can be made, in the narrow
bounds of human life. I again set out in a
new course of obedience, resolved to watch all the
avenues to temptation; and, under the influence of
this resolution, I avoided, as much as I could, in
my present situation, those whose conversation I
wished to shun; but it was impossible to be always
out of the hearing of it;--all I could do, was not
to mingle in converse with them; and I have frequently
stopped my ears with my fingers, that I
might not hear licentious and profane talk, when
I knew it was going on: but I could not do this
on every occasion, and when I did get it done, it
gave me a proof of the deceitfulness of my own
heart; for evil thoughts and sinful desires would
spring up in it even at the time when I was stopping
my ears, that I might not hear the wicked
conversation of others. To this, however, I was
not sufficiently attentive, but laid the blame, in
some shape or other, on the temptations with which
I was surrounded, as being, either directly or indirectly,
the cause why I was not able to keep my
own heart. This led me to despair of my ever
// File: 106.png
being able to serve God aright, and obtain his
favour by keeping his commandments while I remained
in the army. I therefore began to wish I
were free of it, and placed in a situation where
I should have it in my power to enjoy solitude,
and keep out of the way of temptation. I thought
that of a hermit a very favourable one; not that I
wished to be a hermit altogether, but I fancied if
I were only in a situation in which I could keep
myself, in a great measure, secluded from the
world, and give myself to reading, meditation, and
devotion, I should then serve God in a perfect
manner. Here again I began to reflect--What if
God cuts me off for my sins while I am in the
army? What shall become of me? Have I any
hope if I should die, or be slain, while in the
army? To this perplexing question I could give
no answer; all I could do, was to pray to God to
spare my life, to deliver me from the army, and to
bring me into a situation in which I should have
it in my power to serve him. But my mind soon
misgave me, and led me to suspect that this was
not right; and on examining it, I became convinced
that I was equally bound to serve God in
my present situation as in any other. Our Lord's
answer to Paul's prayer, "My grace is sufficient
for thee," and many other promises of God to his
people came into my mind; and, although I did not
understand them aright, yet they convinced me
that my situation would not be an excuse for my
sins; they convinced me, that if I was one of
God's children, his grace would be sufficient to
enable me to serve him acceptably, whatever situation
// File: 107.png
his providence might allot me. But knowing,
at the same time, that bad company had a great
effect in confirming evil habits, I still thought, that
were I but free of the army, I should have a great
deal less to struggle with. Before I was free of the
army, however, experience convinced me that
solitude was no antidote to a deceitful heart; for
in the solitary hours of night, while watching and
on guard, and during the sleepless nights passed in
the hospital, I found abundance of sinful thoughts
and desires arise in my heart.
I next went to the opposite extreme, and imagined
a state of unremitting activity was the best.
I thought that were I discharged and at home, I
should then enjoy the means of grace on the Sabbath;
that my work would occupy my mind the
greater part of my time through the week; and
that I should then have it in my power so to regulate
my conduct, as to take up my whole attention
between lawful and serious things, and thus leave
no vacant room in my mind for evil thoughts, or
what might lead me to the commission of sin.
Under these exercises of mind I continued until
the time when we left Marmorice Bay, which was
on the 23d February, 1801, when the fleet weighed
anchor, and were all safely collected upon the
coast, outside of the bay, before sun-set, and then
steered their course for Egypt. A Turkish Admiral,
with two or three frigates, had joined the
fleet. A number of Greek vessels also were with
us, which had been hired to transport the horses
that had been procured at Marmorice, for the use
of the artillery, cavalry, and field officers. The
// File: 108.png
wind was brisk, but the evening was fine, and as
our fleet consisted of near two hundred sail, many
of which were large and elegant ships, it had a
grand and interesting appearance. This interest
was heightened by the consideration of the sea,
and the coast, that we were sailing on, for the
celebrated island of Rhodes was on our right, and
the coast of Asia Minor on our left. The various
nations on board of this fleet, as seamen and soldiers,
was novel and striking, for there were
Turks, Greeks, and English, with Corsicans, and
a brigade of soldiers in our service, composed of
men from various parts of Germany, but the part
that the soldier was destined to act in the enterprise
before us, was to him the most interesting
contemplation, for his personal safety was the most
deeply involved in the undertaking. The wind
continued to freshen, and "the fleet had not stood
long on its course before one of the Greek vessels,
laden with mules, foundered, and one man alone
was saved." The Turkish frigates and Greek
vessels left us, and took shelter in the nearest ports.
The weather was not what we considered bad,
but they were not good navigators: their departure,
however, was a serious loss to the army, for
the want of the horses on board of them. The
weather became moderate, and on the 28th we
fell in with our squadron that was blockading
Alexandria, and on the 1st March discovered land
somewhat to the westward of that place. The
wind had been light through the day, but freshened
during the night, and there were heavy
showers of rain. This made the soldiers remark,
// File: 109.png
that if there was no rain in Egypt, there was rain
very near it; some who were of a deistical turn
began to insinuate that the Bible had not given a
correct account of Egypt; and the apparent contradiction
made some of us rather at a loss to reconcile
it. During the course of conversation on
this subject, I heard one observe, that the Bible
did not say directly that there never was any rain
in Egypt, but that when it spoke of there being no
rain there, it referred to the agriculture of Egypt,
not depending, like that of other countries, upon
rain, but upon the annual inundations of the Nile.[#]
This is the fact; but it is also true, that although
during the winter season there are thunder storms
and rain on the sea-coast, yet these seldom go far
into the country, and at Grand Cairo rain is a
great rarity. After the regiment had been at that
city and returned, and after we left Egypt, having
staid in it six months, I never heard any one urge
the objection any more. All agreed that the
scripture account of Egypt was as true as general
expressions could describe it; so that this, like
many other infidel objections, was founded on an
apparent, not a real contradiction. The universal
remark upon the country was, that they believed
a remnant of the plagues of Moses still existed
in it.
.fn #
There were few of the regiment that escaped it; all
relapsed after the first recovery, and those who were
longest of catching the infection were worst.
.fn-
.fn #
Zech. xiv. 18. Deut. xi. 10, and connexion.
.fn-
// File: 110.png
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap5
CHAPTER V.
.sp 2
On the forenoon of the 2d March, we cast anchor
in Aboukir Bay, the place where the battle
of the Nile was fought. Here we lay until the
8th, before the weather would permit us to land;
a period of great anxiety, for every hour was giving
the enemy time to collect his forces, and prepare
the means of defence. This made the prospect
increasingly awful. Our regiment was intended
to have been one of those which should land first;
but the fever having increased so much, that about
one half of our number were at this time sick, we
were unfit to perform a regiment's part, and
another of equal strength was put in our place.
The bay was shallow, and the ships which contained
the troops being in general of a large size,
had to anchor at a considerable distance from the
shore. On the 7th, a number of smaller vessels
which had been loaded with provisions, but whose
cargoes were now nearly expended, were moved
to about three miles from the shore; and several
regiments were put on board of them, that support
might be quickly given to those who landed first.
All of our regiment fit for duty were ordered into
one of these vessels in the evening. The weather
was now favourable, and every thing indicated
that the landing would be attempted next morning.
I slept little or none during the night; but frequently
employed myself in short prayers to God
to be merciful to me, and to spare me and protect
me from danger.--I was surprised this night
// File: 111.png
with a want of my ordinary sight, and heard numbers
of my comrades say that they did not see so
well as usual, and yet they had no pain in their
eyes.
About two o'clock in the morning the signal
was made for the first division of the troops to get
into the boats, and at three o'clock they were
ordered to row for their rendezvous in the rear of
one of the light war-vessels that was anchored
about a gun-shot from the shore. This was a
very fatiguing service to the seamen; because the
fleet was so widely anchored, and many of the
large ships so far from the shore, that it was nine
o'clock before they were all collected and arranged.
The enemy could see all our movements; and
the unavoidable delays that took place, gave them
a fair opportunity to provide for their defence, for
they now knew the only point at which we could
land. I contemplated the scene with an anxious
aching heart. The number of troops in the boats
was about 5500, and the whole army about 15,000,
of which there were about 1000 sick at the time
of landing, and of these about 400 belonged to our
own regiment.--There were two bomb ketches
and three sloops of war, anchored with their
broadsides to the shore; on the right flank of the
boats there were a cutter, two Turkish gun-boats,
and two armed launches; and on the left flank, a
cutter, a schooner, one gun-boat, and two launches.
These light vessels were to go as near the shore as
the water would admit, to annoy the enemy and
protect the boats.
At nine o'clock the signal was made for the
// File: 112.png
boats to advance; and the whole line advanced at
the same instant, giving three loud cheers. "The
French, to the number of two thousand, were
posted on the top of sand-hills, forming the concave
arc of a circle on the front of about a mile,
in the centre of which elevated itself, a nearly
perpendicular height of sixty yards, apparently inaccessible."[#]
The left of this rising ground was
a continuation of sand-hills close to the shore,
gradually diminishing in their height until they
ended in a long flat tongue forming the entrance
of Lake Maadie. The ground to the right of the
centre height on the shore was flat, but there were
clusters of thick bushes, (such as form the date or
palm tree), which were favourable for concealing
the enemy; and on the extremity of the right stood
the castle of Aboukir, in which were several 10
inch mortars, and a large Martello tower, having
two brass 32 pounders on its top, and which, from
its position and height, commanded nearly the
whole shore. As soon as the boats set off for the
beach, the two bomb ketches, and the three sloops
of war, began to throw their shot and shells upon the
// File: 113.png
shore; and the light vessels, stationed to protect
the flanks of the boats, moved along with them
and began to fire. The bulk of the enemy's field
artillery was in the flat ground, to the right of the
height before mentioned, the rest was among the
smaller sand-hills on the left of it. As soon as the
boats were within the reach of their shot, they
opened their fire on them; and it appeared to be
their design, to make their shot cross the boats in
the centre. The heavy guns on the top of the
tower in Aboukir castle, and the mortars, commenced,
at the same time, their fire on the right
flank of the boats. The scene now became dreadful;
the war vessels pouring whole broadsides;
the bomb ketches throwing shells, which, exploding
in the air, formed numerous little clouds;
and the gun-boats and cutters on the flanks of the
boats, exerting themselves to the utmost. As none
of these, however, could approach the shore, so
near as to be within the reach of grape-shot, or
even to have a certain aim, their exertions were of
little benefit to the boats; which pursued their progress
towards the shore, whilst the enemy's artillery,
(12 pieces, exclusive of the large guns in
Aboukir castle), continued to play upon them with
unremitting activity. All eyes were directed towards
the boats; every flash of the enemy's artillery
was noticed; and every eye on the stretch, to
discern where the shot might strike the water, to
observe if it lighted among the boats, and if any
of them were damaged or sunk; and we too often
had occasion to picture to our minds, when we
saw the shot strike in the middle of them, and
// File: 114.png
produce disorder, how many it might have killed,
or wounded, or drowned; for my own part, although
I felt thankful that I was not myself in the boats,
yet my feelings for those that were, were nearly, if
not altogether, as painful, as if I had been in them;
and I believe that this was the case with the most
of the spectators. But while we were thus feeling
for them, we became increasingly astonished to
behold how the boats pressed forwards towards the
shore, although the wind, of which there was a
smart breeze, was against them; how well they
preserved their order under the terrible fire of the
enemy's artillery; and how quickly any disorder
produced by the shot that fell amongst them was
remedied. The painful feelings of anxious apprehension
and suspense experienced by those in
the boats, must have been greatly heightened by
the circumstance, that most of the shells and shot
fired by our war vessels were necessarily fired over
their heads, they being between the vessels and
the enemy: so that an ill-directed shot from their
own ships, was as dangerous to them as one from
the shore; and when buzzing through the air over
them, must have been apprehended as one from
the enemy, about to strike destruction amongst
them.
As the boats approached the shore, the enemy
moved their artillery that was on their right, and
drew it nearer to their centre. It appeared to be
a part of their object, to keep the extreme right of
the boats betwixt their artillery and the war vessels,
and thus prevent the war vessels from having
a clear opening to direct their fire: and indeed all
// File: 115.png
our fire, from all descriptions of vessels, did not
seem to interrupt for a moment that of the enemy,
or to silence a single gun all the time the troops
were rowing to the beach. When they approached
near to it, the enemy having drawn their artillery
from the right, planted it on the top of the
centre height, which now appeared to look directly
down upon the boats: and now came the most
trying moment. From this elevated position they
poured down such a continued fire of shot, shell,
and grape, as made us, who were looking on, apprehend
that few would reach the shore. Some
disorder too appearing among the boats increased
our fears; but at this instant we heard them begin
to cheer, and saw them press forward with redoubled
vigour. We soon observed the right
flank of the boats reach the shore under the centre
height,[#] and the men form immediately on the
beach; while the enemy from the top of the height
poured down grape shot, as well as the fire of musketry
from a line of infantry which was ranged
along it. In a few seconds the 40th flank companies,
and the 23d regiment, were in line; and,
without firing a shot, ascended the height in the
face of the enemy. This movement was clearly
seen by the whole fleet, and attracted all eyes.--The
spectators began to tremble, lest the enemy
should drive them down again; but we were astonished
to see with what rapidity and order they
mounted the steep face of the height. They were
// File: 116.png
soon close to the enemy, and charged them with
loud cheers, when the enemy fled, and in an instant
both parties were out of sight. The 42d regiment,
which had landed and formed, was now
seen ascending the left of the height, and charging
the enemy opposed to them, who also fled and disappeared.
We now turned our attention more to
the left, where part of the troops were forming on
the beach; but the left of the boats had not yet
reached the shore. The enemy, who had been
posted among the smaller sand-hills, as soon as the
boats came near the shore, rushed down into the
water, fired into them, and endeavoured to prevent
their landing. A party of cavalry also charged
those who were in the act of landing, which
produced a temporary confusion; but they were
soon wholly repulsed. All the troops were landed,
and the beach, and the heights that lined it, cleared
of the enemy, I believe, in less than a quarter
of an hour, and nothing to be seen by the spectators,
but the empty boats, hoisting their sails, and
proceeding with all possible speed to receive the
second division. Some of them soon reached the
ship I was in, and with all haste we got into them
and rowed for the shore. On the way I saw some
boats swamped, which had been struck with large
shot; but the men who were in them had been
picked up by the small boats, which followed those
that had troops in them, for this express purpose.
The number of boats, that were seriously damaged,
was small, compared with what might have been
expected; but they were in general less or more
perforated with grape shot and musketry. The
// File: 117.png
boat in which I was had an oar broken, and was
otherwise damaged; but none of the men were
killed or seriously wounded in her.
We soon reached the shore, at a place where it
was deeper than common: and with a leap I landed
dry shod. The first thing I saw, as I passed
along the beach, was some Frenchmen lying dead
within the edge of the water. The beach was
strewed with dead and wounded men, with horses,
and artillery taken from the enemy: but the action
was over. We formed in a hollow on the left of
the centre height, where the 42d had repulsed a
charge of cavalry; some of the 42d, and also of
the cavalry, with their horses, were stretched dead
upon the sand:--we were soon ready, and advanced
through the first range of sand-hills, and found
the first division formed with their artillery, which
had landed along with them, and was drawn by
seamen. This circumstance had materially contributed
to the success of the landing; for the
enemy were astonished to find that our artillery
was landed as soon as the troops, and began to fire
upon them as soon as the musketry of the infantry.
Eight pieces of cannon were taken from the enemy;
but the army lost in this affair, one hundred
and two killed, five hundred and fifteen wounded,
and thirty-five missing; the loss of the navy was
twenty-two killed, seventy-two wounded, and
three missing, making a total of seven hundred
and forty-nine, the greater part of which were killed
or wounded in the boats, previous to landing.
During the course of the day the troops were all
landed; we did not however advance far that day,
// File: 118.png
but took up a position at no great distance from the
shore. Our first concern was to learn whether
water could be got in this sandy desert; and we
were glad to find that it could be obtained in the
hollows, by digging a little way in the sand. When
night came on we stationed our guards, and lay
upon the sand, covering ourselves with our blankets.
This night I was surprised to find that I
could see nothing, and I continued to be in this
state every night, until the night of the 20d: in
the day time I saw as well as ever I did, and had
no pain in my eyes.
On the morning of the 9th our regiment, along
with a party of Corsican riflemen, advanced along
the peninsula about three miles from where we
landed, to a place where it was contracted into
less than half a mile in breadth. Here was a redoubt
and a flag-staff, for communicating signals
betwixt Aboukir castle and Alexandria: but the
enemy had left it, and thrown a large gun, intended
to be mounted on it, into the ditch. In the
course of the day, the 42d regiment and others,
came and occupied this position, and we returned
to our former one, where we remained until the
morning of the 12th, waiting for the landing of
some horses, ammunition, and provisions, from the
fleet. We made booths of the branches of the
date (or palm tree), to shelter ourselves from the
dew, which fell very copiously, and we had sometimes
heavy showers of rain and hail, which made
it pretty cold. The thermometer was frequently
below 50.
On the morning of the 12th, having filled our
// File: 119.png
canteens with water, and furnished ourselves with
three days provisions, the whole army advanced.
Having proceeded a little beyond the narrow neck
of the peninsula, the enemy's cavalry began to
skirmish; our march was slow and often interrupted;
the surface of the ground being very uneven,
the sand very deep, and the day very warm,
parties were frequently sent to assist the seamen
with the guns, and even those guns which had
horses to draw them, were unable to get forward,
for the horses had never been used to the draught,
and were often unmanageable.--Before evening
we came within sight of the enemy's army posted
on a height. Their strength was about 6000 men,
of which 600 were cavalry, with 20 to 30 pieces
of cannon. As it was too late to engage them that
night, we halted, and began to dig for water; for
we had made use of all that we had, and were
now very thirsty. The place where we began to
dig, was a deep soil of black earth, and below it
a clayish mixture. About four or five feet from the
surface, water began to appear in small quantities;
each company dug a well; but before the one to
which I belonged had found water, the regiment
was ordered upon picquet. There was no help
for it. We were posted along the front of the army,
only those who were blind were not put on
sentry, but left in groupes, a little in the rear.
There were nearly twenty of a company in this
condition. We felt very unhappy; for we had to
remain in the spot where we were, until, when it
was necessary to shift our position, some one who
had sight came to conduct us to another place: we
// File: 120.png
then took hold of one another, and were led in a
string; and, had a party of the enemy made a dash
at the place where we were, we were unable either
to have resisted or fled.
On the morning of the 13th we were ordered to
advance in front of the army, to form, along with
the 90th regiment, the advanced guard. We had
no time to procure water, but got a little rum, and
began our march, leaving our knapsacks with a
guard. We had not advanced far, before our
light company, which was in front, came upon the
enemy's picquets, and a skirmishing began, which
increased as we advanced. The light company
was reinforced several times, the enemy's picquets
getting stronger as they retreated, being joined by
those who were in their rear. The ground through
which we marched was interspersed with thick
bushes; but we approached a rising ground, on
which the main body of the enemy's army was
drawn up in order of battle. The ascent to this
height was entirely bare, and also the ground to
the left of it, which projected to Lake Maadie.--Our
regiment kept to the side of the lake; the
90th was on our right; and the army followed us
in two lines. Our parties in front pressed eagerly
upon the enemy's picquets, which caused the regiment
to march pretty quickly, in order to be
near them for their support; and this led us to
get a considerable way in advance of the army,
which could not follow with the same speed.--There
was one nine pounder field-piece, and one
four and a half inch howitzer, along with us; but
very little ammunition with them. Armed launches
// File: 121.png
too had kept pace with the left of the army upon
the lake; but it was now so shallow that they
could not follow us farther.--As soon as the 90th
regiment had cleared the broken ground, and began
to ascend the height on which the enemy's
army was posted, a heavy column of cavalry was
observed coming forward to charge them. The
front section of the 90th halted, and the regiment
formed line with all expedition. The front section
of the enemy's cavalry wheeled, as soon as it
came opposite the right of the 90th, and began to
form line. The two parties formed opposite and
very near each other, but the cavalry line was
formed first. The rear sections of the 90th had
not time to reach the extent of the line, and closed
upon the rear of the left, making it six or eight
deep, but they had a clear view of the horsemen
who were on higher ground. The cavalry advanced
upon them with their swords raised; the
90th stood firm, until the cavalry were so near the
right of their line, that they were going to strike
at them with their swords; they then began to fire,
and it ran from right to left like a rattling peal of
thunder. It was one of the most terrible discharges
of musketry I ever saw; and, from the nearness
of the enemy, it was dreadfully destructive. The
cavalry instantly retreated, and many horses ran
away with empty saddles. During the time of
this transaction, which was over in a few seconds,
our regiment made a momentary pause. On the
retreat of the cavalry we again advanced. The
enemy then began to open their artillery upon us
from the heights. We still pressed on; but as
// File: 122.png
they saw all our movements, and perceived that
we were considerably advanced before the army,
they formed the resolution to attack us with all
their force; and accordingly marched to their right
down the height, and, when on the plain, formed
line, and came forward. When we perceived
their movement, we halted, formed five companies
in line; posted the other five in the rear of scattered
bushes on the left towards the lake, and
awaited their approach. We cannonaded them
with our two pieces, but our ammunition being
soon expended, the guns were drawn into the rear.
During the time that we were advancing, I had
frequently and earnestly prayed to God, to spare
and protect me. Our present situation was one of
imminent danger; part of the enemy's artillery
were playing upon us from the rising ground towards
the right; and in front, the enemy, with
the rest of his artillery, was advancing in great
force, in a line formed like the blade of a scythe,
the curved point to our left on the shore of the lake,
and that part of it appeared to be composed of cavalry.[#]
It seemed to be the enemy's intention to
come round our left, and get into our rear with
that part of their line, while the rest of it attacked
us in front, and out-flanked us on the right, by
which they would have completely surrounded
us, and either destroyed or carried us prisoners,
before the main body of the army could arrive to
assist us. This was their only object. They
were too weak to attack the army on level ground
// File: 123.png
with any hope of success; but they were more than
competent to take or destroy our party, which did
not amount to 500 men. I was near the left of
the line, and beheld the advance of the enemy with
an anxious mind; but as we were standing in a
fixed position, I had some leisure for reflection;
and as death was once more staring me in the face,
I began to inquire "what hope have I for eternity,
if I am cut off at this time?" I confessed my
sins in the words of the 51st Psalm; and besought
God to pardon them, and give me a new heart; I
then thought, "If we are mostly cut down at this
time, and have to appear before God, will he make
no difference between me and those around me,
many of whom, in place of calling upon him, profane
his name?" I then endeavoured to lay hold
on the mercies promised to the penitent and contrite
in heart. I thought I was sorry for my sins,
and confessed them without guile, and on this account
I endeavoured to hope for mercy, thus resting
partly on the difference that I conceived to be
between my own character and that of others, and
partly on my contrition and repentance before
God. But my mind was still dissatisfied; I still
feared the worst; I knew not the merits of a
Saviour's righteousness; my hope was not built
upon him but on myself, and could not be satisfactory.
I therefore cried to God to spare me once
more, and promised that my future life should be
devoted to his service. The Lord was pleased to
hear my cry, and to protect me during the awful
scene that was just about to commence. The
enemy's line had advanced within about 300
// File: 124.png
yards, and brought two-field pieces in front of the
company I was in, and fired them at us. One of
the balls came skimming along the surface of the
ground. I caught a view of it at some distance,
and thought it was coming directly to me. It
grazed a small hillock of rubbish a few yards in
our front, and laid down the second file on my
right. It struck the left leg of the front rank man
in the centre, passing through it, and leaving a
part of the skin on each side. It grazed the calf
of the rear rank man's left leg, tearing it, and carrying
part of it away. The small stones which it
drove from the rubbish-hillock hurt our faces,
and a quantity of them entered into the lacerated
limbs of the wounded like hail. The one whose
leg was broken died some time after he had undergone
amputation; the other also died some months
after in Rosetta. I thought that the hillock of
rubbish had perhaps altered the direction of the
ball, else it might have struck me; and while I
felt for my comrades, I thanked God that I had
escaped.
We were now anxious for orders to commence
firing, as the enemy were still marching forwards;
the ground in front was somewhat undulated, rising
a little, for about 200 yards in our front, and then
gently falling. Our commanding officer allowed
them to advance, as far as to the highest part in
our front; and whenever we saw their feet distinctly,
gave orders to fire. This was eagerly done;
and the moment we began firing, the enemy's line,
in place of rushing forward, and destroying us in
an instant, made a halt from right to left, and
// File: 125.png
opened their fire upon us. As we were most afraid
of the two pieces of artillery in front playing upon
us with grape-shot, those around me directed their
fire chiefly at them, which I believe caused them
to be removed to one of the flanks. We then levelled
at those directly in our front; but the smoke
soon covered them so much, that a particular object
was not visible. We then took aim at where
we judged their line was; but we were not so
much afraid of those directly in our front, as of a
body which appeared to be cavalry, and which
threatened to come round our left into our rear.--In
order to keep them back; those near me directed
nearly the one half of their fire against
them; for we feared that those who were posted
in the rear of the bushes to our left, would not be
able to prevent them from advancing, the bushes
being widely scattered, so that they might have
been easily passed. These men, however, did
their duty most admirably. The enemy opened a
fire of grape-shot, from several pieces of artillery,
to dislodge them; but they bravely maintained their
post. Our ranks were now getting thinner; our
commanding officer, Lieutenant Colonel Erskine,
was severely wounded with grape shot in several
parts of the body.[#] The officer commanding the
company I was in, was also wounded, and many
more.--After we had fired about 12 rounds, whilst
I was in the act of loading, I was struck by a
musket ball in the left side, near the pit of the
// File: 126.png
stomach, close to the ribs, and was whirled round
on my heels by the force of the stroke. I was
stunned and felt great pain; and, concluding that
I was wounded, I stept into the rear and grasped
the place with my hand. I found the skin was
entire; and on shaking myself, the ball dropped at
my feet. I then resumed my place in the ranks,
and continued to fire until I had expended 22
rounds; when to our great joy, a party of marines,
doing duty on shore, arrived on our right, and
Dillon's regiment on our left. At the first fire of
these troops, the enemy retreated with great precipitation.
We pursued them to some distance;
and Dillon's regiment coming up with a party of
them, charged, and took two pieces of cannon.--The
enemy was so closely pressed that he divided
his forces, and part of them retreated to the left,
through a shallow place of the Lake Maadie, the
other part retired direct upon Alexandria. Had
we had a proper proportion of cavalry, we might
have captured all the enemy's artillery, and even
have taken Alexandria itself; for we could have
reached it before that part of the enemy's force
which retreated to the left, as we were nearer it
than they.
The army formed in line on the heights which
the enemy had occupied in the morning: they
cannonaded us, and kept up a fire of sharp-shooters,
by which we lost a number of men. A
division of the army was detached to the left, to a
height near to that of Alexandria; the reserve
advanced on the right, and another division in the
centre. Our regiment was part of the division
// File: 127.png
sent to the left. The day was warm, and we
suffered much from want of water. I have seen a
Spanish dollar offered for a draught, and in many
instances refused. The gunpowder which unavoidably
got into our mouths by biting the ends of
our cartridges while loading, tended greatly to
augment our thirst.
The enemy had now concentrated his forces on
the heights of Alexandria. When he saw our division
advancing to the left, he sent a party with
two guns to cannonade us, and as we advanced
nearer, he opened upon us a heavy fire of shot and
shell. Our order of march was in divisions of
companies; and, as we drew near the height, a
cannon bail struck the ground, close to the right
of the division of the company I was in. The
ground happened to be soft mould; the ball lodged
itself in the mould, and we were covered with
the dust and small fragments of stones which it
raised. It was a great mercy that the ground was
not hard in that spot, as it was in the greatest part
of the adjacent ground; for the ball would in that
case have rebounded, and in all probability have
laid down the front rank of the division. I felt
thankful for deliverance, and continued to pray in
my heart to God to spare and protect me.--We
formed in close columns upon the height. The
bed of a canal, over which was a bridge, lay in
the bottom of the hollow that was betwixt us and
the enemy's position: the bridge was defended by
a party of cavalry and infantry, with two guns.
The 44th regiment, being sent in front, charged
the enemy with the bayonet, and captured the
// File: 128.png
bridge; and the party which defended it retired
into their own lines. During this operation the
columns advanced, and began to descend into the
hollow. Our regiment was in the front, the enemy
played upon us with his artillery, to which we
were now dreadfully exposed; but, after we had
descended some way down the height, we were
ordered to retire; and, as we retreated undercover
of the height, we were partly screened from his
fire. After we had remained in this position some
time, our regiment was allowed to retire to the
rear of the right of the centre division of the army.
This division had been formed in line on the
plain, and being wholly unprotected from the
enemy's shot, had suffered very severely. They
were still in this state; but they had now laid
down their arms, and either sat or lay on the
ground, by which means they were not so much
exposed. We took up our position, and several
men from each company were allowed to go in
quest of water. I was one of them; and, as no
one knew where to find it, we took different
routes. After travelling some distance to the rear,
I got information where water was to be had; and
having made all haste to the spot, I found it, and
instantly began to drink; but I thought I should
never be satisfied. Never was any thing so precious
to me in all my life as this water. After
having drank a considerable quantity, I began to
fill the canteens (of which I had ten) which I had
brought to fetch it to those who remained; but
many a drink I took before I had filled them. I
then began to feel a little hungry, having eaten
// File: 129.png
nothing from the preceding morning, lest it should
increase my thirst. I sat down and took a piece
of biscuit and a bit of pork, and began to eat; but
still every mouthful required a little of the water;
and I wished to be fully satisfied, before leaving
the place, that I might not be under the necessity
of drinking any of what I was carrying away.
The water was white and muddy, but not thick;
it was in a part of what had been the bed of a
canal, or had been hollowed out by torrents coming
from the heights in the winter season, across the
mouth of which a bank had been thrown, which
prevented the water from running into the lake, to
which it was near. Having satisfied my thirst, I
returned with a load of water to my comrades, to
whom it was as acceptable as it had been to myself.
We remained until near sun-set in the same
position; and as the whole army was within reach
of the enemy's shot, he continued less or more to
cannonade us. When our regiment got on their
feet and began to move, they fired at us from two
of their heaviest guns. One of the balls rebounded
from the ground, nearly killed our Major, and
passed through the ranks: those opposite to it saw
it, and were so fortunate as to make an opening,
through which it passed without touching any one.
By sun-set the army took up its position on the
heights from which the enemy had been driven on
the morning, with our right to the sea, and our
left to the canal that separated Lake Maadie from
the bed of Lake Marcotis.--As soon as our position
was adjusted, and we had liberty to pile our arms,
the cry was for more water; and as I had been
// File: 130.png
sent for it before, and knew where it was to be
found, I was sent along with others. It was dusk
before we reached the spot, which now presented
a confused but interesting scene. The cavalry and
artillery horses, which had been all day without
water, were now there, and had gone into it with
their feet, where they were greedily drinking.
This had stirred up the mud, and made the water
a perfect puddle; near the edge it was as thick as
paste. We had therefore to wade in among the
horses to where it was deeper; so that here were
men and horses, standing promiscuously, knee
deep in the water, trying as it were which could
drink fastest. By the time I got my canteens filled,
it was pretty dark; and, owing to the confusion,
as I could not see, I had great difficulty in finding
the regiment.
I now lay down on the ground to take some
rest. I reflected seriously on the events of the
past day, and thanked God for having heard my
prayers, and for having spared and protected me.
I remembered the promises I had made, and my
conscience accused me of having broken them
almost as soon as made. Even during the time of
the action, when many were falling around me,
and my danger was greatest, I had made use of improper
expressions: expressions which I was not
guilty of using at other times, and which, on such
an occasion, above all others, I ought to have
avoided. This threw me into dejection of spirits,
and into a train of very serious reflections for
several days; reflections which were deepened by
my being led to see more minutely the danger I
// File: 131.png
had escaped. Having occasion to shift my clothes,
I observed that the ball which had struck me on
the side, had passed through my coat and cut my
waistcoat between the second and third button
from the bottom; it had then grazed my side, and
had been obstructed in its passage outwards by a
small volume of poems, containing Pope's Essay
on Man, Blair's Grave, and Gray's Elegy, which
I had in my side pocket. The corner of the binding
next to my side was shattered, and the greater
part of the leaves much bruised. I now discerned,
that it had been the force with which the ball
struck the book that had wheeled me round. I
was impressed with the conviction, that if I had
been standing square to my front, the ball would
have lodged in my left side; and that even in the
oblique position in which I stood, had it been one
inch nearer the right, it would have lodged in the
body and proved mortal. There were few of my
comrades that had not their clothes cut in several
places; and many had received contusions that
would have proved mortal wounds, if the French had
properly loaded their pieces. It was said that they
did not use the ramrod in loading, which enabled
them to fire with greater rapidity; but the charge
being loose in their pieces, the shot did not fly so
true to its direction, and was in many cases weak;
making only a contusion, in place of perforating
the body. This partly accounts for such a long
continued and tremendously superior fire, not
being so destructive as might have been apprehended.
The regiment lost 125 killed and wounded;
but our wonder was how so many had escaped.
// File: 132.png
The loss sustained by the army, was 156 killed,
1082 wounded; and of seamen and marines there
were 29 killed and 55 wounded, making a total
of 1322. Four pieces of cannon and some ammunition
were taken from the enemy.
A great part of the grape-shot and cannon balls,
that were fired by the French, were made of a
composition of brass. They had taken the copper-sheeting
and bells of a number of the ships in
the harbour, and the unserviceable brass guns in
their possession, and had melted them into balls,
to prevent their ammunition from being exhausted;
because the blockade of Egypt by our ships of
war, prevented them from receiving regular supplies
from France. But the grape-shot of this
description that lodged in the bodies of the wounded,
had the tendency of making the wounds foul.
I continued to ponder over what had taken
place; and my mind became increasingly uneasy.
Conviction of sin, and a sense of ingratitude to
God for his mercies, drove me almost to despair.
I had my Bible with me, but made no use of it:
our duty and fatigues left almost no leisure to do
so, even had I been so inclined; and the dangerous
nature of our present situation agitated the mind,
and prevented the composure needful for the investigation
of truth. One who previously knew
the spiritual import of the Scriptures, might have
made some profitable use of a Bible; but our circumstances
were quite unfavourable for one like
me. I was left to ruminate upon what occurred to
my memory. I recollected what Manoah's wife said
to her husband, when he was afraid that he should
// File: 133.png
die because he had seen God. "If the Lord were
pleased to kill us, he would not have received a
burnt-offering and a meat-offering at our hands;"
(Judges xiii. 23.) and was led to conclude, that I
ought not to give myself over to despair, seeing
God had yet spared my life. I had also a general
recollection of the following passage of Young's
Night Thoughts:
.pm verse-start
---- Time destroyed
Is Suicide, where more than blood is spilt.
Time flies, death urges, knells call, heav'n invites,
Hell threatens; all exerts: in effort, all;
More than creation labours!--Labours more?
And is there in creation, what, amidst
This tumult universal, wing'd despatch,
And ardent energy, supinely yawns?--
Man sleeps; and Man alone; and Man whose fate,
Fate irreversible, entire, extreme,
Endless, hair-hung, breeze-shaken, o'er the gulf
A moment trembles; drops! and Man for whom
All else is in alarm! Man, the sole cause
Of this surrounding storm! and yet he sleeps,
As the storm rock'd to rest,--Throw Years away?
Throw Empires, and be blameless. Moments seize,--
Heaven's on their wing: a moment we may wish
When worlds want wealth to buy. Bid Day stand still,
Bid him drive back his car, and re-import
The period past; regive the given hour:
Lorenzo, more than miracles we want:
Lorenzo--O for yesterdays to come!
Such is the language of the man awake;
His ardour such, for what oppresses thee:
And is his ardour vain, Lorenzo?--No;
That more than miracle the gods indulge;
To-day is yesterday return'd; return'd
Full-power'd to cancel, expiate, raise, adorn,
And reinstate us on the Rock of peace.
Let it not share its predecessor's fate;
// File: 134.png
Nor, like its elder sisters, die a fool.
Shall it evaporate in fume? fly off
Fuliginous, and stain us deeper still?
Shall we be poorer for the plenty pour'd?
More wretched for the clemencies of heav'n?
Night Second.
.pm verse-end
While I had a general recollection of this passage
on my mind, there were a number of its particular
expressions very frequently in my memory.
When I thought on the past dangers I had come
through, and looked at our present hazardous
situation, the words
.pm verse-start
----"hair-hung, breeze-shaken, o'er the gulf
A moment trembles,"----
.pm verse-end
strongly impressed my mind with a sense of the
critical nature of human life in general, and of
such a situation as I was now in, in particular;
and the words,
.pm verse-start
----"and yet he sleeps,
As the storm rock'd to rest"----
.pm verse-end
with the folly of being careless and unconcerned,
in such a situation; and when I thought on the
misimprovement of past time, the words,
.pm verse-start
----"O for yesterdays to come!"
.pm verse-end
spoke the feelings of my heart:--but the words,
.pm verse-start
"Today is yesterday return'd; return'd
Full-power'd to cancel, expiate, raise, adorn,
And reinstate us on the Rock of peace,"
.pm verse-end
were often in my mind, and contributed, with the
words of Manoah's wife, to give me a partial ease;
they led me to form a new resolution, of setting
// File: 135.png
out once more in attempting to lead a godly life,
and keep the divine commandments. Having
formed this resolution, I set about the performance
of it with all due care, and my mind enjoyed a
temporary peace. I was frequent in prayer, as I
hoped that by this means I should prevent my
mind from wandering. I had taken my present
resolution so strongly, that I thought if I did not
keep it this time, I could never hope to keep any
resolution afterwards.
We now got our tents on shore, and were busily
employed in landing the heavy artillery, and in
raising breast-works and redoubts. The fatigues
of the army were very great; and as nearly the
one half were now affected with the night blindness,
they were ordered to take their turn of night
duties. A blind and a seeing man were put to
work together, to carry two-handed baskets filled
with earth to raise the breast-works, the seeing
one leading the blind; and as the sentries on the
out-posts were double, a blind and a seeing man
were also put together: the blind man was company
to the other; for, although he could not see,
he could hear; and more depended upon that than
upon seeing for the best sight could not see an
object at night at any distance. When upon sentry
at night, I discovered that when I looked a good
while to the ground, I could discern upon it the
shadows of persons that were approaching me; but
if I lifted up my head I could not see the persons
themselves, though they came close to my face. I
continued, when out at night, to look constantly
// File: 136.png
to the ground, and my sight gradually got better,
and was quite recovered by the night of the 20d.
During the march of the army from Aboukir, I
had seen great quantities of ruins; and while employed
in working among them, and in building
breast-works and redoubts with the stones of ancient
palaces, and the earth that formed the banks
of their far-famed canals, I could not but reflect
on the ancient glory of Egypt, of which there were
so many evidences, even in the barren peninsula
of Aboukir. I saw in these ruins the fulfilments
of Jehovah's threatenings, and an evidence of the
truth of the Scriptures;--and from the description
given of "populous No," (Nahum. iii. 8, 9, 10.
Ezekiel xxx. 14, 15, 16, which I had frequently
read during the passage up the Mediterranean,) I
conceived that somewhere in this vicinity, such a
city must have stood. These reflections gave an
unusual degree of interest to our operations. We
were now upon Scripture ground: we had come
from a distant island of the sea, to the land of the
proud Pharaohs, to carry on our military operations
where Nebuchadnezzar, and Alexander the
Great, had carried on theirs. The event was
singular and striking: and our situation novel and
interesting. Our camp stretched from the sea to
the lake; and on the lake were numerous boats,
bringing provisions, ammunition, and military
stores from the fleet; while parties of seamen and
soldiers were carrying or dragging through the
deep sand, the various articles from the landing
place, distant about two miles from the position of
the army. And within four miles of our front,
// File: 137.png
were the heights of Alexandria, upon which the
enemy's troops were posted, with the various forts
which they had constructed for their defence. On
the right of their position stood the beautiful and
majestic column, known by the name of "Pompey's
Pillar;" and towards their left stood the
stately obelisk called "Cleopatra's Needle."[#] The
// File: 138.png
old walls of Alexandria were behind them, over
which the masts of near 200 sail of ships were
visible, which had conveyed the army of Bonaparte
from France, and had been blockaded by
the English since that time. And in the more
distant view to the sea, was the Isle of Pharos, at
the entrance of the harbour, on which once stood
a light-house, mentioned by Rollin in his Ancient
History as one of the seven wonders of the world,
but which was now strongly fortified by the
French, for the protection of the harbour, before
which a squadron of our fleet was kept constantly
cruising.
The Arabs began to bring us sheep and young
onions for sale. The men of the tent I was in,
bought a sheep for a Spanish dollar, from an Arab,
whose only covering was a plaid thrown round
his naked body, resembling those worn by Highland
shepherds. But our greatest difficulty was
to find wood to cook it with. The bark of the
date tree was the only part of it that would burn:
its withered leaves, with the roots of a creeping
kind of brier, which we pulled out of the sandy
soil, and with difficulty got to burn, were the only
fuel we could find. For a few days we had far to
travel for water; but every regiment dug wells in
the flat ground, on the left of the position, where
// File: 139.png
a sufficient supply, although somewhat brackish,
was obtained.
My mind continued pretty easy for three or four
days; but I found that I was not fulfilling the task
that I had undertaken; that I was failing in the
performance of duty, and was not keeping God
and eternity in view, in the manner I had resolved
to do. This began to make me again uneasy; and,
as my hopes rested on my own performances,
when I found that these performances were not
what I had promised and resolved they should be,
these hopes were shaken. I had not, indeed, been
guilty of any open and notorious sins; but I had
not done that which I had resolved to do, and on
the doing of which I had hoped for the forgiveness
of past sins, the favour of God, and eternal life;
and this threw me back where I was before.
The regiment received orders on the 20d, to
march early next morning to Aboukir, to do the
hospital duty, because we were too weak to do
the duty of a regiment in the line. We were accordingly
under arms and marched off an hour before
daylight, and left our tents standing for a
regiment that was to come from the second line
to occupy our place. But we had not proceeded
above a mile and a half, when we heard a discharge
of several muskets on the left; which
caused us to halt and look to the place where the
firing had been. In a few seconds we saw a
number more muskets fired, (for the darkness
made the flash of even the pan of every musket
distinctly visible,) and after that a field-piece, and
then a general discharge of about 300 muskets;
// File: 140.png
when it ceased. We knew that there was a guard
of about 300 men, and a field-piece, with a working
party of as many more, on the spot; and as the
firing had ceased, we thought it might be a false
attack to disturb the working party and alarm the
army.--After standing a little, and all continuing
quiet, we began with hesitation to proceed on our
journey: but we had not moved many steps, when
we heard the discharge of a musket on the right
of the army: this produced a voluntary halt; and
in a few seconds we heard the discharge of two
or three more. We were then ordered to return,
and had not proceeded far, before a number more
discharges were heard in the same direction. This
quickened our march, and we made all expedition
towards the tent of the commander-in-chief, which
was in the rear of the right of the army. Before
we got there the firing on the right was beginning
to be pretty thick. We were now ordered to resume
the position we had left. It was yet dark;
but the firing of musketry began to be heavy, and
the artillery commenced playing, with the help of
lighted lanterns to let them see to load. By the
time we got to our position, the action was close
and warm on the right, and the firing of musketry
and artillery very heavy, which the darkness of
the morning made peculiarly awful. There was
now no doubt of a powerful and determined attack
from the enemy. When we arrived at our position
in the line, the day had begun faintly to dawn.
The regiment which was to have taken our place,
had not done it; a column of the enemy having
ascended the brow of the hill in our front, were
// File: 141.png
making towards the opening in the line where we
should have been. The regiment on the right
was extending its left, and the one on the left its
right, and had filled up the one half of the space
when we arrived. On our arrival a part of us
filled up the opening, and began to fire on the
enemy's column, which then retreated under the
brow of the hill, out of our sight and below the
range of shot. They left, however, a number
of sharp-shooters on the edge of the hill, who
kept up a straggling fire upon our line. The
regiments on the right and left now closed their
files, and we got all into line, and in good order;
when the enemy's column, having adjusted itself
under the brow of the hill, showed itself anew,
and came forward to the attack. We again opened
our fire upon them, which they returned; but
after the second or third round, they again retreated
as before, leaving a still greater number of
sharp-shooters, who ranged themselves along the
edge of the descent of the hill, which in part concealed
them from us, but allowed them to have a
fair view of our line, upon which they kept up a
destructive fire. We returned a straggling fire
upon them from the line, having no sharp-shooters
in front to engage them.
When on the way back to the army, previously
to entering upon this action, the state of my mind
was rather different from what it had been before.
I prayed earnestly for protection: but having so
often failed in the promises I had made, I was
afraid to make any more. I began to be diffident
of myself. I did not plead with God on the promise
// File: 142.png
of future amendment, but prayed for mercy.
I used indeed the name of Christ; but had no right
understanding, either of the true nature of the
atonement for the guilt of sin, by his blood, or of
his righteousness to justify the ungodly. My confidence
was not placed in them for acceptance
with God; but should death be the issue, I cast
myself, with trembling hesitation, on his general
mercy, and that with more resignation than formerly.
I confessed my past failures, and prayed that
if God was not pleased to preserve me unhurt, but
if I was to be wounded, it might be in a merciful
way; and that, if death was to be the issue, my
sins might be pardoned. This was my prayer on
entering the action, and as we had intervals of
firing, I repeated it. But great as my fear of
death was, I never thought of attempting to avoid
it, by flinching from my duty as a soldier in such
times of danger. I looked upon such conduct as
sinful, and dared not seek present safety by an increase
of guilt. I was also convinced, that cowardice
was attended with the greatest danger, and
that our greatest safety lay in every one doing his
duty with steady courage. I had fired about twelve
rounds, when the sun was beginning to appear in
the horizon, and was in the act of ramming another
cartridge, when a shot from one of the sharp-shooters,
struck upon the inner ancle bone of my left
foot; it turned round the back of the leg, passing
between the sinew of the heel and the leg bone,
and lodged just under the skin, a little above the
bone of the outer ancle. It was there that I felt
the pain. I was stunned with the stroke; but from
// File: 143.png
the part in which I felt the pain, I did not think it
was a ball, but that a large shot or shell, having
struck some of the stones that were lying in the
rear, a splinter from them had hit me in the back
of the leg: I loaded my piece, and then, on lifting
up my leg to see what was the matter, saw a
musket-shot hole in the half-gaiter, and some appearance
of blood. I shouldered my piece, but
the sharp-shooters directly in front of me had disappeared.
I stood a few seconds unresolved what
to do; but feeling the pain increase, and seeing
the blood beginning to appear more on the gaiter,
and the officer commanding the company having
come to the rear, and observing that I was
wounded, he called to me to fall out, and I was
induced to leave the ranks, but felt very reluctant
to quit my comrades before the battle was decided:
not that I loved to stay in a place of danger; but
I did not like to leave them in the time of it; and
had there been firing at the time, I should have
continued to fire while I was able. As matters
stood, however, I conceived it to be my duty, seeing
I was disabled from keeping my place in the
ranks, to make the best of my way, as long as I
was able, to a place where I might be out of the
reach of shot, and get my wound dressed, that it
might not receive injury by delay. I got as quickly
as I could to the rear, keeping my arms, accoutrements,
and knapsack which I had on when wounded.
The battle at this time was raging upon the
right with terrible fury; and the brigade of guards
immediately on the right of ours, were closely engaged.
The roar of the artillery was dreadful.
// File: 144.png
Daylight had now made both parties visible to
each other; but the smoke of the firing obscured
the distant view; so that, although the scene of
contest was but a short way off from me, I could
neither see our own line nor that of the enemy,
all being covered with a thick cloud, through
which nothing was visible, but the dark red glare
of the flashes of the artillery. As I began to descend
the height in the rear of the army, I was in
imminent danger. The position of the brigade of
guards, (which was on the right of ours,) and of
the right of our own brigade, receded considerably
from the spot on which our regiment stood, owing
to the direction of the rising ground on which we
were posted. In consequence of this, and of the
positions of the enemy's columns and artillery, a
large proportion of his shot, that had been fired at
too high an elevation, fell in the rear of our regiment's
tents. As I did not at the time observe
this circumstance, I took the direct road from our
own rear, to the landing place on Lake Maadie,
distant about two miles. I was led by this route
to cross the range of the falling shot. The musket
and grape shot was coming down in showers, and
further on, the large shot was striking and rebounding
off the ground in rapid succession. I used
all possible exertion to get through this danger;
and, by the goodness of God, received no further
hurt; while others, who, like myself, were wounded
and retiring to the rear, did not escape. The
exertion I had made, with the blood I was losing,
which marked my steps in the sand, began to
exhaust me; but I had the happiness of having
// File: 145.png
my canteen full of water at the commencement
of my retreat, which refreshed me. My arms, at
length, however, becoming too heavy for me, I
left my firelock in an erect posture, by running
the bayonet into the ground, after taking the powder
out of the pan, to prevent accidents to those
that might find it.
When I had got near to the landing place, I
found several surgeons, on the outside of an hospital
tent that had been lately pitched for the sick,
busily engaged in dressing some of the wounded
that had arrived before me. I sat down to wait
my turn to be dressed, which was not long, for the
number before me was not great. When I took
the gaiter off my leg, I pulled a piece of it out of
the wound, and as the ball appeared prominent
under the skin, it was easily extracted, and another
piece of the gaiter was taken out, which was wrapped
round it. The ball was flattened, and a part
of it turned over by the resistance of the ancle
bone; yet the bone was not broken. After I was
dressed, I lay down at the side of a bush, until I
might learn what was to be done with the wounded.
By this time the firing of musketry had ceased
on the field of battle; a cannonade alone was
heard; and we were all anxiety respecting the
success of the day, for if the army was compelled
to retreat, the situation of the wounded would be
distressing and dangerous. Great numbers of
wounded were now arriving to be dressed, who
brought different reports, some of them saying,
they did not think that the army would be able to
keep its ground. This made us look with anxiety
// File: 146.png
to the heights, to observe if any retrograde motion
was made; but the cannonade ceased; and we
were informed that the enemy had been completely
repulsed, and had retreated back to Alexandria.
The action terminated about ten o'clock,
A. M.
This action, though short, was severe and bloody,
and was sustained on our part chiefly by the right
wing of the army, the left having been only partially
engaged. The object of the enemy was to
dislodge the troops on the right, from the rising
ground on which they were posted, and then to
drive the army into Lake Maadie. He expected
to possess himself of the rising ground before day-break;
and being perfectly acquainted with the
place, and with the way in which we were posted,
he was at no loss to make his attack in the dark:
but as it was our practice to stand under arms from
three o'clock in the morning till an hour after day-break,
we were not taken by surprise. The enemy's
force consisted of nine thousand seven hundred
men, of which fifteen hundred were cavalry;
with forty-six pieces of cannon. Our army, by its
losses in the former actions, by parties absent at
Aboukir on duty, and by sickness, had been reduced
to somewhat less than ten thousand, including
four hundred cavalry; with thirty-six pieces
of cannon. When the enemy retreated, he left
seventeen hundred men dead and wounded on the
field, of whom a thousand and forty were buried
the first two days: he lost also four hundred horses.
How many wounded retired, or had been removed,
could not be known; but military judges calculate
// File: 147.png
the whole at about four thousand men, which was
more than a third of their whole number. We
had two hundred and forty-three killed, one thousand
one hundred and ninety-three wounded, and
thirty-two missing, and four seamen killed, and
twenty wounded, making a total of 1493.--Our
worthy commander-in-chief, Sir Ralph Abercrombie,
died on the 28th, of a wound he received in
the thigh, and was deeply regretted by the whole
army. General Moore also was again wounded,
but recovered in a short time and returned to his
duty. The loss of our regiment was forty men.
Having lain at the bush until about two o'clock,
I then observed a number of the wounded going
on board of boats to be taken to the fleet. I got
up and went to the landing place, and having got
on board one of them, arrived at the fleet in the
evening; where I was put on board a two-decked
ship, appropriated for the reception of the wounded,
and got into a berth with two more of the same
regiment. Upwards of two hundred wounded men
were collected on board of this ship; and the
wounds of many of them being severe, numbers
died during the first ten days. If any one wishes
to know what were the topics of conversation
among so many men in such circumstances, it
pains me to state, that our conversation was about
any thing but that one thing which most concerned
us, and which ought to have engrossed our
whole attention. About that world to which so
many of us were daily departing, and about that
God before whom so many were so soon to make
their appearance, there was not a word to be
// File: 148.png
heard, except it was in taking his name in vain.
The groans of the dying were to be heard in
various quarters of the ship, but no one either
asking or telling how a sinner could be saved.
Nor was I better than others. I did not improve
my mercies. I had been wounded in a comparatively
merciful manner, but I forgot the God to
whom I had made my supplication, and neglected
my Bible. I conversed with one of my comrades,
who was a Scottish Episcopalian, upon church
government, and he took some pains to inform me
of the claims of Episcopacy, of which I was ignorant.
But what did such topics avail to dying
men, whose conversation ought to have been about
the salvation of their souls? He was badly wounded
in the thigh, and did not live many weeks. The
part of my wound where the ball entered healed
in about sixteen days; but the part where it was
extracted became inflamed, and the foot and ancle
swelled considerably. I was suspicious that the
dirty water with which it was sometimes washed
was the occasion of the inflammation. An erroneous
opinion was entertained, that salt water
would smart the wounds: and as fresh water was
not in plenty on board the ship, only a small quantity
of it was allowed for washing them. A great
number were washed with one basin-full, and, as
many of the wounds were foul, this was calculated
to infect those that were clean. Had salt water
been used, a basin of clean water might have been
taken to every one. I was washed with salt water
when in the hospital at Aboukir, and felt no difference
between it and fresh. By the end of three
// File: 149.png
weeks my wound began to mortify. I was then
put into a boat to be taken to the hospital at
Aboukir, along with a number more whose cases
were considered bad. Two were so weak that
they were unable to sit, and were laid upon
gratings in the bottom of the boat: one of them
died before we reached the shore, and the other
died upon the beach. These cases made little impression
upon my mind; death was becoming
familiar to me, and I looked at it with a careless
indifference. When the boat reached the shore I
was carried to the Hutts hospital; which was a
building upon a height, erected by the French to
serve as barracks to their troops stationed at
Aboukir.
It was formed of the trunks of date trees split
down the middle; the ends were sunk into the
ground; the flat side of one tree was turned outwards,
and the flat side of the next inwards, and
so alternately, the round edges being made to
overlap each other, and the crevices filled with
plaster lime. It was roofed in the same manner.
A great many bats had formed their nests in the
holes, where the roof rested upon the upright
posts.--Here I was well taken care of; so that by
the mercy of God, the inflammation subsided, and
in sixteen days the putrid flesh was wholly cleaned
away, leaving a pretty large orifice. A part of the
tendon of the heel seemed to have been eaten
away by the inflammation, but the damage did not
appear to be very serious, and it began to heal
rapidly.
While in this place, a small scorpion had got
// File: 150.png
into my haversack, and as I put my hand into it
to get some bread it stung me in the point of my
thumb. This sensation resembled that which is
produced by the sting of a bee, but the pain was
more violent, and lasted for twenty-four hours before
it subsided, but was attended by no other bad
consequence.
The regiment to which I belonged, being at this
time encamped at Aboukir, made an offer to
accommodate their own wounded men, as the
general hospital was crowded. This offer was
accepted, and those that were in a condition to be
moved were sent to the regimental hospital. I
remained a day or two there; but, being healthy,
and my wound likely to heal soon, I was removed
to the convalescent tents, which, on account of
some cases of fever in the regimental hospital,
were at some distance. There I was left to dress
my wound myself, which continued to mend, but
not so rapidly as before. That dreadful calamity,
the plague, made its first appearance at the Hutts
hospital about the time that I left it; and, a few
days afterwards, a corporal went with a party and
buried a surgeon and two women in one hole, and
seven others in another, that had already fallen
victims to it.
The strength that the enemy brought to the
field on the 21st March, showed that they were
far more numerous in Egypt than we had been
led to believe. The greatest number that had been
calculated to be there was 15,000; but they had
27,000. As soon as the action of the 21st was
over, the army made trenches along the whole position,
// File: 151.png
and completed and increased the batteries
and redoubts with all possible haste. The left
was the weakest part of the position. The bed
of Lake Mareotis was in front of it, but it was
nearly dry, and passable in many parts both for
horse and foot. Lake Maadie[#] was in the rear
of the left, being only separated from the bed of
Lake Mareotis by the banks of the canal[#] of
Alexandria; and its waters were considerably
above the level of Lake Mareotis and the surrounding
country. On the 13th April a large
opening was made in the banks of the canal; the
water rushed into Lake Mareotis with a fall of
six feet, and it continued to rush in for a month,
when it nearly found its level; but there continued
always a fall of about a foot, owing to the sand
absorbing the water. By this measure a large
extent of country was inundated; the front of the
position was contracted, and the left protected
from assault; and Lord Hutchison, who had succeeded
// File: 152.png
Sir Ralph Abercrombie, was enabled to
proceed with a part of the army to Rosetta, which
had been previously taken by a detachment, assisted
by 4,000 Turks; General Coote being left
with the remainder to blockade Alexandria. The
force assembling at Rosetta was destined to march
against Grand Cairo. The Grand Vizier was
advancing with an army from Syria to co-operate
in the same object. Our regiment was ordered to
join the troops at Rosetta. Most of the men belonging
to it, who had been left on board ship
sick of the fever, at the time we landed, had by
this time recovered, so that it was now pretty
strong. I continued in the convalescent tents
about a fortnight. To enable me, when necessary,
to go abroad, I procured a rough piece of wood,
upon which I got the head of a tent mallet fastened,
to serve for a crutch. By the help of this,
and a stick in the other hand, I made a shift to
go out of the tent; but, not being very expert at
the use of the crutch, as I was going out one day,
the tent cords catched the lower end of it, and I
fell down, with the wounded leg undermost. This
was to me a serious accident; for my wound immediately
began to get worse, and in a few days
it was greatly inflamed, and discharging black
matter. I was then removed to the hospital tents,
to be near the surgeon. Orders came for the regimental
hospital to be moved to Rosetta, and such
cases as were not fit to be moved were sent to the
general hospital, which was now an extensive
establishment; for the sick and wounded that
were on board the fleet were sent on shore, and
// File: 153.png
lodged in large sheds. Into one of these I was
taken, along with another, who had been in the
same convalescent tent with me. He had been
slightly wounded: a musket ball having grazed
the front of his leg; he was able to walk about
with little inconvenience, and was desired by the
surgeon not to confine himself close to the tent, but
to take the air, and some little exercise. We were
not, however, aware of the extreme danger of
having the skin broken in Egypt, let the hurt be
ever so slight. His wound had got much worse;
it was not to appearance so serious as mine, yet,
after he was a few days in the general hospital, it
was found necessary to amputate his leg, an operation
which he did not survive long; for the
stump mortified, and he died after lingering about
five weeks. His case alarmed me not a little; and
as my wound continued for some time to get worse,
the inflammation spreading, the lower part of the
leg swelling greatly, and the pain being excessive,
I was the more apprehensive, and prayed earnestly
for mercy. God was pleased to hear my cry, and
to spare me once more. The inflammation by and
by subsided; the pain became moderate, my appetite,
which was lost, returned; and the wound
began to clean and heal.
The weather was now very warm. The shed
in which I was, was so constructed, as to combine
the advantages of shade and air. The roof
was formed of boards, (brought I suppose from
Marmorice,) and was supported upon posts, made
of the trunks of date trees, which were sunk into
the ground at certain distances; boards were nailed
// File: 154.png
to these posts, and about an inch left open betwixt
each board, to the height of about four feet,
and then there was an opening of about two feet
to the edge of the roof. This shed was of great
length, and was crossed by one or two similar
ones. In them all there were three rows of beds,
two rows with the ends of the beds to the sides of
the shed, and one row set length-ways in the
centre. Although these structures were so open
in the sides we were sufficiently warm during the
night. We were, however, much troubled with
fleas, of which the sandy floor was full, so that it
was impossible to get rid of them. Indeed the
whole of the desert was full of these vermin.
There were also some crickets of a very large
size, which interrupted our sleep by the strong
and constant sound of their music; not unmelodious
in itself, had it not been unseasonable. The
flies too gave us a vast deal of annoyance through
the day. It was with difficulty that we could
keep them out of our eyes; and they were most
pernicious to those who had large putrid sores;
for, as it was impossible to keep them out of the
wound while it was dressing, this occasioned not
only present trouble, but the breeding of maggots,
which increased the torture of many who were
sinking to the grave. Even those who were well,
of all classes, found it needful to carry a small
bunch of rushes tied upon a handle, to be used
like a fan, to drive them away.
On the 23d of May, the hot wind came on.
The air was darkened with mist, which was so
thick that it rendered breathing difficult. We
were glad to cover ourselves over the head with
// File: 155.png
our blankets: for although the heat was intense,
and the blankets disagreeably warm and heavy,
yet we found our breathing more tolerable under
them than when uncovered. The orderly men,
who had to go out of the shed for water, and on
other necessary business, complained of the heat
of the wind, saying that it blew the sand in their
faces as hot as fire.[#] Towards evening the wind
// File: 156.png
blew from the sea; the air became clear; and the
night was about its usual coolness. But the consequences
of this wind were dreadful to the hospital.
The plague now raged with redoubled fury,
and made fearful havoc among the nurses and
orderly men, and those who had slight wounds.
The three nurses who attended the division of the
shed I was in, were infected one after the other,
and were sent to the post hospital; where, as I
afterwards heard, they died. One set of nurses
and orderly men followed another in rapid succession
for some weeks. It was observed, that
none of those who had large sores were infected
by it; but such sores after this period were more
mortal, for mortifications now became rapid in
their progress, and baffled the power of medicine
to arrest them. Amputations were multiplied, but
were mostly unavailing; and even sores comparatively
slight, mortified and proved fatal. Some of
the cases struck me forcibly.--A sailor who had
a slight wound in one of his legs, and who could
move about, and be serviceable to those that were
bed-fast, went one night to the shore, which was
not far off, to get some drink; his leg immediately
got worse; in a few days the entire calf of it was
one putrid ulcer, with numbers of maggots; poultices,
spirits of wine, and other strong liquors, and
tinctures were profusely used, but in vain--he
died in about a week. Another, whose wound was
cured, and who was ordered to join his regiment,
absented himself on the night previous to the day
appointed for his departure, and that of some
others. In a day or two after the party was gone,
// File: 157.png
he appeared in his place with a sore leg. It was
believed that he had purposely scratched his shin
with a stone; but whatever way he had taken to
make it sore, the surgeon, who had not noticed
his conduct, saw that it required dressing, which
was done without any particular inquiry; and as
none that knew his conduct liked spontaneously to
inform upon him, he was not called in question.
It was manifest, however, that cowardice was the
cause of his injuring his leg, that he might remain
in the hospital until danger was over. But the
very means he took to avoid danger, to which he
might never have, been exposed, proved his destruction.
In three or four days his leg became so
much inflamed, that amputation was rendered
necessary. This was performed above the knee,
but the inflammation had reached the thigh. As
he lay nearly opposite to me, I saw the face of the
stump when it was dressed. The skin never
united; at the second or third dressing the flesh
of the thigh was detached from the bone; so much
so, that there was a large cavity underneath the
bone, which made it visible almost to the joint.
He died before next day, being about ten or twelve
days from the time, he appeared with his leg sore.
At my left hand lay a young man, a sailor belonging
to the Northumberland 74, with a large ulcer
in the under side of his right arm, a little below
the arm pit. I formed an attachment to this young
man; took a note of his own and his mother's
name, and place of residence, and of the time
when his wages became due; and promised, if I
got safe to England, to inform them of these particulars,
// File: 158.png
and of the time and circumstances of his
death, for he was sensible that death was near.
But there is one thing that gives me no small
pain, when I reflect upon it, to this day; that, although
I saw he was dying, I was not able, with
all the religion I thought I had, to point my dying
comrade to the Saviour. Not having found a
Saviour to my own soul, whatever I might say
about religion or religious subjects, a Saviour, properly
so called, was no part of my system. I who
never beheld Jesus, as the Lamb of God which
taketh away the sin of the world, could not point
him out, in that soul-reviving character, to others;
neither did there appear to be in this house of death,
any one that could point his dying comrades to a
Saviour, nor any among the dying throng, that
were asking after a Saviour. Whatever emotions
might be passing through the minds of any, the
question as to what became of the soul after death,
the hope of heaven, or the fear of hell, the way
to attain the one and escape the other, never became
a subject of conversation; and yet if ever
circumstances, (short of those of criminals condemned
to die, without any hope of mercy, upon
a particular day,) could have forced such conversation
upon a company of sinful mortals, it must
have been the circumstances we were in. But
every one seemed to indulge the hope of life, until
the cold hand of death was already on his heart,
and left him little time to think of that world to
which he was going, and less ability to communicate
his thoughts to others, or to ask, or to receive
information. And this was the case, not in this
// File: 159.png
hospital only, but in all the hospitals I was in,
both before and afterwards. I did indeed say a
few words to my dying comrade, about praying
for mercy to his soul, and made use of the name
of Jesus in a formal way; and he continued for
several days before his death, to pray very earnestly
to God for mercy, and made use of that name:
but whether he understood the character of Jesus
as a Saviour, and was led to place his dependence
upon his merits, is more than I can tell. It may
be, that the Spirit of Christ, in his sovereign
grace, gave him a saving knowledge of that name
that was used at first in ignorance, and led him to
trust in him for salvation; but if this was the case,
it was known only to himself; he was unable to
make it known to others; and, although he had
been able to tell me if I asked, I was unable to
discern it; for he that has not been enlightened
by the Spirit of Christ himself, and brought out of
darkness into marvellous light, is ill qualified to
discern when that change takes place upon others.[#]
.fn #
I quote these words from Sir R. Wilson's history, which
contains a degree of knowledge that I could not pretend
to. The statements which I give of the strength of the
enemy, the number of cannon they had on the field on
the different days, and what we took from them, I also
state upon his authority. The account of the losses of the
army I take from the statements in the gazettes, which I
believe to be pretty correct, for I have found that they
gave a true account of the loss of my own regiment, and I
have heard soldiers of other regiments say the same of the
gazette accounts of the loss of theirs.
.fn-
.fn #
The boats had gradually verged to the left during their
progress, so that this height, which before appeared to be
opposite their centre, was now opposite their right.
.fn-
.fn #
It was afterwards said that it was the dromedary corps.
.fn-
.fn #
He was taken on board one of the ships in the fleet,
and had one of his legs amputated, but he died in a few
days, and was buried on shore, at Aboukir.
.fn-
.fn #
For the information of such readers as have not access
to large works, I will take the liberty of inserting an account
of the dimensions of these celebrated and ancient
monuments, from Sir R. Wilson's history.
"Pompey's Pillar is of the Corinthian order, and eighty-eight
feet six inches in height; the shaft formed of a single
block of granite, retaining the finest polish, except where
the wind on the north-east front has chafed the surface a
little; it is sixty-four feet in height, and eight feet four
inches in diameter.
"About thirty yards in the rear of the French intrenchments,
stands Cleopatra's Needle, and one of equal magnitude
is lying close by, horizontally. The form of these
obelisks is of considerable elegance, and their magnitude
is enormous, considering that each is only one piece of
granite; their height is sixty-eight feet three inches, and
their base seven feet seven inches by seven feet square;
their sides are covered with hieroglyphics, which, on the
eastern front of the one that is upright, are much effaced
by the wind.
"Tradition affirms that they ornamented the gate of Cleopatra's
palace. From the quantity of marble, &c. &c. found
near the spot, probably the residence of the sovereigns of
Egypt was placed there."--History of the Expedition, 2d vol.
pp. 156, 158, 159.
Dr. E. D. Clark, the traveller, who has paid great attention
to the study of the age and design of ancient monuments,
thinks that the shaft of Pompey's Pillar "is of much
earlier antiquity than either the capital or the pedestal."
He gives probable reasons to believe that the shaft was
made in the time of Alexander the Great, the founder of
Alexandria, and who was buried there, to be a sepulchral
pillar to the memory of that monarch; but that Julius Caesar
had set it upon a pedestal, and had put a capital upon it in
honour of Pompey, whose head he caused to be burnt with
funeral honours, and the ashes put into an urn, and placed
on the top of the pillar: but that the pillar had likely fallen
afterwards, and had been restored by the emperor Hadrian.--Clarke's
Travels, 4th Edit. 8vo. vol. v. ch. vii. p.
361, &c.
.fn-
.fn #
Or Sed; "sometimes called the Lake of Aboukir. The
passage into it at Aboukir, is about two hundred yards
wide, and was made about the year 1782, by the sea
breaking down the dyke, which had been built ages back,
to recover from the ocean that part of the country which
now is Lake Maadie." History of the Expedition to Egypt,
p. 27.
.fn-
.fn #
This canal commences at Rhamanieh, on the banks of
the Nile, and passes over fifteen or sixteen leagues of
country. The bed of it is above the level of Egypt; the
banks are formed of earth raised wholly above the surface.
There is no water in it, but at the time of the inundation
of the Nile. The beds of the canals in Egypt are all above
the level of the country, that, when cut, the water may
run out of them. They are properly canals of irrigation.
.fn-
.fn #
This wind was still more dreadful in the interior of
the country; and at the place where the army was on its
march to Cairo; as appears by the following extract from
Sir R. Wilson's History of the Expedition to Egypt, vol. 1.
p. 177.
ALGUM, 23d May.
"This day will ever be remarkable to the Egyptian
army; a sirocco wind darkened with a burning mist the
atmosphere; the thermometer was at 120 in the shade; the
ground was heated like the floor of a furnace; every thing
that was metallic, such as arms, buttons; knives, &c. became
burning hot; the poultry, exposed to the air, and
several horses and camels died; respiration was difficult,
and the lungs were parched with fiery particles. Had the
heat continued forty-eight hours, the effect would have
been dreadful: but happily as night drew on, the wind
cooled, and at last changed to the north west.
"At Balbeis, the thermometer was at 130; on the western
side of the Nile 120; at Alexandria 105."
Extract from a Journal written by one of my comrades.
"We had one day's hot wind from the south; it began
to blow about 9 o'clock; and wo be to him that is far from
shelter, as neither man nor beast can survive it three days!
It came from the desert as hot as the opening of an oven
door, bringing small sand like mist along with it. All the
sentinels were called in, and the cattle crept close to the
ground and groaned for fear. The buffaloes took to the
river, covering themselves, all but the nose, in the water;
and no man was able to stir out of his tent until the evening."
.fn-
.fn #
The promise that I made of informing his relatives of
the time and circumstances of his death, I fulfilled when I
came to Ireland, for which I received a letter of thanks
from his brother.
.fn-
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap6
CHAPTER VI.
.sp 2
Preparations having been made for erecting
a general hospital in the town of Rosetta, all that
were capable of being removed from Aboukir were
// File: 160.png
sent there. I left Aboukir, and was taken on
board of a Germ on the 23d June; which sailed
in the afternoon; and at day-break next morning,
we were near the entrance of the Rosetta branch of
the Nile. The surf on the bar, at the mouth of the
river, was high; but the Arabs, who navigated the
vessel, risked the passage. The hazard on such occasions
is considerable, owing to the surf, and the
shallowness of the water on the bar: for the vessel
is in danger of striking on the bottom between the
surges; and, when this takes place, the next wave
that comes is apt either to break over her and fill
her with water, or to overset her.--When we came
opposite that part of the bar, which the Arabs
thought deepest, they pointed the bow of the vessel
to it, and clued up the sails that she might
have little pitch, and might float as level as possible;
they then got out hand poles; and, as soon as
she began to lose head-way, they set the poles to
the bottom, and pushed her forward with all their
power, making a great noise, until we got over
the bar into smooth water. There were several
masts of vessels visible near where we passed, that
had recently been swamped in this dangerous passage.
Many British seamen lost their lives here,
for they were ignorant of its real danger, and
would hardly be convinced of it, because it had
not at a distance a very dangerous appearance. It
was not until they had actually got upon the bar,
that the extent and nature of the danger were perceivable;
and then, to attempt to return against
the wind and surge is vain; they must push
through or perish. At the first I wondered why
// File: 161.png
the Arabs were making so much noise; but when
we came upon the bar my surprise ceased. I had
never seen any thing like it; yet the wind was not
stormy, and if such was the state of this place
with a moderate wind, how terrible must it be in
a storm.--As soon as we were in smooth water,
the large sails were again spread out to the wind,
we passed rapidly up the Nile, and in a short time
were at Rosetta.
I was soon taken into a large square building,
having a square court in the centre, and piazzas
round about from the bottom to the top; the ground
flat, which was high in the roof, was occupied as
cellars, store-houses, &c. There were two flats
above, the various apartments of which communicated
with piazza'd passages, round the centre
square. This building, from the largeness of its
size, and the number of its apartments, accommodated
a great many patients, consisting of men
of all the different regiments, promiscuously lodged
together.
In coming into a place of this kind, among so
many strange faces, and various and opposite characters,
it is a matter of some consequence to meet
with some one previously known, to whom you
can talk, in whom you can place confidence, and
who will act the part of a comrade. In this respect
I was fortunate; falling in with a man of my own
company, whose bed was next to mine: a young
man of agreeable dispositions. He was the rear
rank man of the second file from my right, in the
battle of the 13th March, who got the calf of his
leg grazed by the cannon ball, as formerly related.
// File: 162.png
His leg was now in a hopeful way; and being able
to move about with the help of a stick, he was
serviceable to me who was confined to bed. In
this building we were more cool than on the
sands of Aboukir; the flies were not so excessively
troublesome through the day; and as the floor,
which was upon arches, was paved with flat stones,
or large bricks, the fleas were not so numerous.
But a new enemy attacked us during the night,
which we had not met with before--the mosquitoes.
They were very troublesome; and there
was no way of securing ourselves from their bite,
which was very sharp, and for a while had an inflammatory
effect; so much so, that every one for
some time after his arrival, resembled a person in
the height of the measles. Our accommodation
and attendance were much better here in many
respects. We were provided with sheets for our
beds, which was very agreeable; for a sheet was
as much as one could bear for a covering during
the night; nor was even that needed so much for
heat, as to be a partial defence against the musquitoes.
Our woollen blankets, which would have
been quite uncomfortable from their heat, were
very useful now to put under us; for our beds
being made of branches of the date tree, put across
each other, with a slender matt, made of a particular
kind of rushes, laid over them to cover the
holes, the cross spars soon became prominent, and
were very uneasy to lie upon. My knapsack was
my pillow, and my blanket, folded four-ply, I put
under me. Without it indeed, it would not have
been possible to lie in the beds; and even with it,
// File: 163.png
they were very uncomfortable, especially for those
who were long and close confined to them.
I had not been in Rosetta above a fortnight,
when my wound again inflamed and mortified in
a most alarming degree; the leg swelled excessively,
and the wound became large and jet black,
with a most offensive smell. I was very much
alarmed; I beheld many dying, whose wounds
were in a similar state, and some of them
apparently not so bad; the severity of pain deprived
me of appetite: nor could I so much as
drink the wine that was allowed me. The pain
continued to increase; the discharge from the
wound was great; I was reduced to a skeleton, and
my strength was failing fast; I was at the gates of
death; and, with eternity before me, I was destitute
of that discernment of the merits and grace of
the Great Redeemer, which alone can form a sure
ground of confidence, and a true source of consolation
to a poor sinner, ready to perish. I again reflected
on my past life, and accused myself of want
of firmness in my resolutions. I thought God had
now afflicted me in order to make me hate sin,
and love righteousness; and that were I again restored
to health, and free from pain, nothing in this
world would be able to make me leave my duty:
and I flattered myself that what I had now suffered
had destroyed the love of sin in my heart. Under
this persuasion, being in agony through the severity
of pain, I exclaimed, "Lord, let it suffice thee,
for it is enough; take but thine hand from me
this once!" Although this was not a prayer becoming
a sinner ready to perish, which ought to
have been a supplication for mercy for the sake of
// File: 164.png
Christ; yet God was pleased in his compassion to
grant me the thing I sought. He did remove his
hand, and spare my life; the mortification, after
having raged about three weeks, subsided; the
putrid flesh began to fall away; the burning pain
left the wound; and in about ten days it was clean;
but the mortification had detached, and wholly
destroyed, the greater part of the tendon of the
heel. I now looked upon myself as one that had
been rescued from the grave, and the occurrences
that took place immediately, tended still more
strongly to impress this upon my mind. The
wound of my comrade, who had been serviceable
to me when I was so ill, as I began to mend, grew
worse, inflamed, and in a few days, nearly the
whole of the calf of his leg was one putrid mass.
A blood-vessel burst in it during the night; but he
was in such pain, that he was not sensible of the
bleeding, which continued until day break; when
the floor under and around his bed was covered
with blood. The surgeon was sent for, to whom
he said, "I believe Sir, I have been bleeding to
death in the night time, and was not sensible of
it." The bleeding had now ceased, but he was
so weak that he was unable to speak; and he died
in a few hours, and was carried out and buried.
The Saviour's words, "One shall be taken and
the other left," struck me forcibly in these circumstances:
when my comrade, who was so
shortly before in a fairer way of recovery than I
was, was thus cut off, and I was left as a monument
of God's sparing mercy.
His bed was not long empty. In a few days
// File: 165.png
an Irish grenadier was brought to it, whose case
was truly hopeless. He had had a boil on the
lower part of the breast, which had mortified; the
mortification had spread over the breast, and had
eaten a hole larger than a dollar into the chest, so that
when the dressing was off, the inside of the chest
was visible. He lived in great agony for about six
days, and died; by which time the hole into the
chest was much larger.--In a few days after, the
same bed was filled by an artilleryman, a townsman
of my own, who had got the calf of one of his
legs accidentally bruised. The leg inflamed; amputation
was resorted to; but, with all the attention
the surgeons paid to him, he also died in a very
short time. My wound continued to mend; and
as soon as I was able to move, I got a crutch and
a staff, and a strap to support my leg, and got out
of bed for a part of the day, after having been confined
to it nearly six months.
This was about the middle of September, before
the Nile had attained the height of its inundation.
I passed a part of the day, sitting in one
of the front windows which looked to the Nile,
and remarked its daily progress. As I grew
stronger, I got upon the roof of the building, which
was flat, and had a view of the town and the surrounding
country. In the country, on the opposite
side of the Nile, nothing was to be seen, as
far as the eye could reach, but water, with the
trees standing in it. I travelled about too, visiting
my acquaintances in the hospital who belonged to
the same regiment with myself.
Some of the Arab watermen were employed to
supply the hospital with water. They brought it
// File: 166.png
from the Nile[#] upon their backs, in the skins of
goats slung across their shoulders. The skin had
been sewed up after being taken off the animal,
and was in its natural shape; the neck part being
left open for filling and emptying. (This was
simply twisted and held together with the hand,
when the skin was to be immediately emptied;
but it might be tied, when it was to be kept full,
or carried to a distance.) All kinds of liquids,
even wine and honey are kept in these skins.--This
illustrates the parable of the new wine and
old bottles, Luke v. 37, 38. The bottles were
skins: and, as wine is a fermented liquor, the skin
bottles, once used, would be so much impregnated
with the wine that had been in them, that if new
wine were put into them, it would cause it to ferment
anew; and this would burst them. The
original inmates of the hospital were now greatly
reduced; a number having recovered, and a great
many having died: but it was not allowed in any
part to remain empty. Grand Cairo having surrendered
to the British and Turkish forces on the
24th June, the sick of our own army were sent
down the Nile; and they filled up all the vacancies.
Cases of dysentery, and sore eyes, were so
numerous, that a number of buildings were fitted
up in Rosetta for their reception. Many died of
the dysentery; but those afflicted with sore eyes
// File: 167.png
were most numerous, and much to be pitied.--Their
torment was excessive: the pain in their
eyes was as if they had been filled with burning
sand, they had no respite from acute sufferings;
and many lost their sight in spite of all the
power of medicine. About the end of August, my
own eyes became dreadfully inflamed in one night.
The surgeon applied a very large blister in the
morning, and by next day the inflammation was
greatly subsided, but I did not get wholly free of
it until I left Egypt, and was several days at sea
on the way to Malta. The Egyptian ophthalmia
was one of the most dreadful calamities that ever
befel the British army.
The French that were in Cairo, amounting to
13000, were embarked and sent to France in the
month of August.
As my leg continued to mend, I felt grateful to
God for his great mercy to me; but it was not long,
until I had to accuse myself of having failed in duty,
and come short of my promise; and this threw
me into dejection of mind; which however wore
gradually off. As I had much leisure time, I read
more of my Bible than formerly; but the historical
parts attracted my attention more than the doctrinal.
Happening to read through the beginning
of Exodus, I was struck when I found, that I had
made use of the same words that Pharaoh used to
Moses, chap. ix. ver. 28, and which he afterwards
repeated, chap. x. ver. 17. This made me fear,
lest I should prove like Pharaoh; and in place of
being softened by mercies, and bound by gratitude,
become hardened by them and perish in the end.
I then recollected, that I had heard Dr. Balfour
// File: 168.png
preach, from Hebrews iii. 12, 13, I remembered
the words, "lest any of you be hardened through
the deceitfulness of sin," and I turned to the passage
and read it. It led me to ponder on the deceitful
nature, and dangerous tendency of sin;
which increased my fear that I might become
hardened, and made my mind very uneasy. I
would sometimes think on the instructions I had
got, and the tasks I had learned at the Sabbath
school; which I had now almost forgotten: I remembered
some little of the seventeenth chapter of
John, for the learning of which, myself and others
had received a penny. This led me to read it, and
the fifty-third of Isaiah, which also I had learned;
but I did not understand its import, although familiar
with the words. I then turned over all the
parallel passages, that I had read, in proof of doctrines
in the school; and although I did not understand
those that treated of the way of a sinner's
acceptance with God, by faith in the righteousness
and atonement of the great Redeemer, yet it helped
to keep the words of Scripture relative to these
doctrines on my memory, which was of use to me
afterwards. But the doctrines of heaven, and hell,
the resurrection, and eternal judgment, are more
readily apprehended: and these made increasingly
strong impressions on my mind.
I was now pretty certain that I was unfit for military
service; and from Egypt, the land of bondage,
I cast a longing eye to my native home, and
wished myself there, that I might enjoy the benefits
of a Sabbath, the instructions of religious
teachers, and freedom from the society of the
// File: 169.png
wicked. All my hopes now centered in this, and
had I despaired of it, I would have given myself
over for lost.
After the French were embarked who had surrendered
at Cairo, our troops which had been
there, rejoined the army that was blockading Alexandria.
Several regiments had lately come from
England, so that it was now pretty strong. Alexandria
was immediately besieged in form, and the
operations pushed so vigorously, that the garrison
was compelled to surrender on the 1st September,
on condition of retaining their private property and
being sent to France. Their number was about
eleven thousand, of all descriptions. This event
terminated hostilities in Egypt, and our troops prepared
to leave it as soon as possible. Rosetta was
occupied during the siege by a division of British,
and Sepoys, natives of India, under the command
of Sir David Baird, who had come from the East
Indies to our assistance, with about seven thousand
men. They had sailed up the Red sea, and
marched through the desert, and arrived at Cairo
shortly after it had surrendered. The Sepoys,
when off duty, laid aside their uniforms, and
walked about in the burning sun with nothing on
the body but a pair of very short white drawers.
The dress of men and women of the common
people of Egypt, consists of a blue cotton gown
resembling a woman's shift: some have an upper
and under garment. The men wear a sash or
girdle round the middle; a turban and slippers;
but no stockings. The women have no girdle
round the middle; they wear vails; of which those
// File: 170.png
that I saw were of coarse net-work, resembling
the texture of a serjeant's sash, and shaped like the
little bag nets used for catching trout in small
rivers. The mouth of them is put under the chin
and over the forehead, and is fastened behind:
there are two holes opposite to the eyes, and the
tapering end hangs down the breast. They appear
to think, that modesty lies in concealing from
public view the lower part of the face, whilst they
are very negligent in other respects, which are
more essential to that virtue. To Europeans the
appearance of their faces, and particularly the part
that is usually concealed, is no way interesting.--Their
complexion is dark; their eyes, in general,
are inflamed; and their cheeks and chins are
marked with the figures of half moons, stars, &c.
in the way that our sailors mark themselves.
In some of the towns, girls, 14 years old, were
seen going to the river for water, in a state of
complete nudity; and males of all ages were seen
mixed together in groupes, in the same state,
without any sense of shame. They anoint their
bodies with olive oil, which prevents the sun from
blistering the skin. There are no stools or chairs
for sitting upon in Egypt; their common way of
sitting is upon the hams of their legs, in which
posture they will remain for hours, apparently as
much at their ease as a European upon a chair;
they eat their meals in a reclining posture, but
make no use of knives, forks or spoons; when they
sup they literally "dip their hand in the dish,"[#]
// File: 171.png
and feed themselves with their fingers in place of
spoons. The above customs were practised in
the time of Christ, and still exists through the east.
There are numbers of mosques, or Mahomedan
churches, in the towns. They have, in general, a
particular kind of spires, called minarets, some of
which are very lofty: they are in shape at the top
like an onion, but have no weathercocks, nor clocks,
nor bells; of which latter, the Mahomedan religion
prohibits the use. The minarets have all one or
more balustrades round them, into which a man
ascends at the end of every watch, and walks
round, calling the people to prayers with as loud a
voice as he possibly can. In Egypt it is commonly
a blind man who performs this office.
The uninterrupted sunshine at Cairo, afforded
the French the means of partly supplying the want
of clocks and bells, by ascertaining exactly when
it was twelve o'clock. They mounted one of the
guns in the citadel upon a peculiar construction,
and put some fine brass work at the breech, in
which was a burning glass just over the touch
hole; by which the rays of the sun, the instant he
reached the meridian, kindled the powder and fired
the gun. This is a proof that clouds and rain
are seldom seen at Cairo; otherwise the firing of
the gun could not have been depended on. When
the French left the citadel, the Turks got possession
of it; and some of them broke and stole the
brass work of this gun, supposing the polished metal
to be gold.
The heat of the country was very oppressive;
and the army that went to Cairo suffered much
// File: 172.png
from it during their march. The perspiration
came through their clothes, and wetted their buff
belts opposite the back, just as if they had been
soaked in water.
About this time a very melancholy accident
happened to some men of the 13th regiment of
foot. Their regimental store house was in a building
a few yards from the hospital; some of them
were employed sorting cartridges in a room on the
first floor, when one of them came in smoking tobacco,
and thoughtlessly held his head over an
open chest into which they were packing the cartridges;
a spark fell from the pipe, and the powder
exploded and gave a violent shock to the hospital
and adjacent buildings; several men, and a
serjeant's wife, were killed in the house, and I
think nine or ten more were much bruised and
dreadfully burned, and were brought into the hospital;
their condition was more pitiful than that
of those who were severely wounded, because so
much of the skin of the face and body had been
burned, that they had not sound skin left to lie
upon; five or six of them lingered about a week in
great agony, and died. I think that twelve or
sixteen were killed or severely injured by this accident.
Some who were sitting in the bottom of
an open window, with their legs over the wall,
were blown down into the street, but were not
much hurt.
Towards the end of September, my wound was
nearly whole, but my leg was very much contracted.
I was ordered to prepare to join my regiment
at Alexandria to go home with it. But before
// File: 173.png
taking a final leave of the hospitals, I would
make a few further remarks upon the manner in
which I saw my fellow creatures depart this life.
And it must be confessed, that to all appearance
many of them died hardy; they might groan through
extremity of bodily pain, but did not exhibit any
anguish of mind at the fear of death or judgment;
but I could not discern any rational ground for this
apparent want of anxiety about futurity. To
make a merit of meeting death bravely, when it
can not be avoided, is but a poor reason for a rational,
immortal, and accountable creature, to act
upon. If man is a sinner, and must render an
account to his Maker when he dies, surely to manifest
no concern about the issue of death, is not to
act the part worthy of a rational creature. To
shut out all concern about eternity, in order to act
the hero at the last, is liker the conduct of a blind
madman than a true hero; for true courage in the
hour of death can only be founded on the knowledge
of our being happier hereafter; and this persuasion
is only to be attained, by the reception of
the good news of salvation by Jesus Christ, revealed
in the Scriptures. Infidelity has said much
against the superstition of the Bible; but while it
does this, it gives an accountable creature nothing
in the room of it upon which to found a reasonable
hope for eternity. Infidels have often said that
the fears of hell which make men afraid to die,
are the produce of superstition. Were there none
of those whom I saw die, who had freed themselves
of the fears produced by the Bible account of a future
state? It is likely that some of them had; for
// File: 174.png
their previous habits and behaviour were as opposite
to the Scriptures, as if they had never heard
of such a book; and it was as little talked of, as
if it had never existed. If infidelity be true, the
death of its disciples ought to be more dignified
and composed than that of any others: their future
prospects ought to be the most certain, intelligent,
and cheering to the immortal soul, when it is about
to take its flight into the world of spirits and return
to God who gave it. A dying infidel, if his
system be truth, should be one that should rejoice
in death, that he had freed himself from the fears
produced by the Bible; he ought to be able to direct
those around his dying bed to the truth that
supports his mind, and show, at the same time,
that he has a proper discernment of his own condition
as an accountable creature, and suitable
conceptions of the moral character of his Maker
and Judge. But of all that I ever saw die, I never
heard any rejoicing in the assertions of infidelity:
I saw many die apparently hardy; but their
deaths resembled more that of the beasts that perish,
than of accountable immortal creatures. I
have since seen Christians die, but the manner of
their death was very different: their conceptions of
the majesty and holy purity of God were exalted;
their sense of the evil of their own sins, and the
moral responsibility of their conduct, was deep;
but with all this full in their view, they had good
hope through trusting in Christ; and I never yet
saw or heard of a dying Christian who regretted
that he had trusted too much to Christ, or thought
too highly of him; but the contrary. I have often
// File: 175.png
heard them regret deeply that they had thought too
lowly of him, and of what he had done to save
sinners, and had trusted too little to him, and depended
too little on the promises of the Bible; and
I have heard them pray earnestly for forgiveness for
this, as being the most heinous of all their sins.--Reader,
if ever your mind has been stumbled by
the arguments of infidelity, try it by this test,--what
provision does it make for eternity, to a sinful
and accountable creature; and you will find
that in this most important of all other concerns it
makes no provision whatever: it is revelation
alone that either does or can make any provision
for a certain ground of hope for futurity. God
alone can tell how he will forgive sin: he has
done this in the Scriptures, and there alone. O
be sure you examine what is revealed in them upon
this subject, and build your hope for eternity
only upon what God has revealed to a sinner to
trust in, that you may not die in despair, nor be
deluded by a false hope, and finally be disappointed:
and for this purpose, I earnestly entreat
your serious consideration of what is said towards
the conclusion of this narrative.
Before leaving the hospital, I feel bound in gratitude
to acknowledge the care and attention that
was paid to the sick and wounded: all things considered,
every thing was done for them that could
be done, and much expense was incurred for
medicines, attendance, and accommodation, and
every exertion made to procure suitable provisions.
When I think upon it to this day, I feel grateful
for the care that was taken of the helpless, and
// File: 176.png
those who were rendered unfit to serve their country
any longer: by this means many were preserved
to their families and their friends, who
otherwise would never have returned.
On the 29th September, I embarked in a Germ
on the Nile, which dropped down the river, and
lay near the entrance, to be ready to pass the bar
early in the morning, that being the most favourable
time; for the wind rises at sun rise, and
blows from the sea up the river during the day,
with a steady, and sometimes strong breeze, and
dies away in the evening. Vessels going up the
Nile carry a press of sail, and go at a great rate
during the day, and stop at night: vessels going
down the river lower their sails and yards, lay
their broadside to the stream, and drift along with
it. On the morning of the 30th, the wind and
surf were so high, that it was unsafe to attempt
passing the bar; so that we returned to Rosetta
and lay it the quay three days, waiting for moderate
weather. The Nile was still considerably
above its banks: the extensive fields of rice, and
corn, particularly on the east side, excited my admiration.
The seed had been sown previously
to the inundation, and had taken root and grown
up with the rise of the water; which made it to
have a compact and level surface, resembling that
of a bowling-green, for many miles. This crop
would be ripe, by the time the inundation would
fall within the banks of the river; and another crop
of wheat or barley, and one of clover or vegetables,
would be produced before the return of the inundation
next year.--Water is raised by buffaloes and
// File: 177.png
oxen from the river, into the canals;[#] the beds of
which are above the level of the country. It is
let out into the fields during the growth of the
other two crops; and when the last one is reaped,
this labour is suspended. Then the heat of the
sun soon dries the ground, and rends it into numerous
and deep fissures; some of them are from
ten to twenty feet deep. The army experienced
considerable difficulty from this cause, on its
// File: 178.png
march back from Cairo; particularly at night,
when both men and horses were in danger of having
their legs broke by falling into them.
While I lay at the quay, I was astonished at the
great number of boats discharging cargoes of grain,
which was piled in huge heaps in the open air,
not far from the brink of the river;[#] a sight which
reminded one of the words of Jacob, "I have
heard that there is corn in Egypt." But, with all
this plenty, it is a miserable place. The common
people enjoy little of its abundance; their condition
is the most wretched I ever saw or heard of among
civilized nations. The houses of the peasantry
are mere hovels, little if any thing better than the
Kraals of the wild Hottentots.[#] The inhabitants
// File: 179.png
of the land of Egypt, which was the house of
bondage to the children of Israel, now suffer
bondage in their own land, little, if at all, interior
to that which their ancestors made the Israelites
suffer. The government has for a long time been
in the hands of Turks or Mamelukes, who are
always foreigners, and who rule with rigour; and
the inhabitants never take any interest in the
affairs of the government, but are entirely passive
to every change that takes place. The country
abounds with Arabs. The Copts, its original inhabitants,
are the fewest in number; they profess
Christianity, and are the more liable, on that account,
to be oppressed by their Mahomedan masters.
The prediction is now fully verified, that
Egypt, once the first of nations, should become the
basest of kingdoms: Ezek. xxix. 15, 16. It is
sunk so low in ignorance and wretchedness, that,
if it were not for the many elegant and stupendous
remains of antiquity existing in the country, the
voice of history, strong as it is, could scarcely be
credited, that it was once the first of nations, and
the seat of the arts and sciences. It is a land of
pestilence and disease. "In Cairo, last year, forty
thousand were supposed to be infected with the
plague: and many of the French garrison died
in that city, although the disease was treated in
// File: 180.png
their hospitals with the greatest ability. In
Upper Egypt sixty thousand perished during the
same season,"[#] besides those who died of it in
other parts of the country. Among the British, the
plague was confined to the "hospital and troops
stationary at Aboukir, where it broke out on the
12th April, and terminated on the 26th August.
Three hundred and eighty, in the course of that
time, were affected with it; one hundred and
seventy-three died, and two hundred and seven
recovered. The deaths chiefly fell on the orderlies,
nurses, and other servants of the hospitals."[#]
"The plague raged again at Rosetta towards the
fall of the year and numbers of the Sepoys died
of it."[#] When a person is infected with the
pestilence, after the manner of Egypt, (Amos iv.
10,) the disease is indicated by two boils which
are commonly in the groin. In addition to the
plague, "Leprosy of the worst species, and Elephantiasis,
which swells the legs larger than a
common bolster," and a number of other diseases
are very general. "The number of blind is
prodigious, nearly every fifth inhabitant has lost
one eye, and many both. All the children have
sore eyes, and Europeans do not escape better.
The French at first had more than two thirds of
their army affected with this malady; and the
English, during their short stay, had one hundred
and sixty totally blind, and two hundred that
lost one eye irrecoverably."[#] How many more
were affected with this dreadful malady among
// File: 181.png
the troops that remained in the country until the
following year, when it was wholly evacuated, I
can not tell; but have reason to believe the number
was considerable. Children must suffer much
during their infancy from the flies, because they
are unable to drive them from their eyes. I saw
a woman going to the Nile for water, which she
carried in a pitcher upon her head: a naked child
sat across her shoulders; its little hands were employed
in holding by the head of its mother, to
prevent itself from falling; its eye-lashes were
literally black with flies that were sucking at its
eyes, as they would do at sugar. They work
themselves into the inner coating of the eyelids of
infants, which no doubt causes some of them to
lose their sight in their tender years. In addition
to flies, gnats and mosquitoes, all other kinds of
vermin are incredibly numerous and troublesome;
so much so, that, although there were nothing else
but them, they would make Egypt an uncomfortable
country to live in. Although the French used
all the freedom of conquerors, they were perfectly
sick of it. When we landed, they supposed, that,
after we had expelled them, we intended to retain
possession of it; and they sincerely pitied the lot
of their supposed successors. They fought, indeed,
bravely; but it was not out of love to the country,
but in subordination to military discipline, and for
the honour of their arms; but when compelled to
surrender on condition of being sent home to
France, they rejoiced in the event as a happy deliverance.
And indeed it was no wonder; for, in
addition to the disagreeable nature of the climate,
// File: 182.png
many of the military posts where they did duty,
being in lonely sandy deserts, were so ill accommodated,
and in all respects so uncomfortable, that
to do service at them was fitter for being a punishment
to men banished for their crimes, than for
those who deserved well of their country.
Dr. Clarke sailed up the Nile on the 10th of
August, 1801, when the river was beginning to
overflow the country. The following extract corroborates
all that I had heard related by my comrades,
after they had returned from Cairo, and is
so interesting, that it will gratify such readers as
have not access to his work. After passing Rachmanie,
he says, "Villages in an almost uninterrupted
succession, denoted a much greater population
than we had imagined this country to
contain. Upon each side of the river, as far as
the eye could reach, we saw fields of corn and
rice, with such beautiful groves, seeming to rise
out of the watery plains, and to shade innumerable
settlements in the Delta, amidst never-ending
plantations of melons, and all kinds of
garden vegetables, that, from the abundance of
its harvests, Egypt might be deemed the richest
country in the world. Such is the picture exhibited
to the native inhabitants, who are seasoned
to withstand the disorders of the country,
and can bear with indifference the attacks of
myriads of all sorts of noxious animals; to whom
mud and mosquitoes, or dust and vermin, are
alike indifferent; who, having never experienced
one comfortable feeling in the midst of their
highest enjoyments, nor a single antidote to sorrow
// File: 183.png
in the depths of their wretchedness, vegetate,
like the bananas and sycamores around
them. But strangers, and especially the inhabitants
of Northern countries, where wholesome
air and cleanliness are among the necessaries
of life, must consider Egypt as the most
detestable region upon earth. Upon the retiring
of the Nile, the country is one vast swamp.
The atmosphere is impregnated with every
putrid and offensive exhalation, then stagnates,
like the filthy pools over which it broods. Then,
too, the plague regularly begins; nor ceases, until
the waters return again."[#] Throughout the
spring, intermitting fevers universally prevail.
About the beginning of May, certain winds cover
even the sands of the desert with the most disgusting
vermin.[#] The latest descendants of
// File: 184.png
Pharaoh are not yet delivered from the evils
which fell upon the land, when it was smitten
by the hands of Moses and Aaron; the 'plague
of frogs,' the 'plague of lice,' the 'plague of
flies,' the 'murrain, boils, and blains,' prevail
so, that the whole country is 'corrupted,' and
'the dust of the earth becomes lice, upon man and
upon beast, throughout the land of Egypt.' This
application of the words of sacred Scripture
affords a literal statement of existing evils, such
an one as the statistics of the country do now
warrant. In its justification, an appeal may be
made to the testimony of all those who have resided
in the country during the very opposite
seasons of its prosperity and privation; during
the inundation, and when the flood has retired,
or before it takes place, in the beginning of the
year. At the period of the overflow, persons
who drink the water become subject to a disorder
called 'prickly heat:' this often terminates
in those dreadful wounds alluded to in the sacred
writings, by the words 'boils and blains.' During
the months of June, July, and August, many individuals
are deprived of sight, owing to a disorder
of the eyes peculiar to this country. Europeans,
having no other name for it, have called
it ophthalmia, from the organs it affects. There
was hardly an individual who did not suffer,
more or less, the consequences of this painful
malady. At this season, also, the dysentery begins
// File: 185.png
to number its victims; and although some
be fortunate enough to escape the worst effects
of this disorder, it proves fatal in many instances."[#]
Dr. Clarke's account of what he experienced at
Cairo, in the middle of August, is also interesting:
"The mercury in Fahrenheit's thermometer seemed
at this time fixed. It remained at 90 degrees for
several days, without the smallest perceptible
change. Almost every European suffered from
inflammation of the eyes. Many were troubled
with cutaneous disorders. The prickly heat
was very common. This was attributed to
drinking the muddy water of the Nile, the inhabitants
having no other. Their mode of
purifying it, in a certain degree, is by rubbing
the inside of the water vessel with bruised
almonds: this precipitates a portion of the mud,
but it is never quite clear. Many persons were
afflicted with sores upon the skin, which were
called 'biles of the Nile;' and dysenterical complaints
were universal. A singular species of
lizard made its appearance in every chamber,
having circular membranes at the extremity of
its feet, which gave it such tenacity, that it
walked upon window-panes of glass, or upon
the surfaces of pendent mirrors.[#] This revolting
sight was common to every apartment, whether
// File: 186.png
in the houses of the rich or of the poor. At the
same time, such a plague of flies covered all
things with their swarms, that it was impossible
to eat without hiring persons to stand by every
table with feathers, or flappers, to drive them
away. Liquor could not be poured into a glass;
the mode of drinking was by keeping the mouth
of every bottle covered until the moment it was
applied to the lips: and instantly covering it
with the palm of the hand, when removing it to
offer to any one else. The utmost attention to
cleanliness, by a frequent change of every article
of wearing apparel, could not repel the attacks
of vermin which seemed to infest even
the air of the place. A gentleman made his
appearance before a party he had invited to
dinner, with lice swarming upon his clothes.
The only explanation he could give as to the
cause, was, that he had sat for a short time in
one of the boats upon the canal. Perhaps objection
may be made to a statement even of
facts, which refers to no pleasing theme; but
the author does not conceive it possible to give
Englishmen a correct notion of the trials to
which they will be exposed in visiting this country,
without calling some things by their proper
names."[#]
Before losing sight of the contest that was in
Egypt, it may not be amiss to glance at the unavoidable
evils of war. With the inhabitants we
had no quarrel: our sole object was to expel the
// File: 187.png
French. But this could not be done, without the
peaceful inhabitants receiving, in many cases,
serious injury. The roads from town to town did
not suit the march of the army to and from Cairo;
the troops generally took the direct road through
the corn-fields, and their encampments were sometimes
in fields of corn, tobacco, poppies, sego,
melons, indigo, &c. the produce of which, however
valuable, was destroyed. Fuel was scarce;
and the soldiers were necessitated to use whatever
would burn. Stalks of tobacco, bean straw,
and such like substances, were used to boil the
kettles;[#] and in places where dry straw was difficult
to be had, it was necessary to place guards at
the entrances to the neighbouring villages or towns,
to prevent the soldiers from unroofing the houses
for wood to make fuel: and with all the attention
of the officers, such was the necessity of the case,
that injury could not always be prevented.
The discipline of the army was strict, and the
general behaviour of the troops good; but many
instances of petty depredations and pilfering took
place, that were not known, and could not be prevented.
Many instances occurred of inhabitants,
particularly Arabs, who sold bread, fruit, eggs, &c.
having their articles taken from them by "fellows
of the baser sort," without any payment, and
sometimes with abuse into the bargain. The
Arabs when so used would throw dust upon their
heads, and call upon God, and the Prophet, and
// File: 188.png
the Sultan. But as this usage was not general,
and as the army spent a considerable sum of good
money among them,[#] they were not deterred from
following it with whatever they had to sell, and I
believe many of them made more money at that
time, than ever they had an opportunity of doing
before or since. On the afternoon of the 2d October,
we again left Rosetta, and lay for the night
near the mouth of the river. The wind was
moderate next morning; we passed the bar safely:
had a pleasant voyage across the bay of Aboukir,
and through Like Maadie; passed through the cut
in the banks of the canal of Alexandria into Lake
Mareotis,[#] and landed not far from the place
// File: 189.png
where the battle of the 21st of March was fought,
of which I had thus another view, and which I
never can forget. I joined the regiment on the
heights of Alexandria; we embarked next day at
Aboukir, on board of two frigates; sailed on the
morning of the 7th October; and lost sight of the
celebrated land of Egypt by 12 o'clock. None
regretted this. We indeed regretted our countrymen
and comrades, who had found a grave there;
but the country itself had no charms to make us
regret leaving it. All our thoughts were now fixed
upon home; and we rejoiced to think, that every
day was bringing us nearer it.
.fn #
During the time of the inundation, the water in the
river is very thick but as much pure water as served us
for drinking, was procured from some private wells in the
town, which I suppose had a communication with the river,
which had the effect of filtering the water.
.fn-
.fn #
Matthew xxvi. 23.
.fn-
.fn #
I saw the buffaloes at this employment, when I sailed
up the river, on the 24th June, when coming to Rosetta.
The buffalo is much larger than the ox; his bones are uncommonly
large, even in comparison to the size of his body,
which is very lean; his strength must be much greater than
that of the ox. When he walks, he carries his head like
the camel, his nose being nearly as high as his horns, and
is on the whole a very dull looking animal; but, notwithstanding,
he is capable of being trained to this work, as
well, if not better, than the ox, for I saw them keeping a
slow but steady pace at their work, without the immediate
presence of a driver. The water is raised by a wheel,
upon which buckets or earthen pitchers are fastened.
Since the publication of the first edition, I have seen the
5th vol. of Dr. Clarke's Travels in Egypt; and as his knowledge
is more extensive than mine, I take the liberty of
inserting an extract, upon the produce and manner of cultivating
the Delta. Speaking of the method of watering
the ground, he says, "The land thus watered, produces
three crops in each year; the first of clover, the second of
corn, and the third of rice. The rice grounds are inundated,
from the time of sowing nearly to harvest. The
seed is commonly cast upon the water, a practice twice
alluded to in sacred Scripture. Balaam prophesied of
Israel, Numb. xxiv. 7, that 'his seed should be in many
waters.' In the directions given for charity, by the son of
David, it is written, Eccles. xi. 1. 'Cast thy bread (i. e.
bread corn) upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after
many days.' When the rice plants are about two feet
high they are transplanted."--Vol. v. pp. 47, 48.
.fn-
.fn #
The grain was measured by an Arab into baskets,
which were carried to the heap by others, upon their
shoulders. The measurer accompanied his work with a
song indicative of the quantity he put into each basket.
The owner stood upon the quay and received a bean or
pea from the carriers as they passed by him to the heap;
and this was the method by which he kept an account of
the quantity landed.
.fn-
.fn #
I saw the exterior of some of these houses on the banks
of the Nile, but never had an opportunity of seeing their
interior. Sir R. Wilson says, in vol. i. pp. 156, 157, "All
language is insufficient to give a just idea of the misery of
an Egyptian village; but those who have been in Ireland,
may best suppose the degree, when an Irish hut is described
as a palace, in comparison to an Arab's stye; for it
can be called by no other name. Each habitation is built of
mud, even the roof, and resembles in shape an oven: within
is only one apartment, generally of about ten feet square.
The door does not admit of a man's entering upright; but,
as the bottom is dug out about two feet, when in the room
an erect posture is possible. A mat, some large vessels to
hold water, which is the constant occupation of the women
to fetch; a pitcher made of fine porous clay, found best in
Upper Egypt, near Cunei, and in which the water is kept
very cool; a rice pan and coffee pot, are all the ornaments
and utensils. Here, then, a whole family eat and sleep
without any consideration of decency or cleanliness; being,
in regard to the latter, worse even than the beasts of the
field, which naturally respect their own tenements."
.fn-
.fn #
Sir R. Wilson's History, vol. ii. p. 116.
.fn-
.fn #
Ibid. pp. 115, 132.
.fn-
.fn #
Ibid. p. 119.
.fn-
.fn #
Ibid. p. 121.
.fn-
.fn #
"General Le Grange assured us, when on board the
Braakel, that the ravages in the French army, caused by
the plague, during the month of April, at one time,
amounted to an hundred men in a single day."
.fn-
.fn #
"Sir Sidney Smith informed the author (Dr. Clarke)
that one night, preferring a bed upon the sand of the
desert to a night's lodging in the village of Etko, as
thinking he should be more secure from vermin, he
found himself, in the morning, entirely covered by them.
Lice and scorpions abound in all the sandy desert near
Alexandria." One of my comrades informed me, that
when some of the date trees were split at Aboukir, for
making the hospital, there were so many lice in the hearts
of them that they might have been gathered in handfuls.
The frogs also were so abundant at some of the places
where the army halted between Rosetta and Cairo, that it
was not possible to get at the water in the river without
treading upon them; and at one place the camp ground
was literally covered with black beetles, to the no small
annoyance of the soldiers in the tents, and the bed frames
and mats that we got new in the hospital in Rosetta in
the end of June, were so full of bugs by the end of September,
that they were fit only to be burnt.
.fn-
.fn #
Clarke's Travels, vol. v. pp. 56, 59.
.fn-
.fn #
"A similar membrane terminates each foot of a common
fly: beneath which a vacuum takes place, and the
animal maintains a footing upon ceilings, owing to the
pressure of the external air upon this membrane."
.fn-
.fn #
Clarke's Travels, vol. v. pp. 78, 80.
.fn-
.fn #
When their rations happened to be salt pork, they
used to put a piece of it under the kettle to burn with the
straw.
.fn-
.fn #
With the exception of gold, which was in the hands
of a few, the coin circulating in Egypt was made of base
metal, watered over with silver; and was of little or no intrinsic
value. There were large pieces of this kind, some
of them larger than a crown, which were of different
values: but a small coin, called a para, about the breadth
of a farthing, and no thicker than the scale of a fish, was
the most common; of which 120, and in some places 160,
were given for a Spanish dollar. The money expended
by the army was gold and Spanish dollars.
.fn-
.fn #
The inundation in this lake extended farther than the
eye could reach. The banks of the canal formed a road
for communicating with the interior of the country; a
bridge of boats united the banks, one of the boats being
moveable, for the purpose of allowing vessels to pass in
and out of Lake Mareotis. Before the army wholly left
the country, the boats forming the bridge were sunk in
the cut, and served for a foundation upon which the banks
were rebuilt. When the British took Alexandria, in March,
1807, a detachment was sent to take Rosetta; but they
were repulsed by those Turks who had accompanied the
army on its march to and from Cairo, and who had acquired
a considerable portion of British discipline. The rays
of the sun had by this time so far dried up the salt water
in Lake Mareotis as to render it passable; but the British
again cut the banks of the canal, and admitted the sea into
it, to protect Alexandria from being attacked by the
Turks.
.fn-
.sp 4
.h2 id=chap7
CHAPTER VII.
.sp 2
After a pleasant passage, having light winds and
fine weather, we arrived at Malta on the 23d October.
Here our joy was wonderfully heightened
by the news of peace. The news had come from
France, but they were credit worthy. The only
cause of regret was, that such an important and
strongly fortified place as Malta, where we now
lay, was to be given up. We did not leave Malta
until the 26th November, at which delay the soldiers
were vexed; but the naval officers were no
way anxious to get home, because they knew that
// File: 190.png
the ship would be paid off, and they would then
lose their situations. Our own officers were apprehensive
that the regiment might be reduced,
which would put them on half pay; but the men
rejoiced in the prospect.[#] We had a tedious passage
down the Mediterranean, and did not arrive
at Gibraltar until the 20d December. We left
it on the 1st January, 1802, and arrived at the
Cove of Cork on the 23d, having had rough
weather all the way, which on two occasions increased
to a tempest, and did the ship I was in
considerable damage. We had to ride quarantine
until the 9th February. My leg had stretched
considerably during the passage, and I walked
about the deck with the help of a stick. The
regiment landed, and marched into Cork on the
12th, the wounded and baggage being conveyed
by water. And here I found that, although I could
safely walk about with a stick on the level deck
of a ship, my leg was not sufficiently strong to
travel the necessary distances on land. My wound
here broke out again; and when the regiment left
Cork for Kilkenny, although I rode upon the baggage,
yet the travelling from the places where the
baggage halted to my billet, which was sometimes
more than a mile, was injurious to me. We came
to Kilkenny on the 21st, and lay in it about six
weeks. The regiment was inspected by the
General and Surgeon of the district, and a great
number ordered to be discharged, of which I was
one.
// File: 191.png
My conduct in Kilkenny was not what it ought
to have been; not that I fell into open gross sin,
but I did not improve my mercies as I ought, and
was guilty of what I disallowed in my own conscience,
and felt my weakness and inability to
overcome the inward workings of corruption. I
here bought Young's Night Thoughts, that by
reading it, I might fortify my mind against temptation.
I placed great confidence in the power of
the poet's language; but it had not the effect I
wished and expected. I was one evening at the
Methodist chapel; but I did not pay that attention
to the Sabbath which I might have done. The
regiment left Kilkenny, and marched for Belfast;
and when we came to Dublin, the discharged men
that were recommended to the benefit of Chelsea
Hospital, embarked for Liverpool, from which we
proceeded to London; where I was examined and
admitted an out-pensioner of Chelsea Hospital, on
the 27th May, 1802. I left London on the 29th,
and took a passage in one of the Carron Company's
brigs; landed at Queensferry on the 12th
of June, and arrived in Glasgow next day, happy
to find myself restored to my friends.--My wound
was still open; I might have gone into York Hospital
in London, and been cured, previously to
being discharged; and had I been wise, I should
have done this: but I was so anxious to be home,
that I did not do it, for fear it might delay me
some time.
My military life being now terminated, I desire
to bless God, with a grateful heart, for his goodness
and care over me while in the army, in a
// File: 192.png
particular not before referred to. For during the
six years that I was a soldier, I was never confuted
for any fault. My conduct was, in general, good,
in a military point of view; but there were times
that I was guilty of faults, for which I might have
been punished, and which I have reason to thank
God for escaping. And what is a little singular,
I was never concerned in any court martial case,
nor so much as a witness against any man; on the
whole, I passed comparatively easy and quietly
through the army, and without doubt, the remaining
restraints of early and religious instruction was
one particular mean of preserving me from many
evils and dangers; and in this respect proved an
invaluable blessing to me, while I was a soldier.
I mention this particular to show what good early
religious instruction may do, although it may not
have the effect of converting the soul.
I had now attained my wishes, by being safely
settled at home. God had given me the desire of
my heart. If I did not now find ability to keep
the commandments of God, in the way that I proposed
to myself, and upon which I founded my
hope of meriting and enjoying his favour, I could
not expect to find any situation more favourable.
I called to mind all the promises I had made, and
reflected on all the deliverances God had graciously
given me, and the gratitude that was due to him
for them. Circumstances led me to attend Mr.
Ewing's ministry at the Tabernacle; but, although
I attended divine ordinances, and read religious
books, I was not a whit the better. I had also
considerable opportunity of being alone; but where
// File: 193.png
I thought I would be strongest, there I found I
was weakest; and, when removed from outward
temptation, inward corruption increased, and baffled
my utmost efforts. The more I strove to keep
my own heart and life from sin, the more sin
triumphed over me. I found, in my experience,
that I was a slave to sin; for what I set myself to
overcome, overcame me. At the same time, the
spirituality of God's law increasingly opened on
my mind; I daily saw more of the extent of the
work I had assigned to myself to perform, in order
to obtain the favour of God; and found that my
practice, in place of getting nearer, was getting
farther from it. When I looked back on the mercies
I had received, and the promises and resolutions
I had made, I saw that I had all along been
mocking God, having never fulfilled any of them.
This broke my peace of mind; I became more
subject to the terrors of the law than I had ever
been; my conscience accused me of the blackest
ingratitude; I had no refuge to fly to; my sins became
too heavy for me; the justice of God stared
me in the face; and now I saw that I was a condemned
criminal. I gave over all hope of obtaining
the favour of God by my own doings; I
resolved to mock him with no more promises of
amendment of life; I confessed that hell was what
I deserved; that the law which condemned me
was just: and, when I did this, the importance of
being delivered from such a dreadful situation was
increasingly impressed upon my mind: but how to
obtain that deliverance I could not tell. I saw by
the Scriptures, that "unless a man be born again,
// File: 194.png
he can not enter into the kingdom of God," and
that no unholy being shall enter heaven. I prayed
earnestly for the new heart and the right spirit, but
did not correctly understand in what this change
consisted. I passed a considerable time subject to
sharp conflicts in my mind, during which, the
stings of conscience and the terrors of the law
were beyond description: but all was kept within
my own breast, without being discerned by any
one. My leg continued bad until the beginning
of 1803, when I confined myself to bed for some
weeks, and had the pleasure once more of seeing
it heal. I felt thankful to God for this new mercy;
but it added fresh torment to my mind, for it furnished
my conscience with new matter of accusation.
In perusing Boston's "Fourfold State," I
was startled at reading how the branches are
taken out of the natural stock. I saw my own
case pretty fully described; but as I did not understand
what it was to be "apprehended of Christ,"
and united to the vine, it only increased my uneasiness.
I also heard a man in conversation in
my company declare, that, before a sinner can be
brought to God, the same power behooved to be
exerted that converted the apostle Paul. I did not
assent to what he said, because I did not believe
it; but I marked the saying. I became increasingly
uneasy; I had no peace in my mind; eternity
was before me; I was without hope, and knew not
how to obtain it. "What," said I, "shall become
of me!" I was agitated almost to despair; all that
prevented me from falling into it was the consideration
that I was yet in life, and that God had
// File: 195.png
not forbidden me to cry for mercy: and for mercy
I did cry, if peradventure I might find it.
My leg now threatened to break out again.--This
alarmed me more, and it prevented me from
going, as I had done, to the Tabernacle. The
forenoon of the second Sabbath after Albion-street
chapel was opened, I passed solitary at home; but
I was in a most painful state of mind, of which
the agitations can not be described. My convictions
of sin were so sharp as to drive me into a
state, which, if it was not absolute despair, could
hardly be distinguished from it. I could not bear
my own presence, and became afraid to be alone.
"What shall become of me!" was the unremitting
thought of my agitated soul. It at length drove
me to my knees; where, with tears, I confessed my
sins to God without reserve or palliation; fully
acknowledged the righteousness and justice of his
law; disclaimed all merit of my own; confessed
that I never had any, nor any ability to obtain it;
that I was totally unable to do any thing to procure
his favour, or to recompense him for it, should
he bestow it; and that if I was saved from endless
wo, it would be, because he would have
mercy on me, out of his own sovereign pleasure,
and not on account of any merit of mine. I cast
myself upon his pure mercy, and confessed that if
there was not pure mercy for sinners, I could have
no hope.--When I arose from my knees, it was
near the time of the afternoon's service. I felt
quite uneasy at home. I thought I would venture
as far as to Albion street chapel, because it was at
no great distance, and because I had heard my
// File: 196.png
father speaking favourably of you as a preacher. I
was the more disposed too to go there, because I
knew you were in connexion with Mr. Ewing, of
whom I had formed a favourable opinion. When I
got to the chapel, I was all attention. When you
prayed, I endeavoured to pray also. But nothing
particularly affected me, until you gave out your
text, 1 Cor. ii. 2. "For I determined not to know
any thing among you, save Jesus Christ and him
crucified."--I was struck with the text, and became
anxiously attentive, to see if I could catch
any thing from the discourse which was to follow,
that could give ease to my troubled mind. You
had preached from it the preceding sabbath, and
having recapitulated what you had gone over, you
proceeded to the remainder of the subject; the
tenor of which was, the nature of the work that
Christ had accomplished in the room of sinners, for
their salvation. As you proceeded, I thought I began
to discern something I had not seen before.--But
when you proved from the Scriptures, that the
work which Christ had finished on mount Calvary,
was of itself sufficient to save sinners, and that God
had accepted his work as satisfactory to him; that,
therefore, the work of Christ being perfect, nothing
could be added to it; that it was impious to
attempt to add any thing to it, and that sinners
ought to rest satisfied with that which God had
declared was satisfactory to him, seeing he knew
best what was necessary to satisfy his justice, and
to secure his own honour in pardoning sinners; that
no good works were required of the sinner by God,
as the ground of his acceptance with him, either in
// File: 197.png
whole or in part, but that it was the merit of the
work of Christ alone, that justified sinners in the
sight of a holy God, and that all the praise of their
salvation belonged to Christ, and to the grace of
God in him; and that sinners should believe this
doctrine as good news, and put their trust in it for
the salvation they needed.--You I think spoke also
of the effect which the faith of this doctrine had
on all them that believed it, in leading them to
love God, and to keep his commandments. I was
greatly enlightened by the whole discourse; but
my mind particularly catched the words, that the
work of Christ was of itself perfect; that nothing
could be taken from it, or added to it; and that it
was impious to attempt to add any thing to it.--This
doctrine appeared new to me. I thought I
had never heard it before. I left the chapel when
the service was over, repeating to myself the
words, "The work of Christ is perfect, sufficient of
itself to save a sinner;" and, as I repeated it, I said,
"This is good news if it be true." Another
thought now started into my mind:--"If it be true
that nothing can be added to it, and that it is impious
to attempt it, how guilty have I been!"--My
whole train of repentances, promises, resolutions,
and attempted reformations, has not only been sinful
in the sight of God, on account of their failures,
but have been impious acts of rebellion; not on
account of my endeavouring to forsake sin, and to
cultivate holiness, but on account of the motive
that produced them, which was a desire to work
out a righteousness of my own, to the rejecting of
the righteousness of Christ; placing my works on
// File: 198.png
a level with his, nay, above his; seeking to merit
God's favour by my own doings; and when doubting
of their complete sufficiency, having recourse
to the merits of Christ, merely to make up the deficiency
of mine; and even this, not from voluntary
choice, but from a feeling of necessity. This
was a new source of guilt to my conscience, which
had never burdened it before. I began to apprehend
I had been guilty of the sin of unbelief,
so often spoken of in the Scriptures, and so strongly
condemned. But while my conscience accused
me of this, a gleam of hope dawned on my soul,
by ruminating on the sufficiency of the work of
Christ; and the more I pondered on the subject,
my hope increased, and the more my hope increased,
the stronger my sense of the sin of unbelief
grew. These two things kept pace with one another:
and while hope cheered my heart, this new
sense of guilt made me humble. I did not think
less of the guilt of my other sins; but this sin seemed
to outweigh them all, so that I became increasingly
vile in my own sight.
I read the Scriptures, with prayer to God for
light and direction, that I might truly judge the
doctrine I had been hearing, and not be led astray
by that which was not his own truth. I compared
scripture with scripture; and I now found
the very great benefit of being acquainted with the
letter of the Bible, and of having much of it on my
memory. My meditations were greatly assisted
by what was stored in it; for when employed at
my work, I often recollected passages, and compared
them together. All the drift of my thoughts,
// File: 199.png
was to find if there was evidence of the sufficiency
of the work of Christ, for a sinner's salvation; and
in many of these passages I found such evidence:
they appeared to me in a new light; and the sense
was so obvious, that I wondered how I had not
seen it before. This new discernment gradually
increased; and, as my wound did not break out, I
continued to attend Mr. Ewing's ministry, and
was growing in knowledge by means of his sermons.
One of them was particularly blessed to
me. It was an evening sermon from Matth. iii.
17. "And lo, a voice from heaven, which said,
This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased."
The moment the text was read, I catched the
words, "in whom I am well pleased." I saw them,
as containing a proof of God's satisfaction in the
work of his Son on the behalf of sinners; I followed
the preacher through the discourse, and
was at no loss to comprehend his meaning; the
doctrine was plain and evident to me. I had still,
however, some perplexity in my mind, about the
nature of the good works to be performed after
believing. But this was removed by a sermon
from Mr. Greig[#] from Heb. iii. 14. "For we are
made partakers of Christ, if we hold the beginning
of our confidence steadfast unto the end." My
mind now became decided; I saw that if a sinner
had Christ, he had all. I was sweetly constrained
to give myself wholly up to him; to be content
to be saved by his merits, to the entire and eternal
exclusion of my own; to place my hope of acceptance
// File: 200.png
with God, both now and hereafter, solely
upon his perfect righteousness, and complete
atonement; and to commit my polluted soul to the
gracious influence of his Spirit, that he might so
apply the blood of Christ, as to "purge it from
dead works, to serve the living God." I now saw
that deliverance from sin itself, was a part of the
salvation of Christ: and I was led to trust in him
for sanctification, as well as for righteousness and
redemption. I now understood clearly what had
puzzled me, when I read the book on Contentment,
in Athlone. I was no longer at a loss to
understand what it was to be willing to do all
things for Christ, and to be willing to deny all
things for Christ. I saw that Christ is his people's
strength; that the power which enables them to
perform duty, to resist temptation, and to overcome
their spiritual enemies, is wholly derived
from him; that therefore when they conquer their
enemies, and bring forth the fruits of righteousness,
the glory of the conquest belongs to him through
whose strength they have been performed. I
therefore esteem it my high privilege as well as
duty, to "count all things but loss for the excellency
of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord;"
for whom I trust I have, in a measure, been
made willing to "suffer the loss of all things, and
to count them but dung, that I may win Christ,
and be found in him, not having mine own righteousness
which is of the law, but that which is
through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which
is of God by faith." Phil. iii. 9, 10.
My next concern was, about the question,--What
// File: 201.png
is the proper form of church government?--I
had been made a little acquainted with the claims of
Episcopacy, and they perplexed me a good deal.
Upon the general question, my stock of information
was small. This much I knew, that all parties referred
a good deal to the Acts of the Apostles, for proofs
of their respective opinions; and, as Mr. Ewing had
commenced a course of lectures upon that book, I
hoped to obtain such information, as should enable
me to come to a determination in my own mind.
I continued to hear him with a good deal of interest,
until he had gone through the fifteenth chapter.
I then embraced his opinions on that subject; and,
feeling the want of Christian fellowship, I determined
to make present conviction the rule of present
duty; and seeing that it was the will of
Christ that his people should be united together in
fellowship, I resolved to apply to Mr. Ewing, for
admission to the church under his care. Being at
a loss from my ignorance of the mode of application,
and entire want of acquaintance with any of
the members of his church, I wrote him a letter.
This introduced me to a conversation, with which
he was satisfied, and my case was to be mentioned
to the church at their next meeting. I had no
sooner returned home, however, than the words of
Jesus, John iv. 36. "And he that reapeth receiveth
wages, and gathereth fruit unto life eternal;
that both he that soweth and he that reapeth
may rejoice together," occurred to my mind.--This
led me to remember you, my dear Sir, through
whom I had received the knowledge of the truth,
and to consider whether there was not a propriety,
if not a duty, rather to apply to the church under
// File: 202.png
your care, for admission, than to Mr. Ewing's. I
determined to consider this point, and wrote to
Mr. Ewing, requesting him to delay mentioning my
case to his church, as something had occurred to
my mind, which it appeared to be my duty previously
to consider, but as soon as I should come to
a determination I should let him know. I then
attended your preaching, to see whether it would
be as beneficial to me as Mr. Ewing's. You were
then lecturing in the forenoons through the 1st
Epistle of John. As I was but a babe in Christ,
doctrinal subjects were what I stood most in need
of. I found myself edified by your discourses, and
I felt an increasing attachment to you as my spiritual
father; and, as we were of one mind on matters
of church order, it appeared clearly to be my
duty to seek for admission into your church. Every
tie of spiritual affection seemed to require it. You
had, through the blessing of the great Head of the
church, sowed to me the words of eternal life: I,
through his blessing, had reaped them; and, as
there was no obstacle betwixt us, love said it was
most proper, that he that sowed and he that reaped
should rejoice together; for where should a
convert to the truth seek to be, but under the care
of the instrument that converted him? There must
be a peculiarity of affection, betwixt a spiritual
father and his children, beyond that of others
placed under his care and instruction. This peculiar
affection had now begun to operate in my
mind; for at first I had been so much taken up
with the discovery of the truth itself, that I had
paid little attention to the instruments who preached
it; but I now found leisure to give them a place,
// File: 203.png
in their various degrees, in my affections, without
losing any regard for the truth, or for its great
Author and object, Jesus Christ, the Chief Shepherd
of the sheep. In order therefore to strengthen
your hands in the work of an under shepherd, as
well as for my own benefit, I drew up a summary
narrative of my life and experience, and of the way
in which it had pleased the Lord to lead me to a
knowledge of his precious truth, and sent it to Mr.
Ewing, with the reasons why I thought it my duty
to apply for admission to your church. These
reasons Mr. Ewing approved of; he gave you
that narrative to introduce me to you; and I was
soon favoured with being admitted under your
pastoral care. The narrative is now greatly enlarged;
but before bringing it to a close I wish to
make a few general remarks.
I would begin with stating, that the belief of
that doctrine which gave peace to my troubled conscience,
gave also a degree of stability to my
conduct, such as I had never before been able,
with my utmost efforts, to attain. Not but that I
have still to lament, that sin dwells in me; but,
by the grace of God, it does not reign over me, as
formerly; and the less I think of myself, and the
lower I estimate my own strength, and the more
I trust to the gracious promise of imparted strength,
from the compassionate and all powerful Redeemer,
the stronger I am. Whilst I rejoice in the possession
of the new man, I have still to mourn the
existence of the old; I find in my experience increasing
evidence of the deceitfulness and desperate
wickedness of the heart, and see increasing reason
// File: 204.png
to be vile in my own eyes, and to pray continually
"God be merciful to me a sinner," but I trust in
his grace, that he will "fulfil in me all the good
pleasure of his goodness, and the work of faith
with power," and "preserve me by his power,
through faith unto salvation," enabling me to
maintain the war of the spirit against the flesh,
until I get a complete and eternal victory.
And here I must express my gratitude to God,
for the benefit of Christian fellowship, and of pastoral
care and instructions. It is now about sixteen
years since I first heard you preach, and
became a member of the church under your ministry.
We have had our trials, to exercise our
forbearance and patience; but we have also had
our comforts. I still love the brethren, and while
I say, "Grace be to all them who love our Lord
Jesus Christ in sincerity," I wish for no other fellowship;
and while I love all who preach Christ
crucified, as the only ground of a sinner's acceptance
with a holy God, yet I desire no other teacher
than he who first turned my wandering feet into
the way that leadeth to life. Your instructions
and warnings have, I trust, enabled me to keep in
that way with my face Zionward. May the Lord
grant, that we may continue to walk together, and
be, in our respective stations, comforts to each
other on the road, until we arrive at the heavenly
Jerusalem;--and there may I be one of those,
who shall be to you, "a crown of joy and rejoicing
in the presence of the Lord!" There may we
rejoice together, in the rich mercy of the great
Redeemer, and give him all the praise, for converting
// File: 205.png
and preserving grace, both in the convert and
in him who was the instrument of his conversion;
and may you have many more in whom to rejoice,
besides the subject of this narrative! I thank God
for the success with which he has been pleased to
bless your labours. There are not a few, who
now sit under your ministry, who have received
the knowledge of the truth by means of your
preaching; and others, I believe, have joined the
church above. May the Lord grant you increasing
success in turning sinners to God, and in edifying
saints; may he bless the labours of all his
servants and people; and may his own word have
free course and be glorified, by the overturning of
the kingdom of sin and of Satan in the world; and
may the "kingdoms of this world soon become the
kingdoms of our Lord and of his Christ." Amen.
.pm verse-start
I remain, Dear Pastor,
Your Affectionate Son
In the Faith of the Gospel,
G. B.
GLASGOW, January, 1819.
To the Rev. Ralph Wardlaw.
.pm verse-end
.fn #
The short duration of the peace, however, prevented
the fulfilment of it.
.fn-
.fn #
Then assistant to Mr. Ewing; now minister of the congregation
in Crown Court, London.
.fn-
.sp 4
.h2 id=postscript
POSTSCRIPT.
.sp 2
Having now finished my narrative, may I take
the liberty of adding a few reflections, with a view
to direct the minds of those who may read it, to
the lessons I should wish them to learn from it.
// File: 206.png
There are two things which are conspicuous in
it; the first is, a sinner's weakness; the second is,
a sinner's blindness.--It shows how long and how
often I attempted to cleanse my own heart. I made
the effort under all the variety of circumstances I
have mentioned, but all in vain. I acted under
all the motives I could collect from a sense of the
glory, goodness, justice, and general mercy of God,
as displayed in the works of creation and providence;
and also from what I had learned from the
Bible of the requirements of the moral law, which
was often like a fire in my conscience; and from
a fear of hell and eternal judgment, and a desire
of heaven and eternal life; and from a sense of
mercy to myself in being so often protected when
in imminent danger, delivered out of trouble, and
brought back from the very jaws of death in answer
to my prayers for mercy:--yet all these put
together were insufficient to keep me from breaking
the commandments of God, and being guilty
of what I condemned in my own conscience.--And
thus it will be with every sinner, that sets
himself to perform the same task. I do not refer
to my experience, as an exclusive proof of this;
but I refer to it as an instance of the truth of God's
word, which declares that sinners are "without
strength." Rom. v. 6. Let any sinner undertake
the same task, and I can assure him from the word
of God, that he will come no better speed. He
may attempt it again and again; but every new
attempt will only show his weakness and blindness;
and, as he proceeds, he will find that he was
not aware of the ten thousandth part of the extent
// File: 207.png
and difficulty of the task. If he persevere in it,
he will find it necessary, after endeavouring to reform
his outward conduct, to look within, and there
he will discover work he was not at first aware of.
He will find it absolutely indispensable to watch
over his heart if he means to reform external conduct:
for it is the heart that first yields to temptation.
And, let his resolutions be ever so strong,
and his intentions ever so sincere, he will find that
the slightest temptations are sufficient to overcome
him. Nor will he be in danger from outward
temptations only; for although he were in the retirement
of a hermit, and totally secluded from the
world, he would find temptations to sin rising spontaneously
out of that very heart which had formed
the resolution not to commit it; he would find
himself led like a captive to the commission of it,
and that in the face of the clear light of duty, and
in spite of the strongest remonstrances of conscience;
thus giving him the most convincing
evidence, if he had eyes to see it, that "the
heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately
wicked;" (Jer. xvii. 9.) that "he that committeth
sin is the servant (or slave) of sin;" (John viii.
34,) and that "he that trusteth in his own heart is
a fool." (Prov. xxviii. 26.) So long, however, as
a sinner has any confidence in his own strength, he
will not renounce it, in order to depend upon
strength to be imparted from another. So long as he
fancies any merit in his own works, he will trust to
them to procure his Maker's favour. But in this he
only shows his blindness. O that I could convince
any into whose hands this narrative may fall, to renounce,
// File: 208.png
as entirely hopeless, all such efforts; and also
as entirely worthless, all such attempted reformations;
and to flee to the all-mighty and all-meritorious
Redeemer! You need his perfect righteousness
to justify you, and his blood to atone for your sins;
you need the gracious influences of his Spirit to
purify your hearts, and to give you strength to
walk in the ways of God; for the motive to obedience
that alone can enable you to walk with
steadfastness and consistency, arises out of the belief
of the love of Christ, in giving himself a ransom
for the guilty. The belief of this will inspire
you with love to him in return; and this, and this
alone, will set your souls at liberty from the slavery
of sin. It is to those who believe the love that
he manifested in freely giving himself a sacrifice
for them, that he imparts strength to resist temptation;
and he warns all his disciples, that "without
him they can do nothing." He has promised his
grace as sufficient for them that trust in him in the
most trying situations, and to perfect his strength
in their weakness:--nor is this an empty promise;
for he, to whom it was more immediately addressed,
declared, that "he could do all things through
Christ who strengthened him;" and the way in
which he obtained the power was, by being conscious
of his own weakness, and trusting entirely
to the promised strength of the Saviour; "for,"
says he, "when I am weak then am I strong." 2
Cor. xii. 7-10, with Phil. iv. 13--Go you and
do as he did; and you will find that Christ will
be the same to you that he was to him, for the
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Saviour is unchangeable; "the same yesterday,
and to day, and for ever." Heb. xiii. 8.
I have been minute in detailing the exercises of
my mind, much more so than some may think
there is need for. I have been induced to this in
order to show how long and how strenuously a
sinner may go on in that course, although his efforts
are constantly failing; and fail they must, so long
as his hopes terminate on himself, and so long as
he refuses to put his entire confidence in the Saviour.
He may give over the task in despair, and
sink into carelessness and indifference; but if,
whilst he finds his hopes of himself fruitless, he is
still convinced of the importance and necessity of
the salvation of his soul, and feels that he is one
ready to perish; then the news of a Saviour will
be glad tidings to him indeed; and with the death
of his legal hopes a life of evangelical obedience
will commence. I have been induced to be minute,
from a desire to show to others the folly of continuing
to labour in the fire, as I did, for very
vanity; and that they may see the necessity of
fleeing directly to the Saviour. If you are saved
at all you must do this at the last; and why not
to-day as well as to-morrow, or any future period?
Jesus says, "To-day if ye will hear my voice,
harden not your hearts:" he says, "Come unto
me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I
will give you rest." And why will ye not hear
his voice, and accept of his invitation to-day? If
you reject him to-day, you may not live till to-morrow.
All the offers of the gospel are present
offers; there is no promise respecting to-morrow.
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Jesus is as able to-day as to-morrow. He offers
himself to-day. His salvation is a present salvation.
"Behold, now is the accepted time; behold,
now is the day of salvation."
If any read this narrative who are putting off the
concerns of their immortal souls to a death-bed,
and are deluding themselves with the notion, that
the distress of a sick-bed and the fear of death
will break the power of sin in their hearts, and that
they will then repent and believe; while you think
this, you show that you do not know what repentance
and faith are; for, did you know what they
are, you would already have repented and believed.
You can not know them until you are in actual
possession of them. Your conduct is, therefore,
ignorant and presumptuous. Faith and repentance
are present duties; and if you will not repent of
your sins now, and believe in the Lord Jesus
Christ for salvation, what security have you that you
will do so hereafter? you may be brought to a sick-bed;
and there the approach of death, and the fear
of hell, and remorse of conscience, arising out of
convictions of sin, may greatly alarm you; but this
will not change your heart, nor save your soul.
Such a state of mind is neither repentance nor
conversion. How often was I in danger, and
imagined I repented; and, when I was at the point
of death, I thought I had repented in truth. But
my conduct after I had recovered showed that I
had deceived myself; and had I died in the state
I then was in, I must have perished. When you
are laid on a sick-bed, you may find that you have
no hope of heaven if you die at present; you may
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wish to recover, that you may change your conduct;
you may cry to God to spare you; but he
may not hear you; and when you see that death is
actually approaching, you may be driven to despair,
and die without hope: or, in order to calm
a troubled conscience, you may persuade yourselves,
that you have repented, and that, as you
are not allowed to live, God will accept of the
sincerity of your repentance; and you may thus
"go down to the grave with a lie in your right
hand." But if you despise the offer of a Saviour
now, and put off these things to a death-bed,
which many never see, but are called suddenly
out of the world, the probability is, that when you
are actually laid upon it, however old you may be,
and however evident the approach of your latter
end may be to all who see you, you will not think
you are going to die yet, but will still indulge the
hope of longer life;--until death lays his cold
hand on your heart, and closes your eyes for ever
on a present world.
Should this narrative fall into the hands of any
who are in the army, I would earnestly entreat
them to lay the contents of it seriously to heart,
and to beware of the delusive idea that it is not
needful to be religious in the army. Although you
are soldiers, you are still surely under the government
of your Creator. Your being in the army
will not excuse the sins you commit in it. There
is no article of war that commands you to swear,
or to get drunk, or to be guilty of uncleanness, or
any other sin. There is no order that prohibits
you from repenting of your sins, and believing on
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the Lord Jesus Christ for the salvation of your invaluable
souls, and living a life of faith upon the
Son of God; so that you are without excuse. Your
being in the army does not give you a greater
security of long life to be an excuse for delay. On
the contrary, you, above all men, ought to secure
the salvation of your immortal souls. And blessed
be God, that salvation is offered as freely to you
as to others. Jesus, the King of kings, offers you
his free and unmerited favour, in the same way
that he does to others; and makes you as welcome.
Your souls are as precious to him, as those of any
of the human race: so that you are without excuse.
Beware of another delusion;--that the army is a
place in which it is impossible to live a godly life.
This is not true. However hard it is, yet it is
possible, and has been done. If indeed you attempt
to live a godly life in your own strength, as
I did, you will fail; but remember, so would you
in any situation in which you could be placed.
But if you believe in the Lord Jesus, and take
him for "righteousness and strength," he will fulfil
to you his promise, that "as your day is, so shall
your strength be." Remember that the way that
leadeth to eternal life is a narrow way to all; and
that the same grace which enables others to travel
that narrow way is sufficient to enable you to
travel it also; and that the same power which
brings others safely through, is able to carry you
also in safety to the end of the journey. Remember
that it is the power of God and not of man
that enables any to persevere unto the end; and
will you say that it is not in the power of the
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Almighty to enable a soldier to serve him in the
army, and to lead a Christian life in it? The idea
is blasphemous; it is a delusion of Satan; and it
is an unjust charge upon the army, bad as it is,
and one of the greatest obstacles, if not the very
greatest, to its moral improvement; for it goes to
prevent the very attempt at improvement, as utterly
hopeless, and consequently to leave the individuals
who compose it to be confirmed in all their evil
habits. If any soldier read this, let me beseech
him to lay seriously to heart the immense value of
his soul, and to believe in the grace and power of
a Redeemer, and, although there should not be
one godly person in his regiment, let him not be
afraid to believe in Jesus, and to regulate his conduct
by his word. Do not be afraid of the mocking
of your comrades: it is indeed not easy to
bear; but if you really trust in Christ, he will
enable you to live down their reproaches by a
consistent and steady course of life. Their reproaches
are not to be put in comparison with his
smiles; and if the King of kings smiles upon you,
what need you care who frowns? It will become
you rather to pity, than to be offended at them.
Seek, by constant prayer, for that prudence and
wisdom which will enable you so to act as to put
to silence their foolish scoffings; and, if you persevere,
you will extort from them so much commendation
as will repay you for all the reproaches
you have borne, or may still be subject to. But
let your faith be constant and your practice persevering.
Do not take up religion by fits and
starts. Those who do so show that they have not
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yet understood what it is. Unless your repentance
be that of the Bible, and your faith in Jesus
genuine, arising from a scriptural understanding
of your own character as a guilty and helpless
sinner in the sight of God, and a scriptural discernment
of the rich grace and almighty power of
Christ, you will not be able to stand: for the army
is not a place for hypocrites, formalists, and self-righteous
professors, to prosper in. The professions
of such will generally vanish like smoke.
The genuine believer in Jesus alone is able to
abide the trial; and he stands, because he is
upheld by the power of God through faith unto
salvation. Therefore, let no soldier neglect his
salvation, through fear that the temptations of the
army will be too much for him. Great as they
are, if he trusts in Christ, he shall be made "more
than a conqueror through him that loved him;"
and the more he can get his comrades to attend
to the same things, the temptations will diminish.
And the more the religion of Jesus prevails in the
army, and the greater the number of genuine disciples
are in it, the greater improvement will be
made in its character, efficiency, and comfort.
I rejoice that the army is beginning to be more
attended to of late, in a religious point of view. I
rejoice to see Bible Societies in operation for the
benefit of the army and navy; and wish them an
increasing measure of success. The attention of
the religious world has not yet been sufficiently
drawn to the importance of the object. I hope
that the stimulus that has been put in motion will
continue to increase, and that a succession of prudent
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measures will be adopted for the promotion
of the fear of God in the army and navy. The
same means that are effectual for the attainment
of this great object amongst the other classes of
mankind will be effectual here. And what a
blessing would it be to the army and navy, were
the fear of God their prevailing character! How
would it promote subordination, peace, sobriety,
and chastity, and, in so doing, prevent the frequency
and necessity of punishments and rigorous
regulations, and the prevalence of those diseases
which break the constitutions of such numbers,
renders them non-effectives, and sends so many of
them to an early grave!--And how much benefit
would instantly accrue to society, in the reduction
of the contamination of profanity, intemperance,
and lewdness! How many female characters
would be preserved, and the consequent grief of
parents prevented! How much of the evil of prostitution
would it reduce, which is so dangerous to
youth in sea-port towns, and large cities! If my
feeble voice could be heard, I would add it to that
of those who have already appeared as advocates of
this cause, in supplicating British Christians to
prosecute this object with prudent but vigorous
perseverance. I rejoice to see a floating chapel
provided upon the Thames for the instruction of
seamen. This, I hope, will be followed by similar
measures wherever they are necessary. The wisdom
that devised this, is competent to devise all
that is wanting for the prosecution of this great
cause, throughout the army and navy. And the
same motives are sufficient to carry those embarked
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in it forward with zeal until the fear of God
finally triumph. And its triumph in the army and
navy will remove one of the obstacles to its prevalence
in the world. And who knows but that
genuine piety may not only prevail but even shine
most conspicuously in the army and navy, and that
the last may become first.
G. B.
THE END.
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Transcriber's Notes:
Archaic and colloquial spelling and punctuation was retained.
Missing or obscured punctuation was corrected.
Footnotes have been collected at the end of the text, and are\
linked for ease of reference.
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Text that was in italics is enclosed by underscores (italics).
Footnotes have been moved to follow the chapters in which they are referenced.
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